GaijinSmash

A picture of Jeff, as drawn by a 47 year old man

GaijinSmash is a website written by an American man named Jeff, who moved to Japan to teach the lolis English. It's a well known fact that Japanese people can't learn English, so a large percentage of his stories are centered around their Engrish. Also, all of his students, male or female, are totally gay for his cock and are constantly trying to touch it.

As of June 2010, the site has been relocated to Wordpress and the original GaijinSmash domain is now owned by some German guy. The site is now called "Gaijin Chronicles"

Where is he now?

The site originally was hosted on Azrael's own site. It was in order and listed by date so people could follow the story and know when it happened. Then suddenly he shut it down and told everyone it's moved. After moving it, he put everything in random order, doesn't give the date it happened, and now he'll post something that happened 5 years ago and people think it happened last thursday. His new posts are often him taking all his old stories, putting them in a bot, and then the bot spits out randomly generated content from the old stories. Supposedly he left Japan years ago, but nobody knows for sure.

The Kancho

A Kancho is the act of sticking your fingers in someone's ass for the lulz. Usually practiced by Japanese 13 year old boys, Mr. Jeff's kids decided to try it on him, and often. While he routinely denies it, he mentions this as a rather unpleasant experience. Several of his students often tried to grab his dick.

	“	The boy in front of me had become a K-1000, or even a K-X - a perfect, lethal kanchoing machine. He will stop at nothing until his mission, to poke me in the ass or grab my dick, is complete.	„
	—Requiem For a Legacy - Part I

	“	I can't tell you who got what or what got hit or how many times. I don't know how many of you have been in a position where 6-7 Japanese boys are grabbing your dick and sticking fingers up your ass simultaneously (show of hands?), but in that situation, you are only aware that you are being violated. I assume they got me good, but I honestly just don't know. Maybe my mind is blocking it out, and it'll take years of intensive therapy and thousands of Kleenex tissues to finally dredge it up again.	„
	—Requiem For a Legacy - Part III

Grabbin some loli tits

The Infamous Octopus

It wasn't long before Jeff managed to trick a 12 year old Japanese boy back to his apartment, where he dressed him up in pretty clothes and called him his (now ex-) girlfriend. Let's call him Roberta.

One evening, Jeff and Roberta were sitting on Steve's couching, fooling around as any normal Daddy/Son couple would when Roberta agreed to give Steve the most amazing (and possibly only) blow job of his life. Roberta went through the motions, but decided to add a twist, hoping it would earn him a few hours of not being chained to a radiator. He slipped in a little move of his own, named The Octopus.

No one is really sure what The Octopus is. One can only imagine it involved both hands, a foot and some carpet nails. A cat is fine, too, in some provinces. Either way, Steve ended up with a torn dick. TORN DICK! He went to the Emergency room and from there the story spread across Japan. Or, maybe it didn't. Either way, TORN DICK!

TORN DICK!

Needless to say Roberta is dead now.

Links

• Gaijin Chronicles
• Outpost Nine