Will Hill

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William Hill, best known as twitter, is a renowned crazy mostly known for his posts on Slashdot which blur the already uncertain line between being a Lunix user with a hardon for RMS and paranoid schizophrenia. His standard MO is to make a typically irrelevant and often factually incorrect espousing his love for teh Lunix and his hatred of "M$", which will then be shot down in flames by other posters for being so full of shit. At this point, twitter's persecution complex takes hold - he'll espouse his belief that instead of the replying commenters just being random people sick of his bullshit, they're actually being paid by Microsoft to stalk him. He'll also take the time to either post anonymously or log in to one of his numerous sockpuppet accounts to defend himself, totally failing to realize that his distinctive writing style is a dead giveaway every single time.

His posts have been moderated down so far that anything he posts is now at the score of -1, essentially making it so nobody can see anything he says unless they specifically intend to do so. Due to his paranoia, he interprets this as Microsoft "modbombing" him, as opposed to him sucking shit.

Suffice to say, twitter is either the most successful troll in history or was raped with the Asspie dick one time too many.

Dox

twitter is a Lunix zealot from Baton Rouge, outed as such by Slashdot commenters thanks to his frequent posts on the BRLUG mailing list, where he espouses pretty much the same freetard bullshit he puts about on Slashdot. Enterprising people on the Internets have discovered[1] his home address and phone number, as well as a link to his website [2] which features, among other things, a picture of his fugly wife and fuglier child.

Of course, mentioning that twitter has posted all of this and more in public, while doing things which piss off both reasonable people AND unreasonable ones will simply ramp his persecution complex up another couple of notches, and it is therefore entirely recommended to post such things in reply to every single one of his Slashdot comments.

Sockpuppets

Aside from being a deluded idiot, twitter's main other amusing feature is that every time someone says something nasty about him, or whenever he wants to create the appearance of other people agreeing with whatever he says, he'll quickly log into a different Slashdot account to big himself up and make himself look like some kind of trailblazer. Lots of people do this, all across the Internets, but few are so ridiculously dedicated as to have SIXTEEN SEPARATE ACCOUNTS for this purpose. Interestingly, he often does so while complaining about Slashdot's systems being "gamed" by people with multiple accounts.

Examples of some of twitter's delusions

• twitter earnestly believes that Microsoft are paying Slashdot users to stalk him, harass him, mod him down and reply to all of his posts, believing there to be no other reason to oppose "freedom" (i.e. believing whatever he believes and hating what he hates) [3] [4] [5]
• Any reference to death, no matter how tangential or innocent, in a reply to him is a "death threat", because Microsoft (sorry, M$) are well known for killing people who say they don't like them on Slashdot
• That fax machines still exist means Microsoft sucks [6]
• Banner ads are, you guessed it, Microsoft's fault [7]

The ultimate reply to any one of twitter's posts

[8]

Moderators: Please note that "twitter" is a known fanatical sycophant whose obnoxious offtopic rants are legend here on Slashdot. It doesn't matter what the topic is, he'll find a way to scrape in some pointless Microsoft bashing. While nobody expects us to love Microsoft in any way, his particularly tepid style of calling anyone he replies to "troll" or "liar" or "fanboy" because he happens to disagree with whatever they're saying is well documented and should not be rewarded. If anything, twitter is the type of person that should not be part of the open source/free software community. He is an anathema to all that is good about free software.

I'm posting this so that you (the moderator) have some context to consider twitter and not mod him up whenever he posts his filler preformatted rants about installing Knoppix or Mepis or whatever that unfortunately get him karma every single time and allow him to continue posting his trademark toxic crap (read on) day in and day out. You may consider this a troll - I consider it community service. And I ain't kidding.

If you're a /. subscriber, I invite you to look through some of his posting history. I guarantee that you'll be hard pressed to find someone that is more "out there" than twitter. You'll also probably notice he's got quite an AC following. Don't just read his posts, make sure you go through the replies.

To get an idea of what I'm talking about, check this post out. This is an article about email disclaimers. The parent of the post is complaining about the ads in the linked page and so on, and twitter actually goes off on a rant to blame it on Microsoft and recommend Lynx, because "is teh free".

Here's another. In this post twitter not only calls the OP a troll but attempts to "tell it like it is" while making some vague argument about "GNU". Yes, if you're confused, you're not alone. The reply (modded +4) proceeds to simply destroy his bogus argument. You will notice he did not reply. This is what some people call "drive-by advocacy". A sort of I'll just leave you with my thoughts here and move on to the next flamebait kind of deal. In fact, he almost never replies because he knows that his fanatical arguments simply do not hold up to any sort of discussion. It's not that he's chosen the wrong cause - he's just going at it in a completely wrong way.

Here's that drive-by advocacy and FUD in motion: twitter goes on about some topic and then drops the usual "oh and M$ is teh evil" because "WMP phones home" or some such. Called on his FUD, he then claims that WMP stores every song and movie you've ever played in a file, somewhere. Pressed further, he just sort of slithers out of sight, his FUD-spreading complete. This is not about some Microsoft technology that nobody likes anyway; it's about lying for the sake of lying. Way too many of his posts are exactly like this one.

More? Just read though this post and the subsequent replies. I guess this stands on its own. Or these two. Or this one. Or this one.

Still not convinced? this is what twitter considers "humour" while going about his daily "M$" routine.

More? Bad spelling in astounding conspiracy theories, more offtopic FUD and uninformed "I'm right, look at me" rants, promptly proven wrong. Worse even, twitter wants to be RMS, apparently (that first one is a winner). I mean, really. You think?

FUD, FUD, FUD, FUD, offtopic FUD [slashdot.org], and more FUD. This guy is like the Monty Python SPAM skit, but with FUD and more FUD instead of canned meat. Amazed yet? Don't forget that PowerPoint makes you dumb, and it's all a Microsoft conspiracy. How low do you want to go? Maybe as low as this?

The infamous Fax Manifest? Nuclear fireballs? It goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on. Like the energizer bunny. Or take these two, which stretch the definition of weird. And you have to love this thread.

And in case you haven't had enough, consider that twitter actually thinks Microsoft is out to get him. No, really. He figures he's somehow relevant to the Open Source movement, and that by "attacking" him Microsoft wages war on us. How's that for warped reality. And finally, this should be good for a few chuckles.

It's up to you. We can get rid of this guy and make Slashdot a better place. I don't know about you, but I'd rather take the trolls and crapflooders over people like "twitter" any day. And I sure as hell don't want to be categorized along with him. This [slashdot.org] is not how you advocate free software, period.