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Megaupload

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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This page contains spoilers — important plot secrets and/or conclusions may be revealed. For example,
HOLY SHIT THE FBI CUNTS TOOK MEGAUPLOAD DOWN!1!1!1!1!!!!1
FBI V& notice for MegaUpload as revenge for protesting SOPA.
Exploitable ho! Use it for your own website.

Megaupload is a website you upload copyrighted content for getting internet reputation and appreciation because you have no friends. Megaupload generated billions of dollars from selling you premium accounts and showing you ads while you hold your cock ready for fapping and waiting for the video to start playing.

FBI Ban

On January 19, 2012, immediately following the SOPA blackout protests by sites such as Wikipedia and Reddit, the FBI decided it would be a prime time to terrorize web 2.0 sites by shutting the site down. The shut down of MegaPorn scared the FatASS out of Kim Dotcom which resulted in him giving interviews everywhere to defend himself and locking his doors when FBI came for him.

Public Response

Not a single fuck was given that day. People who want to watch stuff will use torrents or another alternative anyway.

Response From Anonymous

In response, Anonymous DDoS'd them (because that totally will make a long-term difference) and shut down the FBI web site for a while.

The focus on Kim "Dotcom" in the media quickly shifted to pointing out his video game habits, as news media competed to find a scoop.

People of note

Police

  • Grant Wormald: the head cop who shut it all down.
  • Wormald.
    Wormald.
  • A copy of the indictment
    A copy of the indictment

Coolshades

  • Kim Schlitz Schmitz aka Kimble aka Dotcom, the founder and MP3 baron, originally from Germany
  • They stole his artworks
    They stole his artworks
  • U mad?
    U mad?
  • Police pursuit? Kim knows how to deal with it using his chopper.
    Police pursuit? Kim knows how to deal with it using his chopper.
  • Dotcom chilling with his cars and mansion.
    Dotcom chilling with his cars and mansion.
  • You can't handle his juice
    You can't handle his juice
  • Chilling with his shades, owning jets
    Chilling with his shades, owning jets
  • Behind glass
    Behind glass
  • Kim's hawt wife Mona
    Kim's hawt wife Mona

Nigras

  • Alicia Keys (Swizz' waifu)

Others

Megaupload.com employees Bram van der Kolk, also known as Bramos, left, Finn Batato,second from left, Mathias Ortmann and founder, former CEO and current chief innovation officer of Megaupload.com Kim Dotcom (also known as Kim Schmitz and Kim Tim Jim Vestor), right.
  • Megaupload Limited
  • Vestor Limited
  • Finn Batato
  • Julius Bencko
  • Sven Echternach
  • Mathias Ortmann
  • Andrus Nom,
  • Bram Van Der Kolk

Quotes

   
“ 		 
Despite our staff clearly identifying themselves, Mr Dotcom retreated into the house and activated a number of electronic locking mechanisms. While police neutralized these locks he then further barricaded himself into a safe room within the house which officers had to cut their way into.
  		„
  		 

—Detective Inspector Grant Wormald, to New Zealand news outlet TVNZ

   
“ 		 
The indictment goes after six individuals, who between them owned 14 Mercedes-Benz automobiles with license plates such as "POLICE," "MAFIA," "V," "STONED," "CEO," "HACKER," GOOD," "EVIL," and—perhaps presciently—"GUILTY." The group also had a 2010 Maserati, a 2008 Rolls-Royce, and a 1989 Lamborghini. They had not one but three Samsung 83" TVs, and two Sharp 108" TVs. Someone owned a "Predator statue." Motor bikes, jet skis, artwork, and even 60 Dell servers could all be forfeit to the government
  		„
  		 

—ArsTechnica

   
“ 		 
TV news was filled with images of police removing property from Schmitz's home, which he named The Dotcom Mansion. Police seized 18 vehicles, including a vintage pink Cadillac, a Lamborghini, a 2010 Maserati, and 2008 Rolls Royce Phantom with a personalized license plate that reads "God." Some of the other license plates found on the cars read, "Stoned," "Mafia Hacker" and "Guilty."
  		„
  		 

—Cnet

Mona

Mona, Kim's wife preggers with twins, is kept from seeing her three helpless children (aged 19 months, 3 years and 4 years):

   
“ 		 
Although I was obviously pregnant and still in nightclothes, the police told me to go outside and wait on the grass which was wet. They would not let me move. I asked several times to go inside to see the children but was not allowed. It was another 30 minutes before I could see the children, they were all very frightened. The police searched the house with their guns, including where the children's rooms were. The nannies and the children are still nervous and upset after the events of that day.
  		„
  		 

—Mona Dotcom

After the cops took all her money:

   
“ 		 
I do not have any money of my own or access to any other resources. There is no money to pay the nannies and they will be leaving. It is very difficult looking after three children under the age of four years and being pregnant with twins. My husband loved his children and I know he misses them. He is not the man portrayed in the media. He is very much a family man at home. He would always put me and the children first.
  		„
  		 

—Mona Dotcom

Due to the New Zealand/FBI harassment, Mona will probably be forced to give birth in a ditch and miscarry her clone fetuses, and the police will probably sell the three living children into prostitution to buy more ammunition as they gear up for a future assault on FileServe.

Mega Song

Nigga upload, the hit song involving Will.i.am,P Diddy, Kanye West, Chris Brown, Jamie Foxx, Kim Kardashian, Lil John, The Game, Floyd Mayweather, Serena Williams, and Ciara sparked controversy when it was removed due to butthurt after being created on December 9, 2011. Megaupload wanted to countersue UMG and demanded an apology, because they actually had contracts with all of the listed artists. However, YouTube returned the video since everyone mirrored it anyway. (Except for Will.I.Am, according to his lawyers.)

   
“ 		 
Our partners do not have the right to take down videos from YT unless they own the rights to them or they are live performances controlled through exclusive agreements with their artists, which is why we reinstated it.
  		„
  		 

—Youtube

See also

Alternatives

Luckily, many file-sharing sites remain unhit:

Please add any that are missing.

External links

News

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