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Paul Reubens: Difference between revisions
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[[Image:Pee_wee_has_candy_for_you.jpg|thumb|Pee Wee has candy for you.]] | [[Image:Pee_wee_has_candy_for_you.jpg|thumb|Pee Wee has candy for you.]] | ||
[[Image:Pee-wee Goatse.jpg|thumb|Pee Wee, looking inside a huge [[Goatse]].]] | |||
[[Image:Pee-wee-Yvonne.jpg|thumb|Pee Wee showing Yvonne how to walk like a proper lady.]] | [[Image:Pee-wee-Yvonne.jpg|thumb|Pee Wee showing Yvonne how to walk like a proper lady.]] | ||
[[Paul Reubens]] is an [[unfunny]] [[retard]] | [[Image:Paul Reubens Mugshot.jpg|thumb|This man entertains children.]] | ||
[[Paul Reubens]] <strike>is</strike> was an [[unfunny]] [[retard]] weirdo who somehow managed to get [[famous]]. His main character is a [[faggot]] of [[epic]] proportions, Pee-Wee Herman. After [[you fail it|failing it]] while trying to get on ''[[Saturday Night Live]]'', he successfully landed a contract with HBO. This was the beginning of the shit-storm of [[stupid]] that was to follow, and unfortunately still continues to this day. | |||
== The Pee Wee Herman Show == | == The Pee-Wee Herman Show == | ||
This show basically consisted of Pee Wee standing on stage and pulling [[jenkem|shit out of a paper bag]]. Can you say "[[ghey]]"? [[condescension|Of course you can]]. | This show basically consisted of Pee-Wee standing on stage and pulling [[jenkem|shit out of a paper bag]]. Can you say "[[ghey]]"? [[condescension|Of course you can]]. | ||
== Pee Wee's Big Adventure == | == Pee-Wee's Big Adventure == | ||
[[Image:Dildo_bike.JPG|left|frame|Pee Wee loves his bike.]] | [[Image:Dildo_bike.JPG|left|frame|Pee-Wee loves his bike.]] | ||
[[Teh]] [[Best]] movie [[Evar]]. Some [[Jews|movie execs]] at Warner Brothers Studios were smoking [[crack]] one day, and decided to let Paul Reubens make his very own movie. The touching story of a [[fruit]]y, albino, [[Malcolm X]]-dressing motherfucker who has lost his [[bike]] and spends the rest of the movie searching for it. It also gave [[Tim Burton]] a job, which he did [[for the lulz]]. | [[Teh]] [[Best]] movie [[Evar]]. Some [[Jews|movie execs]] at Warner Brothers Studios were smoking [[crack]] one day, and decided to let Paul Reubens make his very own movie. The touching story of a [[fruit]]y, albino, [[Malcolm X]]-dressing motherfucker who has lost his [[bike]] and spends the rest of the movie searching for it. It also gave [[Tim Burton]] a job, which he did [[for the lulz]]. | ||
| Line 19: | Line 22: | ||
<center><youtube>BodXwAYeTfM</youtube><br>'''The only scene that matters.'''</center> | <center><youtube>BodXwAYeTfM</youtube><br>'''The only scene that matters.'''</center> | ||
== Big Top Pee Wee == | == Big Top Pee-Wee == | ||
Paul Reubens got to make another movie which involved a circus. Nobody really cared enough to remember anything more about it. Except for [[Chris Crocker]] - "LEAVE PEE-WEE ALONE!" | |||
== Pee Wee's [[Prison|Playhouse]] == | |||
<center><youtube>dUWy21bPGh4</youtube><br></center> | |||
The ramblings of Pee-Wee Herman on [[peyote]] set to television, ''Pee-Wee's Playhouse'' <s>is</s> was an obnoxious show that steadily lowered [[retards|viewers]]' I.Q.s by the minute. Talking chairs, wish-granting genies, and a friendly mail-woman. And a robot too. After being completely forgotten since [[Last Thursday]], it came back on [[Adult Swim]]. The only person who watched was [[you]]. | |||
== Pee-wee's Big Holiday == | |||
Of course, there just '''HAD''' to be another feature film dedicated to this demented fuck. Sometime in [[2016]], Paul Reubens starred in ''[[Shit|Pee-wee's Big Holiday]]''. Pee-Wee Herman fanfags got involved with this in the really early stages and managed to leak what existed of the film hinted in one of Reuben's private conversations in 2010. It all began when a [[Lulz|journalist called Reuben's manager and questioned whether a film was in the works]], to which the manager confirmed this statement. Reubens' chucked a pissy-fit and decided to postpone the production of the film because "[[Lol|The whole thing got leaked and we had just started]]." | |||
Four years after the initial leaks, Reubens' crawled out of his lonely, isolated man-cave and pursued his wet dreams. On [[Last Thursday|March 17th, 2016]], this movie premiered exclusively on [[Netflix|NetShits]]! And not a single fuck was given. | |||
{{quote|I wish I could tell you about it right now, because... I mean, it's [[Bullshit|amazing]]. [[Lie|It's going to be amazing]]. I think it first got leaked [[At least 100|four]] years ago or so that the movie was going to be made, and ever since then it's just been stalling and stalling. So I'm really ready for this to happen. But I'm not kidding: [[Oh shi-|It's very imminent]].|Paul Reubens desperately trying to convince losers to watch his "amazing" award-winning movie.}} | |||
<center><youtube>q08Wt-QdLK0</youtube><br>'''ZOMG LEAK'D FOOTAGE OF THE FILM!!!1'''</center> | |||
<center><youtube>4IrQDMPrZBg</youtube><br></center> | |||
Holy fuck, [[Curry nigger|Alia Shawkat]] (the [[Indian]] that voices the poundcake character from [[Adventure Time]]) starred in this film. God help us all... | |||
[[ | ==Pee-Wee's [[Real Life]] [[Fail|Adventures]]== | ||
<center><youtube> | <center><youtube>uLZptx6UQLk</youtube><br></center> | ||
* 7/26/91 - Paul Reubens is arrested in Sarasota, [[Florida]] for [[fapping]] | * 7/26/91 - Paul Reubens is arrested in Sarasota, [[Florida]] for [[fapping]] inside a private booth at an adult theater and instantly reduces himself to one-liner [[meme]] status. Much [[lulz]] ensues. | ||
* 11/15/02 - Pee Pee Herman turns himself in to [[Los Angeles]] police in November 2002 after being charged with misdemeanor possession of [[CP|kiddie porn]]. | * 11/15/02 - Pee-Pee Herman turns himself in to [[Los Angeles]] police in November 2002 after being charged with misdemeanor possession of [[CP|kiddie porn]]. Reubens/Herman is charged with obscenity and possession on the last possible day by the state Attorney General. It later turns out that Reubens was only in possession of a celebrity sex tape involving a 16-year old actor, and some "vintage muscle magazines" (i.e gay porno from the 1940s-1950s.) Still, "collecting" "various erotic ephemera" is freaking weirdo behavior. | ||
==Gallery== | |||
<center><gallery> | |||
File:Pee wee herman - this is crack PSA gif 1.gif | |||
File:Pee wee herman - this is crack PSA gif 2.gif | |||
File:Pee-Wee Herman Munster.jpg | |||
File:PWH - kept his hands to himself.jpg | |||
File:Pee-wee Goatse.jpg | |||
File:Elf On Shelf - Pee-Wee Herman on a Sherman.jpeg | |||
File:The Club Can't Even Handle Me Right Now - Peewee Herman.gif | |||
File:Pee Wee Herman - At Least I Did It in The Right Kind of Theater.jpeg | |||
</gallery></center> | |||
==See Also== | ==See Also== | ||
*[[Asperger's syndrome]] | *[[Asperger's syndrome]] | ||
*[[1980s]] | |||
*[[Adult Swim]] | |||
== Links == | == Links == | ||
* [http://peeweehermitcrackcocainerz.ytmnd.com/ Pee Wee loves crack.] | * [http://peeweehermitcrackcocainerz.ytmnd.com/ Pee Wee loves crack.] | ||
* [http://snap.to/paul-reubens Paul Reuben's Basement (lol)] | * [http://snap.to/paul-reubens Paul Reuben's Basement (lol)] | ||
* [http://www.thesmokinggun.com/mugshots/reubensmug1.html Pee Wee on thesmokinggun.com] | * [http://www.thesmokinggun.com/mugshots/reubensmug1.html Pee Wee on thesmokinggun.com] | ||
[[category:people|Reubens, Paul]] | [[category:people|Reubens, Paul]] | ||
[[Category:TV and Movies]] | |||
[[Category:2023]] | |||
Latest revision as of 12:07, 25 January 2024
Paul Reubens is was an unfunny retard weirdo who somehow managed to get famous. His main character is a faggot of epic proportions, Pee-Wee Herman. After failing it while trying to get on Saturday Night Live, he successfully landed a contract with HBO. This was the beginning of the shit-storm of stupid that was to follow, and unfortunately still continues to this day.
The Pee-Wee Herman Show
This show basically consisted of Pee-Wee standing on stage and pulling shit out of a paper bag. Can you say "ghey"? Of course you can.
Pee-Wee's Big Adventure
Teh Best movie Evar. Some movie execs at Warner Brothers Studios were smoking crack one day, and decided to let Paul Reubens make his very own movie. The touching story of a fruity, albino, Malcolm X-dressing motherfucker who has lost his bike and spends the rest of the movie searching for it. It also gave Tim Burton a job, which he did for the lulz.
The only scene that matters.
Big Top Pee-Wee
Paul Reubens got to make another movie which involved a circus. Nobody really cared enough to remember anything more about it. Except for Chris Crocker - "LEAVE PEE-WEE ALONE!"
Pee Wee's Playhouse
The ramblings of Pee-Wee Herman on peyote set to television, Pee-Wee's Playhouse is was an obnoxious show that steadily lowered viewers' I.Q.s by the minute. Talking chairs, wish-granting genies, and a friendly mail-woman. And a robot too. After being completely forgotten since Last Thursday, it came back on Adult Swim. The only person who watched was you.
Pee-wee's Big Holiday
Of course, there just HAD to be another feature film dedicated to this demented fuck. Sometime in 2016, Paul Reubens starred in Pee-wee's Big Holiday. Pee-Wee Herman fanfags got involved with this in the really early stages and managed to leak what existed of the film hinted in one of Reuben's private conversations in 2010. It all began when a journalist called Reuben's manager and questioned whether a film was in the works, to which the manager confirmed this statement. Reubens' chucked a pissy-fit and decided to postpone the production of the film because "The whole thing got leaked and we had just started."
Four years after the initial leaks, Reubens' crawled out of his lonely, isolated man-cave and pursued his wet dreams. On March 17th, 2016, this movie premiered exclusively on NetShits! And not a single fuck was given.
—Paul Reubens desperately trying to convince losers to watch his "amazing" award-winning movie. | ||
ZOMG LEAK'D FOOTAGE OF THE FILM!!!1
Holy fuck, Alia Shawkat (the Indian that voices the poundcake character from Adventure Time) starred in this film. God help us all...
Pee-Wee's Real Life Adventures
- 7/26/91 - Paul Reubens is arrested in Sarasota, Florida for fapping inside a private booth at an adult theater and instantly reduces himself to one-liner meme status. Much lulz ensues.
- 11/15/02 - Pee-Pee Herman turns himself in to Los Angeles police in November 2002 after being charged with misdemeanor possession of kiddie porn. Reubens/Herman is charged with obscenity and possession on the last possible day by the state Attorney General. It later turns out that Reubens was only in possession of a celebrity sex tape involving a 16-year old actor, and some "vintage muscle magazines" (i.e gay porno from the 1940s-1950s.) Still, "collecting" "various erotic ephemera" is freaking weirdo behavior.
