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Jack White
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Jack White aka John Anthony Gillis is the ex lead singer of mediocre Indie, Alternative rock band called the White Stripes. The White Stripes are a band that consist of Jack White a 40 year-old hipster and his wife/sister who failed to learn how to tune or play their instruments. They recorded a bunch of cacophonous screaming and indiscriminate drum-bashing to a music video of Legos masturbating and were an overnight success.
White's Humble beginnings & rise to fame
Jack White grew up in shit hole Detroit with his Catholic parents and 10 something or other siblings. He was abused as a child by his father who constantly molested him in front of his brothers and sisters. His mother who was a crack whore sat there and did nothing. She allowed her husband to rape and abuse her children because she was to busy snorting crack and cooking in the kitchen. White having no idea what to do with his life, decided to become a catholic altar boy, probably due to the fact that his father touched his pee pee place so many times before. Life in catholic school didn't work out for him, so he decided to become a rock star when he grew up. That way he would be the one touching other people's junk instead of the other way around.
The White Stripes aka him and his sister playing instruments badly
When Jack decided to become a legend rockstar he began playing instruments (very badly might I add) and joined in a few bands before starting White Stripes with his sister and lover Meg White.
- Discography
- The White Stripes--Their first album was a self titled realize because both Meg and Jack are highly original/creative lol just kidding. They were so lazy that they couldn't think of a better debut album title. This album is nothing but horse shit and no one even cared enough about it, in fact they didn't get famous until their third album's realize. True fact.
—prove that wikipedia doesn't know shit about music, or anything else for that matter. | ||
Instead of listing all of their album's on this article I will just tell you about the specific ones that people know about.
- White Blood Cells--This is the album that got them famous. Basically it was just a video of their's that did it. A video that showed people made of lego parts having sex with each other.
- Icky Thump--Their final album, Icky Thump which I can only assume stands for gay butt sex. Was the most horrid one yet. It was basically just a sad attempt at crossing genres such as country, dad rock and blues. Anyone who likes this album is nothing but a plebe and should be taken out in the dessert to be beaten and left starving to death.
The Dead Weather & other shitty projects by White
The Dead Weather--was/is a stupid ass fuck project by Jack White. It's basically a wannabe super group made up of several members from other shitty rock bands.
- Cast members of The Deadweather include--
- Jack White--Lead singer, drums, writing shitty lyrics while snorting coke in the tour van.
- Alison Mosshart--Bitch whore from the indie band The Kills. She severs the purpose of sucking cock and being the group's token whore.
- Dean Fertita--Some fag from the queer-core band Queens of the Stone Age. He does nothing and no one cares about him.
- Jack Lawrence--The bands punching bag, the only reason why he is in the band, is to make the other band members feel more important and useful to the group. He is Jack's personal butt buddy and takes it in the ass during those long winded tours.
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