Bleedingelite

Bleeding cries in a Starbucks after catching his reflection in a spoon and realizing what an emo fag he is.

When Bleeding's plastic surgeon asked him what he wanted his face to look like, he pointed at a picture of Bill Gates.

Bleeding goes into a rage when his internet connection goes down.

One can easily see the squalor and filth of the basement Bleeding lives in. For just $2 a month charitable donation you can help give Bleeding the priceless gift of a vacuum cleaner.

Bleedingelite is a 24 year old basement dweller living in Pittsburg. He is a prominent member of Yahoo's chat-room for the socially maladjusted: Paganism:1. Bleeding finds solace in chatting in the room 'til the wee hours of the morning. He can often be found writing virtual diarrhea until the sun rises and spreads its rays on his zitty face; with its floppy greasy locks that frame his rat-like features. Due to his resemblance to the local pedophile, Bleeding spends most of his life in a chat-room, often complaining about how awful it is, while not doing a thing to either get a real life or a job. Some speculate that Bleeding has agoraphobia since he never leaves the house - but all agree that he was one load his mother should have swallowed.

Chat Room Addiction

As already mentioned, Bleeding has a chat room addiction. This means that he sits in his soiled hot-topic clothes and Blink 182 hoodies complaining about people and whining like an unpaid Vietnamese whore. Since he has no job to speak of, excluding his brief run as a stunt double for Shrek, Bleeding can stay up all night and get up in time for the 5 o'clock news - like a real nigger in life.

Bleeding is frequently found putting the world to rights from his computer chair, something that geeks with no lives are prone to do. He is often able to tell people exactly what is wrong with their lives, to the minutest detail, all the while sitting in a grotty little bedroom surrounded by empty doritos packets, proactiv bottles, and crusty white toilet paper. He almost always complains about the people in the room he frequents, not realizing that he only needs to hit the 'off' button on his computer to leave. With his addiction to chat rooms so powerful and legendary, some theologians theorize that if Bleeding ever left Paganism:1, it would usher in the apocalypse.

Not only is Bleeding an expert on turning underwear inside-out to get more uses when one can't afford a washer, he's also an expert on giving people career and living advice. Experts agree that this is completely normal behaviour for someone who has such a latent case of Asperger's Syndrome.

Appearance

Some have described Bleeding as resembling the lovechild of Daniel Radcliffe, Gollum and Brian Peppers due to his cheap glasses and distinct facial features. He has a skinny weasle face covered in grease which has often been compared to the afterbirth of a cat. During his teenage years, he earned the name that stupid fucking quiche face for his horrendous acne lesions.

With skin as pale as curdled milk, and a forehead like prosthetics from Dawn of the Dead, if you saw Bleeding walking towards you on the street, you would throw your keys at him and run. Luckily, when Boxdude shoves his cock down his throat and pinches his nose, Bleeding pinks up nicely.

Bleeding also has a few ugly tattoos which look like a ballpoint pen shat on his arm. He most likely got these in rebellion to his parents, who never supported him when he used to cut himself with scissors. He is known to visit tattoo and MySpace to flaunt his god-awful 'body art', where he takes blurry pictures of himself posing with his arm out, probably to show to all his pre-pubescent fellow anime fans.

Hobbies

Aside from chatting on the internet so much one would think that the modem was hooked to his veins, watching Hentai geared at adolescent children is also one of Bleeding's favorite hobbies. The bright colours, crazy animation and childish characters all help Bleeding escape from the sad shit-laden pit that is his life.

Links

• His Yahoo Profile - Bleeding's own profile, where you can see his attempts at being 'funny'.
• Anexregtardfromp1 - where Bleeding is pwned on a regular basis.