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HowToBasic
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FACT ALERT: This faggot is too chicken-shit to show his face. |
HowToBasic is an anonymous, psychopathic, egg-wasting manchild that violently throws/smashes food for other people's pleasure. That is, if you were autistic enough to take in such cringe-worthy content. In nearly all of his videos, he is naked (presumably to attract the extreme homosexuals). He loves to slap meat against his legs, smash eggs, heavily moan, fists more meat down the toilet, piss in his food then eats it, and shit on the ground. How Google allows this jack-off to be on YouTube and doesn't allow less mature content is still a mystery to this very day, but experts speculate that this sorry excuse of a tutor makes Google at least 10,000 dollars a month. HowToBasic utterly proves that only women should be in the kitchen, and if a man enters it, there is no telling of what sort of catastrophe will unfold.
Origins
HowToBasic proves that the sad pathetic individuals who watch this talentless Youtube channel really will watch anything that is not even remotely amusing. It has been rumored that at one point this massive faggot used to upload videos that somewhat resembled horrendous how-to tutorials for those who were dumb enough not to figure it out for themselves. The only problem? All those who watched said "tutorials" soon developed terminal cancer. Thus, these tutorials have since fallen into the void of obscurity. In order to reduce the amount of time and effort, these so-called tutorials became increasingly short, uninteresting, and boring, much like your sex life. These 'basic' tutorials included: how to pick up an umbrella, how to open a door, and how to fuck raw food. HowToBasic realized how many idiots there are on the internet, so he decided to make more of this absurd nonsense. However, he knew that it would get old really fast. So to stay relevant, he became a complete douche and did what he does today: waste tons of food (quite literally) by throwing and/or smashing it, perhaps try to compensate for all the times he was raped as a young boy. Or he could just have an intense food-sex fetish. Let's hope we never find out.
Repetition
HowToBasic is also notorious for using nearly the same formula and still not being amusing at all. As if he couldn't already make anyone want to shoot themselves repeatedly in the head, he lacks such originality and creativity it makes your drunken grandmother look somewhat attractive.
If you ever happen to watch these despicable smears of feces in cesspool that is Youtube, please be on the look out for the following:
- An egg being flung violently at anything really
- Heavy moans, as if during sexual intercourse
- Saying "shhhhhhh", as if he was raping the body of his dead sister
- Using sausage to compensate for his small dick
- Shitting on the floor
- Putting bodily parts into the toilet for no apparent reason
- Slapping food against his knee, feet, or anywhere on his lower body to perhaps make himself get a boner
- Violently patting anything
- Fingering food like he wishes to finger his own anus
Videos
- An insightful video of how to install GTA on your laptop.
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External Links
See Also
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