Encyclopedia Dramatica:Article of the Now/February 1, 2024

Ahmad Al Aliwi Al-Issa

Ahmad Al Aliwi Al-Issa'^☪ (a.k.a. Assmed, Achmed, and Osama bin Bullied) is a prime example of a rare breed of neckbeard; the rag-headed neckbeard (sometimes referred to as the brown-crested cell phone bomber). He decided to prove how cool he was to all of his bullies by shooting up a fucking King Soopers grocery store in Boulder, Colorado, as if murdering bored strangers at random while they wonder which flavor of Hot Pockets they want to take home will somehow ease your crybaby hurty feels. Why he didn't simply become a serial killer and slowly murder his high school bullies one by one over the course of several years so as to not get caught, like a proper edgelord, we will never know. Instead we got a whiny spaz shooting a bunch of old ladies while they were buying a fresh batch of Depends and denture cream at their local supermarket. That'll show 'em, Achmed!

But wait, there's more! It gets much weirder and funnier, we promise! Read on, fellow fags!

(( In A Mighty Scream The Rag Head Cried Out "Alahu Akbar," But Didn't Have The Balls To Earn That Golden iPod For Himself ))

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