Croik

Croik is the owner of a Phoenix Wright forum and website. She is known to have a centipede filled vagina which explains her overall bitch-atude. She masturbates daily in her Edgeworth cosplay to porn of Phoenix Wright because she can't get laid due to her centipedes. Acts like she owns the internet rights to the shitty fandom and has a army of assholes who's bullshit she unleashes on her visitors. But this doesn't stop her from begging for money.

Croik’s omnipotent power comes from the spirit of her deceased ovarian cyst. Once named Kagome, this so-called medical anomaly was born from the immense bitch-tacular sassiness that flows endlessly through her. Though Kagome had to be reabsorbed, its horrible and unyielding magic continues to remain in a terrifying and deadly presence that all who come near her have confessed to feel.

Croik’s one arch-nemesis comes in the form of death-dealing groundhogs, which she has been known to run over mercilessly with cars she borrows from other people, so the deaths can not be traced to her.

Croik loves vore. She has bitten the heads off rabbits in order to make a string of anal beads. She often crams them inside her ass while furiously masturbating to furry fanart of Edgeworth and Phoenix. This is usually done while reciting the Wehrmacht Oath.

She also hates French people but then again, who doesn't.

Croik Cunt-Punch

Croik has on several occasions threatened to punch people in the cunt over the internet. The reasons are mainly weeaboo in nature because she is a complete Japanophile. She tends to import shitty video games written in moonspeak and threaten people with her superior internet ass-kicking skills when she can't get what she wants. She also has a tenancy to call people dickheads, male or female.

Her Asshole Einharjar

The moderators at the [www.http://forums.court-records.net/ C-R Forums] are hand-picked up the God of the Fandom, Croik herself. Croik allows for her mods to run amok, approving of any and all bullshit actions of their parts. She makes the laws of the forums and enforces them in such a way all vistors will be ass raped on sight.

A interesting rule on said forum is thus: Do not engage the mods in useless arguments. As past experience has shown by now, snapping at a mod because you don't agree with their modly decision is the quickest way to get banned.

In essence, questioning them or their actions in any way will get you banned. Never question a mod.

Croik has stated she approves of her moderators treating her visitors like shit because they deserve it, they don't do what she wants, and they don't appreciate what she's done. So as you can plainly see, they deserve to be treated like shit by her and her mods. If you don't worship the ground the mighty Croik walks upon, your ass is banned.

Interesting reasons given for bans have been:

• Disagreeing with a Moderator
• Complaining
• Being A Negative Nancy
• Possibility of Causing Drama
• You're a Faggot
• They Feel Like It
• Being Yaragorm
• All Glory to the hypnogant. (See: Forced Meme )
• Having wet dreams of Gardevoir
• If your name is Gary Glitter
• They Can't Get Laid
• Not Being Apollo Justice's Eternal Sex Slave

But again, that doesn't stop them from begging for money.

LOL Butthurt

This delightful bag of taints thought she was clever, believing firmly that Phoenix Wright would never have her banhammer'd from a forum. Croik isn't Phoenix Wright though. Croik is fucking Miles P. Edgeworth, Perfect Prosecutor. The "P" stands for "Phaggot" because spelling things with a PH is the cool way to do things these days.

The Failed Raid

On April 1st 2007, Goddess Croik and her Team of ass rape Mods decided to steal memes from 4chan to show the internet how badass and they are. Such faggotry did not go unnoticed by a select few butthurt Anonymous who sprung into action. The raping Einharjar stopped the justified rape by insta-banning anybody who joined the forum that night and mocking anonymous with their own memes.

Reasons for Ban/Suspension:

• 300 reasons
• CR DO NOT WANT!
• LOL BAN
• Being Yaragorm
• Being Taffytwat
• Having a high post count and showing off like a faggot with it.
• Jizzing on MLPs
• Longban is Loooooooooongggggg

Furious and injured, the butthurt Anonymous pulled away, sulking in defeat over a lack of planning and /b/lackup.