Uriel

Uriel is an irrelevant lolcow who had long since been milked by the masses. You can help by finding someone else to pick on, you meen-spirited cyberboolie!

	“	"Chief philosophical adviser, rambler and critic."	„
	—Uriel on himself

Uriel was a 30 year old Spanish "philosopher and entrepreneur". He sucked Rob Pike's dick like no other man could.

If it has features, its harmful

He was the creator of cat-v.org, his personal site where he went on about bullshit nobody cared about like how every piece of software with features is "harmful". Full to the brim with edgy quotes.

He was also a member of Suckless, a community where nerds go to circlejerk about outdated shit like Unix and Plan 9.

After "suffering for some time" Uriel considered himself harmful and an heroed.

Despite being a Plan 9 autist he hypocritically ran "Linux on a fairly recent thinkpad".