Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Cigarskunk

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by imported>T K N at 03:21, 1 July 2011. It may differ significantly from the current revision.
Jump to navigation Jump to search
<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Image:Bushsaudkiss.jpg" class="image" title="Cigarskunk wishes he was that raghead"><img alt="Cigarskunk wishes he was that raghead" src="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346im_/http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/thumb/0/06/Bushsaudkiss.jpg/180px-Bushsaudkiss.jpg" width="180" height="133" border="0" class="thumbimage" /></a>
<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Image:Cigarskunk1.jpg" class="image" title="Sean Foltz (Cigarskunk) in his typical non-skunk homosexual appearance. Added by NirvanaNChains22"><img alt="Sean Foltz (Cigarskunk) in his typical non-skunk homosexual appearance. Added by NirvanaNChains22" src="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346im_/http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/thumb/e/e4/Cigarskunk1.jpg/180px-Cigarskunk1.jpg" width="180" height="239" border="0" class="thumbimage" /></a>
Sean Foltz (Cigarskunk) in his typical non-skunk homosexual appearance. <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/User:NirvanaNChains22" class="external text" title="http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/User:NirvanaNChains22" rel="nofollow">Added by NirvanaNChains22</a>

Cigarskunk (real name Sean A. Foltz, age 35) is not your <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Typical" title="Typical">typical</a> <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Conservative" class="mw-redirect" title="Conservative">conservative</a> <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Furry" title="Furry">furry</a>, content to <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Yiff" title="Yiff">yiff</a> away in anonymity whilst secretly <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Raep" class="mw-redirect" title="Raep">dry-humping</a> a copy of Mein Kampf in his mother's bedroom closet whilst sniffing her panties, <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Cutting" title="Cutting">cutting</a> himself, and to put the icing on the <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Cake" class="mw-redirect" title="Cake">cake</a>, dressed in a skunk suit - he is unafraid to actively participate on conservative blogs under his furhandle, and to <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Email" title="Email">email</a> the owner of a veteran's website in order to further an attempt at Swift-Boating <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Barack_Hussein_Osama" class="mw-redirect" title="Barack Hussein Osama">Barack Hussein Osama</a> in time for the general election.

After being approvingly quoted on the ironically-named "Sweetness & Light" wingnut blog, an enterprising commenter on <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Sadly%2C_No%21" title="Sadly, No!">Sadly, No!</a> recognized his furhandle and brought his <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Insane" title="Insane">insanity</a> to the light of the <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Politics" title="Politics">political</a> <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Blogosphere" title="Blogosphere">blogosphere</a>, who promptly <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Lol" title="Lol">lolled</a>.

Like fellow confurrrrvatives <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Jay_Naylor" title="Jay Naylor">Jay Naylor</a> and <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/RHJunior" title="RHJunior">RHJunior</a>, Cigarskunk loves to spout off <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fallacy" class="mw-redirect" title="Fallacy">fallacy</a> about how <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/127273/" class="external text" title="http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/127273/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">doctors kill more people than guns</a>, how <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/129558/" class="external text" title="http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/129558/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">atheists kill more people than religious nuts</a> (See, if you add up all the people killed by that liberal <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Hitler" class="mw-redirect" title="Hitler">Hitler</a> with all the people killed by that liberal <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Stalin" class="mw-redirect" title="Stalin">Stalin</a> and all the <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Abortion" title="Abortion">aborted</a> fetuses in the world = PROFIT) and how <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/135576/" class="external text" title="http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/135576/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">blathering about cigars</a> makes him

some sort of cowboy. Cigarskunk totally knows what he’s talking about, because he has a totally <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Lie" class="mw-redirect" title="Lie">fast-paced and rewarding</a> job at a government welfare office, where he gets to <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/116427/" class="external text" title="http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/116427/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">complain</a> about all the lazy <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Nigger" class="mw-redirect" title="Nigger">niggers</a> and <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Spic" class="mw-redirect" title="Spic">spics</a>. Being a furry, Cigarskunk’s rants are lapped up by the usual sycophants but he’s also got a special following among bat-shit insane <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Christian_furs" class="mw-redirect" title="Christian furs">Christian furs</a>.

Internet tough guy loves skunks, hates niggers

<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Image:CigarSkunk.jpg" class="image" title="Cigarskunk getting recognition from CYD"><img alt="Cigarskunk getting recognition from CYD" src="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346im_/http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/thumb/0/06/CigarSkunk.jpg/180px-CigarSkunk.jpg" width="180" height="267" border="0" class="thumbimage" /></a>
<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Image:Skunkorgy.jpg" class="image" title="See how totally not gay he is? See? See?"><img alt="See how totally not gay he is? See? See?" src="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346im_/http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/thumb/8/83/Skunkorgy.jpg/180px-Skunkorgy.jpg" width="180" height="241" border="0" class="thumbimage" /></a>

Cigarskunk wrote his own <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Unwarranted_self-importance" class="mw-redirect" title="Unwarranted self-importance">Wikifur</a> entry, where he took credit for single-handedly popularizing skunks in the furry community, as if convincing a gaggle of <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Redneck" title="Redneck">mouth-breathing social retards</a> to spank it to a new kind of <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Stinkrat" title="Stinkrat">stinkrat</a> is some sort of accomplishment. He did this by begging artists to draw skunk porn until they caved. Ironically, skunk-fucking is nothing new in the furry fandom, being recognized since the <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Rick_Astley" class="mw-redirect" title="Rick Astley">1980s</a>.<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://furry.wikia.com/wiki/Skunkfucker" class="external autonumber" title="http://furry.wikia.com/wiki/Skunkfucker" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">[1]</a>

He got pwned on <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fchan" title="Fchan">fchan</a> after saying that <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Nigger" class="mw-redirect" title="Nigger">black people</a> are genetically inferior due to <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Incest" title="Incest">inbreeding</a>. Channers retaliated by pointing out that Cigarskunk’s fetishistic love for Tiny Toons character Fifi La Fume indicated a love of <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Pedophilia" title="Pedophilia">kiddie diddling</a>. Cigarskunk erupted into major fagsplosion, <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Crybaby" title="Crybaby">cried the tears of ultimate sadness</a>, then <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fail" title="Fail">proclaimed himself the winner</a> and <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Quitting_IRC_forever" title="Quitting IRC forever">left the board forever</a>. <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/EVAR" title="EVAR">EVAR</a>! (That was of course due to the lack of skunk buttsecks that day)

 
 
Let's put aside political correctness and be realistic for a second here - if Obama loses the general election then there will be race riots - cities will burn and God only knows how many innocents will be hurt and killed. ... So the reality is that Obama HAS to lose the primary because if he doesn't, then thousandss of gallons of inocent blood that will be spilled and the hundreds of billions in property damage will be the responsibility of everyone who supported Obama.
 

 

—<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/379680/#cid:2962464" class="external text" title="http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/379680/#cid:2962464" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Cigarskunk, in this comment</a>

Cigarskunk loves cock

<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Image:Gay_ranchero.jpg" class="image" title="Cigarskunk's very first media appearance"><img alt="Cigarskunk's very first media appearance" src="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346im_/http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/thumb/1/12/Gay_ranchero.jpg/180px-Gay_ranchero.jpg" width="180" height="184" border="0" class="thumbimage" /></a>
 
 
I don't think we can have an intellegent or serious discussion on gay issues until people make up <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Their" class="mw-redirect" title="Their">their</a> minds whether or not its a birth defect or a lifestyle choice.
 

 

—<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/221642/#cid:1656674" class="external text" title="http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/221642/#cid:1656674" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Cigarskunk, in this comment</a>

Because of his <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Neo-con" title="Neo-con">neo-con</a> beliefs, Cigarskunk is unable to come to terms with his repressed homosexuality, instead restricting himself to gooey fantasies about having a <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Cock" title="Cock">long, hard, brown cigar shaft</a> in his mouth. Haha, we kid: Cigarskunk is, of course, completely secure in his <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Heterosexual" title="Heterosexual">heterosexuality</a> as evidenced by the fact that he can’t type more than a sentence without pointing out how <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.furaffinity.net/view/490686/" class="external text" title="http://www.furaffinity.net/view/490686/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">tough</a> he is, how totally straight he is, how much he loves vagina, and how he gets massive amounts of poontang 24/7. You can tell that Cigarskunk is totally NOT trying to compensate for anything because he commissions reams and reams of personalized <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Pornography" class="mw-redirect" title="Pornography">pornography</a> showing his skunk character fucking anything that has a pussy and then demanding that they bake him a pie. Like every real man, Cigarskunk knows that the measure of man’s heterosexuality is his hatred for women, so every picture is chock full of deliciously <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.furaffinity.net/full/624901/" class="external text" title="http://www.furaffinity.net/full/624901/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">jovial misogyny</a>.

Unlike <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Dave_Hopkins" title="Dave Hopkins">Dave Hopkins</a>' strategy of "covering up sexual insecurities by marrying a creature so hideous even he looks good in comparison", Cigarskunk brings <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://furry.wikia.com/wiki/Cigarskunk" class="external text" title="http://furry.wikia.com/wiki/Cigarskunk" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">paid escorts</a> to furrycons to convince fellow <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Furfags" class="mw-redirect" title="Furfags">furfags</a> that he’s a total pimp. Since his highest aspiration in life is showing up the <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fchan" title="Fchan">bottom-of-the-barrel</a> <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Nerds" class="mw-redirect" title="Nerds">nerds</a> that wear collars and neko cat-ears, it should come as no surprise that Cigarskunk’s <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/IRL" title="IRL">real</a> love-life is restricted to fumbled attempted e-rapes on furry forums. Scroll down <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.furaffinity.net/view/481453/" class="external text" title="http://www.furaffinity.net/view/481453/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a> for this particularly spectacular abortion, where his efforts to seduce <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Shemale" title="Shemale">shemale</a> Lilifox via oh-so-sexy action asterisks amount to <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Epic" class="mw-redirect" title="Epic">epic</a> <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fail" title="Fail">fail</a>.

Cigarskunk at one time dated the equally broken furry <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Camwhore" title="Camwhore">camwhore</a> Plush-She, who’s mainly known for jamming <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.tht.net/~tripper/NO/" class="external text" title="http://www.tht.net/~tripper/NO/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">stuffed animals up her cooter</a> and for not bathing.

== My opinion is da truth 'cause I has sick fuck logic and anti-lulz attitude

Here is a list of FurAffinity journals showing that Cigarskunk is a <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Mega_ultra_super_genius" title="Mega ultra super genius">brilliant</a> <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Intellectual" title="Intellectual">intellectual</a> who's opinion is always supported by solid arguments from <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Bullshit" title="Bullshit">serious studies</a> and trustworthy <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Statistics" title="Statistics">stats</a> so he can mesmerize his fellow brainless furfags (geez, all thoze numbrz are blinkin win), cuz he did <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Mathematics" title="Mathematics">mathz</a> at the speshul shkool yeah :

Also, if <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/You" title="You">you</a> post a long (admittedly, <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Tl%3Bdr" class="mw-redirect" title="Tl;dr">tl;dr</a>,) argument showing him how his "<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/God" title="God">God</a>" is a figment of his imagination, or a much more twisted person than he would like to believe, he will retort with a <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/LOL_WUT" title="LOL WUT">two-word response</a> and then block you so you can't spout more of your <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Fact" title="Fact">lies</a>. The main reason for such short responses (according to our scientist) is because he often has a massive cock up his ass that reaches up into his spine paralyzing his hands.

<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/129558/#cid:3111446" class="external text" title="http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/129558/#cid:3111446" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">CS cannot be bothered with facts that he doesn't invent.</a> Also note his belief that <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Hitler" class="mw-redirect" title="Hitler">Hitler</a>, a far-right <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Catholic" title="Catholic">Catholic</a>, was a "<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Atheist" title="Atheist">godless</a> lefty", and his <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Retard" title="Retard">confusing a trillion with a billion</a>.

He has recently taken to posting various right-wing <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Racist" title="Racist">racist</a>/sexist <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/BAWWWWW" class="mw-redirect" title="BAWWWWW">BAWWWWWing</a> and then, when even his fellow furfags call him on it, dismissing it as <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Lie" class="mw-redirect" title="Lie">satire</a>. See also <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Politically_incorrect" title="Politically incorrect">politically incorrect</a>, section 2.

<a name="How_to_cigarskunk"></a>

How to cigarskunk

Yes, now you too can shamelessly imitate everyone's favourite internet confurvative. Here's whatcha gotta do:

The real thing

<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Image:Hello.jpg" class="image" title="What CS lieks to facepaint."><img alt="What CS lieks to facepaint." src="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346im_/http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/thumb/5/5d/Hello.jpg/180px-Hello.jpg" width="180" height="135" border="0" class="thumbimage" /></a>

The reason behind Cigarskunk's huge gallery of commissioned art is that

  1. Just like every other furfag, he can't draw shit.
  2. He is actually so <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Ugly" title="Ugly">ugly</a> no one wants him, not even fags, but since Cigarskunk's <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Lie" class="mw-redirect" title="Lie">straight</a> he won't let another fag fuck/suck him.
  3. He spends all his free time on FA writing <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Over_9000" class="mw-redirect" title="Over 9000">over 9000</a> words a day about <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Shit_nobody_cares_about" title="Shit nobody cares about">how stupid democrats are or why smoking cigars makes him so very Americanly manly.</a>
  4. And again because he often has a massive cock up his ass (you're such a great <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Buttsecks" title="Buttsecks">ass-digger</a> Herbie!) that reaches up into his spine paralyzing his hands.


External links


Cigarskunk is part of a series on  
<a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Furfaggotry" class="mw-redirect" title="Furfaggotry">Furfaggotry</a>       
Visit the <a href="http://web.archive.org/web/20090215175346/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Portal:Furfaggotry" title="Portal:Furfaggotry">Furfaggotry Portal</a> for complete coverage.