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Tsukihime
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is the current revision of this page, as edited by imported>JuniusThaddeus at 12:32, 1 July 2016. The present address (URL) is a permanent link to this version.
Revision as of 12:32, 1 July 2016 by imported>JuniusThaddeus
This page contains spoilers — important plot secrets and/or conclusions may be revealed. For example, HOLY SHIT TSUKIHIME IS THE ORIGINAL TWILIGHT!!!!1
Tsukihime (which means "Lunar Princess" in moonspeak) is a Japanese Visual Novel which was later turned into a manga which was later turned into an anime which hardcore fanbois would prefer not to talk about because it fucking sucked. It has a lead female vampire who isn't a bitch or a Mary Sue, making it the most awesome vampire story ever written.
Akiha Tohno - Shiki Tohno's flat chested, jealous as fuck step-sister who wants to fuck him and furiously hates any bitches who try to get close to him. She also drinks blood from her maid's tits, acts like a stuck up moralfag and has an even more fucked up actual brother.
SHIKI Tohno - Akiha's actual brother (and yeah, his first name is really in ALL CAPS). Basically the crazy fuck of an entire family of goddamned lunatics, except this guy is what happens when you're born with demon blood, you lose control, your daddy locks you away, you wind up the reincarnation of a vampire who just won't fucking die because of some reincarnation bullshit (or not, some story arcs don't have this shit), you get tortured by the same maid your daddy has been raping to bleed off his own bugfuck craziness, and then you find out your sister wants to fuck some miserable cunt who was adopted into your family to replace your sorry ass.
Arcueid Brunestud: Hot vampire lady who is kinda-sorta-but-maybe-not-actually the last of her kind. Her powers are mighty, and spinoff appearances imply she has the power to control time and space. This is a totally original idea and totally not ripped off from Doctor Who
Ciel: Catholic girl who can't die. Totally not the inspiration for Jack Harkness in Torchwood. The Catholic Church murderised her daily a few months just to make sure, Don't worry. It's just strawberry jam. but eventually employed her.
Kohaku: One of the two maids of the Tohno household. Comes across as an overly cheerful redhead on the surface, but she's really broken and emotionally screwed up because Akiha's daddy raped the shit out of her for years, and she's angry, pissed, and planning on killing everyone, then herself. Has a fetish for syringes and torturing people for the lulz.
Hisui: Kohaku's sister, and the other maid of the household. Has the emotional range of a redheaded coffee cup and is so horrible at cooking Shiki actually used his killing powers once to stab a fucking hamburger to kill whatever the hell she did to make reek of fail and AIDS.
Storyline
Shiki murders Arcueid because he has SUPER AWESOME DEMON DETECTING ABILITIES (A small dick) and runs away, Arcueid gets mad after she regenerates, but falls in love with him while waiting for him to return so she can RIP HIS FUCKING THROAT OUT.
Aww, look! The vampire and the Catholic girl are BONDING!
Badness happens. Shiki has buttsex with a Catholic girl because the ultimate evil is living in his dick. Or something.
This isn't actually a sex scene. THEN WHY DO YOU CLOSE THE DOOR WHENEVER YOU WATCH IT?
The fanbase
Outside Japan, Tsukihime is mostly known to people who played the fan translation of the original VN, which took over 9000 years to complete because the game is longer than Lord of the Rings. The fan translators helpfully included an option to disable the scenes of buttsex, incest, and rape. Which was appreciated by 12 year olds and christfags.