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Birth or Not
Birth or Not is the blog created by two fatties, Pete and Alisha Arnold, who did the nasty (literally in their case) and got pregnant. They then decided to post a poll on the internet to help them decide whether to flush the fucker out or to contaminate our gene-pool yet further. The poll is due to expire on December 7th, 2010 and is probably the most pathetic attempt at gaining 15 minutes of fame the world has ever seen.
Whatever happens, the unborn fetus should probably be granted pre-emptive emancipation so that it can get the fuck away from its retarded parents and their retarded agenda ... even if it is a lame attempt at a troll.
—Probably the only smart /b/tard involved. |
Controversies other than the FACT that the lulzworthy poll is about performing an abortion
It has been revealed that Pete Arnold, aka ThePete, is a producer and researcher for the uber-conservative Race to the Right radio show. This would normally get liberal tin-foil hat wearing conspiracy theorists angry, but when one realizes that the Arnolds weren't going to get an abortion ever in the first place, perspective takes over.
In addition to this startling revelation, the Arnolds have expressed concern over the fact that their site has undergone DDoS attacks, raids, and an attempted "takeover" of their blog from individuals posting on 4chan's /b/ board.
—Advice in the form of an email that the Arnolds have received. |
While this concern may be well-founded, owing to the ferocious and moronic nature by which /b/tards rabidly attack their victims, it seems that 4chan has itself been trolled into performing for the Arnolds. Prior to 4chan's involvement, the poll had less than 700 total votes. Since the arrival of the /b/tards and the F5 hivemind, the poll and the blog are getting massive traffic, both good and bad. Either way, the site's owners will be laughing all the way to the bank due to the fact that the site is yanking in lots of Google Adsense page impressions from people too stupid to use AdBlock. (On the other hand, the dumb bitch lost her job due to this faggotry.)
No matter what happens, the ultimate victim of all this trolling will be the child itself. Even if they turn out to be the most awesome parents in the world, one day while looking up World of Warcraft on Google, lil' Wiggles junior will discover that his mom and dad once asked the internet whether or not to abort his little ass. This could make Wiggles junior a prime candidate for the Golden iPod Award in 2026.
The Results
Massive botting put the pro-abortion vote to over a million as the polling service is too stupid to check IP addresses, and the poll closed with "Have an Abortion" winning by over 75%. Initially, numbers were marginally in favor of pro-life, but ended up being pro-lulz instead.
Unsurprisingly (and unfortunately), the expectant parents decided to ignore the poll entirely and follow through on giving birth, effectively trolling anyone that wasted time voting. They posted a short but creepy blog entry to inform the world of their decision:
Not a single fuck was given that day. Or ever again.
The Ultrasound
Gallery
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They dubbed their unborn child "Wiggles".
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Would you let this dipshit father have a child?
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psst...hey guys, that baby isn't dead.
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Trolling filthy Christians and /b/tards in one hit... priceless.
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/b/ subtly explains what they think is the appropriate course of action.
See Also
- Shit Nobody Cares About
- Abortion
- Aliza Shvarts
- Pop Parenting
- Angie The Atheist - And she did not need a fucking poll.
- Attention Whore
- Myah Walker - Poll was unanimous.
External Links
- The Poll (Disable cookies in your browser and you can vote multiple times, idiots)
- birthornot
- They have the option to "veto".
- Modern Mom weighs in
- Ministry of Truth's take
Birth or Not is part of a series on Visit the Trolls Portal for complete coverage. |