Call of Duty: WWII

Call of Duty: WWII, also known as "Another WWII Game But 10 Years Later So It's Okay I Guess" is Activision's latest attempt to satisfy the raging cesspool that is Call of Duty's fanbase. After the space opera Infinite Warfare got royally shit on by Battlefield 1 and torn to shreds by the community, Advanced Warfare dev Sledgehammer Games is digging into the dusty old chest of gaming history and resurrecting what is literally the most overdone setting for an FPS: World War II. Essentially you can expect it to be just like all those carbon copy World War II shooter of the early 2000's but in "HD n3xt gen grahphiks".

Campaign

Let's put it this way, the game isn't even out yet but we already know the story. We basically called it. You play as some American recruit who gets thrown on a landing craft that of course, takes you to none other than fucking Normandy Beach. Simply put you shoot some krauts, try not to step on a Bouncing Betty, follow your objectives, and eventually end up at some climactic battle where everybody fucking dies but you save the day and become an hero because that's just how shit works.

Multiplayer

Gee I don't know, how about play fucking World at War again and see how much of difference there is? Oh actually, there a pretty big difference; CoD WWII makes World at War look like the fucking Citizen Kane of the series. For all of World at War's shit, it stayed relatively true to it's core material, gloss over hauling a seven foot long AT rifle around but it looked and if you were high, felt like World War II. CoD WWII throws all that shit right out the window in the name of apparently appeasing butthurt SJWs and feminists and basically slapping together weapons that function nothing like their actual counterparts. While the campaign is apparently sticking close to what World War II was, Sledgehammer said they're dumbing down the historical aesthetic to appeal to wider audience which goes right in line of previous CoDs and their weed filled, rainbow camouflage cesspools. This makes sense since CoD has long established itself in recent years as a martyr of bullshit so it's a little much expecting a franchise whose past two entries first took you to an candy colored wannabe cyberpunk shoot em' up and then to space immediately after that to do World War II justice. Leave it to dumbass CoD fans though to suddenly act like they give a shit about historical accuracy even though a large portion of them probably aren't even past 7th grade yet. Surely Activision believes them to be a bastion of fair criticism and will reward them with a supply drop or some shit as compensation for their troubles.

TL;DR- Sledgehammer made a tremendously shitty game.

Basically, WWII scraps literally everything that made CoD multiplayer what it was for the past decade. Instead of creating classes, you pick from a bunch of divisions with fixed "perks" and literally fuck all customization.

Weapons

You've got real guns in the game this time, however none of them behave in the way you'd expect them to and it kind of kills the experience for people who enjoyed other World War II games before this sack of shit arrived. Oddly enough, they were all much better in the Beta so you can only imagine what kind of drugs they do at Sledgehammer to fuck that up.

Submachine Guns

Literally this was the fucking SMG war.

• M3 Grease Gun: Stamped out of sheetmetal and will probably fall apart. This gun is a slow piece of shit that takes too many shots to kill. Literally only use it if you absolutely must.
• PPSh-41: Fires about a fraction of the speed it should but is still one of the most solid guns in the game and rips people new assholes up close.
• Type 100: Japanese SMG that hardly kicks, but hardly punches either. You have to drain like half a mag into a guy only for him to turn around and blast you with a sniper rifle.
• Waffe-28: Really called the MP-28, and it works nothing like it's overpowered as fuck version in Infinite Warfare. Basically functions like the PPSh should; ass clenchingly high rate of fire but the effective range of a cough.
• M1928: High rate of fire .45 SMG for people who have mobster fantasies. Basically performs a lot like the Waffe but little bit less autistic. Just use the PPSh instead.
• MP-40: Surprisingly not mindfuckingly overpowered. It's actually just really average in this game and the PPSh might serve better in some situations. So in other words, good fucking riddance.

Shotguns

Fucking gib them.

• Combat Shotgun: Basically the only usable shotgun in the whole game. Pull the trigger and whoever is in front of you dies. Simple.
• M30 Luftwaffe Drilling: Double barrel shotgun that more often than not, takes two shots to kill at point blank range. To compensate, has a party trick that basically allows you to single load sniper rounds into it. Pretty stupid.
• Toggle Action: Originally completely useless, this fucking thing feels more like the Reaver or the post buff 205 Brecci now that Sledgehammer recognized how terrible it was, and of course made it too fucking powerful as a result.
• Sawed-Off Shotgun: Basically pointless. Take the M30 and give it worse range and no rifle barrel ability. This gun sucks.

Rifles

Depending on the map, a bolt action is actually more effective.

• M1941: Basically what the FG-42 should have been. High rate of fire and fuckloads of jittery ass recoil. Most SMGs are more effective than this hunk of shit.
• M1 Garand: PING! Long ass effective range and kills in two shots, now with the advantage of not having to empty the clip in order to reload like in Black Ops III and Infinite Warfare. Fuck this gun.
• STG-44: The Kraut's death dealing assault rifle of choice. Basically works like the ACR but with less damage. Most noobs will frequent this gun because of how little skill it takes to use.
• M1A1 Carbine: This gun is massive piece of shit. Take away any advantage you had with the M1 Garand and you're left with a semi-auto that shoots fucking nerf darts at targets.
• FG-42: It's like Sledgehammer just drew the weapon traits for these guns out of hat. Shoots slow as fuck but deals fairly high damage. Perfect for camping like a bitch.
• BAR: Once immensely overpowered, this gun is really only average now. Relatively low recoil with a high fire rate and high damage.
• SVT-40: CTRL-C, CTRL-V of the M1 Garand but with two extra bullets. Okay fine. Why the hell not.

Sniper Rifles

Quickscope like it's 1945.

• Karabin: Basically a copy paste of the Drakon from Black Ops III. As you would expect, it's made of complete hax.
• Lee-Enfield: Commonly used by low level sniper tryhards on their way to the Kar98k. Consistently kills in one shot from the torso up and has handling characteristics that make it more suited for run and gun action.
• M1903: More damage than the Lee-Enfield; kills from the waist up but worse handling. Not like it matters since it's so easy to snipe in this game you can get away with anything really.
• Kar98k: Basically the Lee-Enfield but with faster ADS time and magazine loading. It's hard to go a round without some faggot just completely mopping up with this thing.

Light Machine Guns

Gun down the masses.

• Lewis: Why not the Browning? Literally only here because of Battlefield 1.
• MG15: Never will be as good or cool as the MG42. Has shit damage so you'll get outgunned by basically anything at close range.
• Bren: Statistically, is basically just copy pasted over from the Gorgon. Shoots slow as fuck and deals a fuckton of damage but you'll just get outgunned by a sniper rifle anyways.
• MG42: Shoots slower than it should but still runs out of ammo as soon as you pull the trigger. That being said, run extended mags and watch as you rack up multi-kills from across the map.

Sidearms

Completely useless shit.

• 1911: If they didn't include this gun, Americunts would probably riot. More powerful than the Luger. That's literally all there is to it.
• P08: Classy as fuck German pistol that takes an entire mag to kill someone. Sidearms are basically useless in this game anyways so fuck it.
• Machine Pistol: The fully automatic M712 Mauser. Has basically no ammo and is pretty fucking useless without extended mags, like most guns in this game.

Launchers

Now restricted to a basic training perk so every asshole doesn't use them.

• Panzerschreck: Big ass German rocket launcher with a huge fucking shield that takes up your whole screen.
• M1 Bazooka: This thing practically speaks for itself. Blow shit up the old fashioned way.

Other Shit

• Flamethrower: Perfect for roasting fuckers running around with shotguns or SMGs. Watch as you get sniped as soon as you pull it out.
• US Shovel: Since CoD has basically abandoned having a knife a equipped at all times, you have the option of using a fucking shovel as a secondary. 90% of the time, there's some faggot running around the side of the map whacking people to death in one hit with this thing.

Related Articles

• Call of Duty: World at War - The same game.
• Battlefield 1942 - The same game.
• Medal of Honor - The same game.

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