Church of Zizou

The Church of Zizou, is a cult formed by faggots, a fruit, and moar faggots. They worship teh b3st play3r evar in teh afturweendz, none other, than Zizou the almighty. It was started after an obese faggot found a shitty strategy game called afterwind and spent every waking minute latejoining and raping players.

The story

The story of Zizou's great journey through faggothood, as told by Froot.

"from the depths(debts) of italy rose zizou, a smart child at one month old. Some say he latejoined out of his mother, got extra reinforcements in his brain and zerg rushed life itself. At the age of 2 he learned to crawl, this was his favorite strategy until the age of 5 when he learned to play video games. Video games wasn't as popular a strategy as it is now, but many people were loyal to it. When he got older he purchased his first computer with all the sp he saved up - this was to be the computer where history was made. He got right on and began looking for games - He found one, it was by the name of diplomacy that was played on a forum. He was master of this game, many people quit playing. He would join late and get all the victories; this gave him many SP in which he could purchase upgrades. On the first day of AW amok and ivan sat looking at their glorious creation, not knowing of the sheer power that it was destine for. Zizou with his triple screen computer(to latejoin 3 times) he bought with his SP created his account, not having the alias of zizou yet he thought of a name. The most glorious name was thought of, zizou. He was so happy to have gotten such a great name he jumped right into the game - He saw many other new players and amok and ivan as they taught the new players to play. Zizou knew best and was the strategy game master; He needed no tutorial! Zizou waited for these training games to start, and joined week 9 right next to their capital.

He is good at the maths..

Zizou was known as the cyprus crusader. He lead the land for as long as he could..but the community rose up; they chose a false prophet by the name of ironail! Zizou saw this...he was angered "the damned fools" proclaimed zizou as he smashed his dinner his mother had just brought down to the basement. He cried out for his mother to bring more and called her an idiot, she cried as well from upstairs. Ironail was the best, he had started a new trend of 5k eurasia! Zizou was even more angered by this as it hard to latejoin..how could you afford the bombers?!?! Zizou continued waring ironail for first, there was seemingly no end to this war. Zizou challenged ironail to a duel, he was forced to accept due to his pride and honor. Zizou acted like he disconnected, left the game and reconnected. It was turn 9; ironail being the honorable person he is waited for him without making a move. Zizou abused this and sent hundreds of bombers at ironail, ironail spammed walls but it was too late ..zizou had defeated him. Zizou was once more number one - a time of peace had fallen on this land once more. Upon becoming first he gave unto AW two gifts; instant joining and bigger color ion. The community rejoiced, but felt so empty...ironail was the most honorable but zizou held the crown for number one. In light of the situation zizou gave them more gifts - Scenarios, an edit to his favorite strategy lucky bastard and a nerf to PD. The community began to like zizou, in fact they began to worship him. Grand vizier Fruit erected the church of zizou in the following weeks, and for this we owe him tons of rep. Thank you for reading our holy tale, may zizou bring you peace."

Zizou's true form.

His Decline

 Sadly, however, the Great Lord Zizou began to play less and less, until it was a rare and happy day when his name was even on the SP chart. However, this did not stop His followers of the Great Church of the Holy Lord Zizou from worshiping him; and it did not stop them from warring. One of his more homo-gay followers Gardevoir formed The Entente after several coalition failings, as Fruit did as well. And, with this, his followers trolled each other into infinity and warred as well.

See also

• Faggot
• Black Jesus
• Furry
• DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS
• Gardevoir
• Retard
• God
• AtWar

[Close them downOpen the records]

Church of Zizou is part of a series on Cults