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Billy Joel
Billy Joel (Or William Martin Joel you fucking creeps) is an atheistic washed up hack who made too much music. He has Alzheimers now and regularly shits his pants but he still gets all the bitches at the nursery home, especially my mom. He is the god of publicity stunts, and fuck Snoop Dogg he ain't got shit on Billy muthafuckin Joel other than a semblence of relevancy after the 1980s. He wrote a wide variety of songs, and still performs them to this day despite needing a video prompter for his lyrics because that's how forgetful he is. He is NOT to be mistaken with Elton John the knighted and vastly superior musician, ever.
As a young boy he grew up in some shithole nobody cares about and was blastin' CO2 straight up his anus. He was part of a band or some shit but then went off to make his own music after a vicious gang rape. This led to several songs that nobody gave a shit about, like "Movin' Out" or "She's Got a Dick" and "Oh God What The Fuck I Just Came Inside A Dude."
He had several tours, the most notably is when he went to Russia to teach them about democracy and why you should buy his music. The Russians captured him and slapped his butthole because they weren't used to rock and roll. They ended up liking his ear rape and then patted him on the back before sucking his dick.
Elton Jogn fucked up a verse when they where playing "Piano Man" on that Jay Leno show. "It's 9 o' clock on a Saturday, the regular crowd shuffles in. The manager says it's been me you've been coming to see to forget about life for a while!" This proves that Elton really is a gay homo.
Love Life
Billy fucked some hoes and slapped asses.
His first relationship was with your mom and he fucked her on your bed.
He married Crusty Blinky and then divorced her when he found out that she was fucking some porn addict behind his back. She got slapped and called a "bitch mcnugget" by Billy and told to go to bed.
Elton John had a one sided relationship with Billy Joel, and was part of the inspiration of ""Oh God What The Fuck I Just Came Inside A Dude." by Billy.
See also
External links
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Billy Joel is part of a series on Visit the Music Portal for complete coverage. |