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Squid Girl
Squid Girl, also known as Shinryaku! Ika Musume to weeaboos and Japs, is a hilarious animu involving moe (basically cute anime girls who you secretely want to fuck), tentacle rape, and child labor. It is a slice of life comedy and also a shit clone of Yotsuba, except less of a toddler with green hair and more blue-haired&tentacled clueless teenager/squid hybrid who is still a noob to the world. It also happens to be an animu that also became a highly discussed topic and spawned a mini meme on /a/nus. The animu and manga revolve around Ika Musume, a batshit insane girl squid from the sea who tries to take over the world and punish humanity for polluting the ocean, but every single attempt she tries at conquering humanity does not turn out as planned.
Oh and, in the Japanese language version, everything about Ika is a really bad pun on squids; the names of the episodes, her personality, even her version of desu, ~de geso, is a pun because "Geso" is a Japanese term for a sushi dish called Squid legs.
The Characters
Squid Girl aka Ika Musume
The main character who claims to be a squid/human hybrid from the ocean and plans to conquer humanity for polluting the sea. To do this, she tried taking over a beach restaurant named The Lemon and to claim it as her base of operations, but she destroyed the wall of the beach restaurant and was actually retarded enough to be forced to do hard physical labor for the Aizawa sisters and their customers to pay off the damages. She loves shrimp, and is scared of Killer whales and Sharks, even inflatable ones. She falls in love with a girl named Nagisa, because she is the only character in the universe who fears Ika. Ika also claims that she will die if her hat is taken off.
Ika has magical squid powers which include;
- Tentacle hair, which grows back when cut off. She uses them to tentacle rape people in her failed attempts at world domination.
- With her tentacles, she can also produce masterpiece-quality portraits of people from her own imagination, depending on her relationship with them, they also make her the best baseball player on Earth. But she has the talent capacity of a 4 year old with Downs syndrome at both when she just uses her hands.
- She vomits edible squid ink.
- She can glow in the dark at will.
- She can flap the fins on her "hat", although all they don't do anything useful.
- She is able to solve any Math problem in existence, even though she's the most gullible fucking thing in existance; she thinks anything wearing a hat similar to hers is also a squid/human thing.
- And, obviously, seeing as she's a fucking squid, she can swim without breathing. Although she nearly drowned in the second episode of the animu.
As a matter of fact, she is good at everything that you can't do. That is, except invading or conquering humanity
Eiko Aizawa
A ginger dyke that commands Ika to do her bidding. She hates Ika with a passion and is frequently annoyed by her. However, Eiko starts kissing Ika's ass and raping her in her sleep after Ika saves her from drowning in a whirlpool. She's a total retard at school and can't study for shit, resulting in her being terrible at speaking and learning English, despite the fact that Cindy thought that she was speaking English at one point. Thought that's most likely because Cindy is a blonde bimbo fuckwit.
Chiziru Aizawa
A blue-haired woman who almost always has her eyelids closed and appears kind and laid back on the outside, but when she's pissed off, her eyes open and she becomes a female Chuck Norris, who is a batshit insane psycho bitch with extraordinary combat skills.
Takeru Aizawa
A feminine, annoying little boy who loves playing with Ika. Ika hates having to babysit the little faggot and tries to tentacle rape him in order to get him to fuck off, but its not very effective because Takeru loves the tentacles and she eventually gives up. When he wears makeup, he looks like an unconvincing post-op transsexual.
Sanae Nagatsuki
A batshit insane short-haired brunette girl who has an obsessive lesbian crush on Ika Musume, who gets insanely jealous whenever someone else talks to Ika, like the jealous girlfriend you've never had. If she had the chance, she would kidnap Ika and turn her into her sex slave. She dreams about Ika, takes pictures of Ika posing, keeps over 9000 cosplay costumes in her closet for Ika to wear, has shit-tons of Ika pr0nz stored on her PC, and lures her with shrimp. She is also known to have a Vore fetish, because she dressed up as a shrimp in order to get Ika to eat her out.
Near the end of the first series, she commands Ika to physically abuse her, and Ink on her face, which she does. Apparently it made her aroused because she is a masochist fuck and loves it when Ika inflicts pain on her.
She also owns a dog, probably the only normal thing about her.
Alex
Sanae's fluffy azn dog that hates Ika because Sanae, like the lesbian masochist fuckshit that she is, pays more attention to Ika than to her own dog.
Gorou Arashiyama
A lifeguard with an 8-pack who calls himself a Lifesaver, who is Eiko's childhood friend. He wants to fuck the shit out of Chiziru, but is too pussy to admit he likes her so he can get to first base. For now, he's far into the friend zone.
He turns into a sissy when ghosts are mentioned.
Nagisa Saitō
A short-haired girl who is obsessed with surfing and will literally mount and fuck the fin of her surfboard at any given moment. She gets a job at The Lemon, and she is the only character in the series who actually fears Ika and takes her empty threats of invasion seriously. She will literally shit bricks upon getting at least 10 feet in range of her.
Some argue that she is a closet-lesbian, because she once started dressing up as a guy in order to attract female customers and to stop Ika from teasing her.
Ayumi Tokita
A secret slut who makes penises happy just by looking at her. She first appears with her father, wearing a massive helmet resembling Ika to rival The Lemon. She then fucked off for a while and came back wearing another fucking scary helmet which is a portable kitchen, resembling Ika as a fat azn. She then returns over 9000 years later with a black mask-thing to play volleyball to win a 3D TV but it gets knocked off, she then gets gang raped and runs away. She claims that her dad, whose name is unknown, makes them for her because she's a total fucking social retard and can't speak to anyone because she's too shy. In reality, he forces her to wear them because it's his fetish, and he fucks her from behind doggy style while she's wearing them. She's happy doing it, because it pleases him.
Kiyomi Sakura
A middle school girl who Ika meets when playing "Knock, Knock, Ginger", "Knockdown Ginger" or what the Japanese call "Doorbell Ditch", and it goes horribly wrong, just like it does irl. She then becomes Ika's friend because both Ika and Kiyomi are forever alone. They then start scissoring each other until the end of time, and if Sanae ever found out, she would most likely threaten to cut Kiyomi's possible-existance-of-a-man-dick off. She plays baseball.
Fun fact: In the episode about the wishing tree, she wished for bigger tits because just like any other azn girl in existance is a flat-chested beanpole.
Cindy Campbell
A blonde Americunt whore who loves getting tentacle raped and having her face splattered with Ika's squid ink. She's an alien hunter, who lives up to her blonde stereotype of being absolutely fucking retarded, much to the extent that she actually believes that Ika Musume is an alien and temporarily brainwashed Ika into thinking she was one. She spends the series trying to make Ika Musume to admit to being an alien, along with her 3 scientists.
Due to the fact that she came to Japan and can fluently speak Japanese, she is a known weeaboo.
Fun fact: In the episode where she teaches Takeru how to speak English, she is voiced by a machine (or Vocaloid or some other shit) called "Ema Kokubun", because it's a well known fact that the Japanese are horrible English voice actors, due to not being able to properly pronounce English words. Due to the voice synthesis, Cindy's voice sounded more like a shit text-to-speech program.
Harris, Clark, and Martin
Cindy Campbell's trio of mad scientists/sex slaves, who despite being graduates of MIT, are totally fucking retarded. The three try really hard to prove that Ika Musume and Chiziru are aliens. In their quest to find real life aliens, they attempted to invent shit intended to communicate with them, but accidentally invented the cure for cancer, instead of a device for putting aliens to sleep, and a disintegration ray, among other shit inventions that do nothing to prove that Ika or Chiziru are aliens.
Cindy enjoys having foursomes with the scientists and, being a middle-aged Americunt, her favorite is Harris (who is coincidentally a Barack Obama lookalike), with his nigger dick.
Kozue Tanabe
Loli whore who tells Ika to "follow her heart" or some shit, basically telling her that invading isn't all it's cracked up to be and that humans aren't all bad. HAHAHA! Have you seen the idiots that live on the Internet?
According to Wikipedia, the first few syllables of her Japanese name spell out "Tako", meaning Octopus. More tentacle rape guise!
Plot
In case you have Alzheimers or skimmed through the article, you lazy fuck, the animu pretty much just starts out with Ika musume trying to conquer humanity for polluting the ocean, not realising that a lone squid/human isn't going to conquer an entire planet full of humans, and obviously, always fails at every "attempt". The only attempt that was taken, she stood on a table and claimed the restaurant was hers. The story gets really thin after the first episode, because the writers were obviously drunk or on weed at the time, so new characters are introduced every other episode and they keep re-appearing, but that's about it.
Oh, and a gangbang happens halfway through.
DE GESO
 |
| ALERT: THIS IS A FORCED MEME |
| De geso will be posted by the same unfunny newfag until you like it. |
DE GESO was a mini-meme spawned from the rotting putrid vaginas of Ika Musume's fans. It was spammed all over /a/ at one point in time, and therefore was considered a forced meme. It is a meme similar to desu because, just like how Suiseiseki uses "desu" when ending a sentence in Rozen Maiden, Ika Musume uses "de geso" when finishing a sentence.
The differences between "desu" and "de geso" is that "de geso" is a hilarious pun on squids, the fact that Ika doesn't have odd coloured eyes, lacks dolljoints, she has a white& blue dress rather than a green one, and she doesn't have a twin sister. But, she does have tentacles, and everyone jizzed in their pants at the concept of a pre-teen girl forcing herself sexually onto innocent bystanders in order to dominate mankind.
Fortunately, people realised that de geso was not as good as the original desu. As of now, the meme is nearly dead. It is currently on life support and the only ones who refuse to turn off the life support machine and put it out of its misery are weeafaggots.
The entire meme in a nutshell
It's almost dead, but can make a comeback! Right guise?!
Gallery
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Look at that baka -
Because making everything into a cat is a Japanese national pastime -
Same with putting everthing in Yukatas -
Same with maids
Rule 34
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de geso -
de geso -
de geso -
de geso
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de geso -
de geso -
de geso -
de geso -
de geso -
de geso -
de geso -
de geso -
See also
- Tentacle Rape
- Desu
- Yotsuba
- Cthulhu
- Lucky Star - Another shitty animu with various stories in each episode
- K-On! - same shit, but with music instead
External Links
- De geso thread on desuchan
- Ika Musume is a Jew[1]
- Memefags questioning the memetic status of de geso
a/8330: Ika Musume squid hats
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Squid Girl is part of a series on Visit the Anime Portal for complete coverage. |
| Featured article September 8 & September 9, 2011 | ||
| Preceded by Tom Preston |
Squid Girl | Succeeded by 9/11 and Osama bin Laden Double feature! |