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INTERNET HATE MACHINE

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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INTERNET HATE MACHINE v1.0
How Internets gets turned into Hate v2.0

This article is now OBSOLETE. Please refer to Twilight Appreciation Station.

 
Typical hate machine operator.
 
Powered by HATE
 
INTERSTATE HATE MACHINE

Creator of all the internet drama.

An Internet Hate Machine™ is a device somewhat akin to a Dalek used by gangs of hackers (who sometimes use steroids) in pursuit of their lulz. These machines are able to run on a wide variety of fuels such as semen, baby blood, seven different passwords, Mudkips, faggot tears, urine, jenkem, and pure lulz. The INTERNET HATE MACHINE, like everything else in the world, is produced by Microsoft.

   
 
Here to sacrifice,

infernal hate device,

Satan's go-between,

kneel and die before the Internet Hate Machine!
 


 
 

—Wise poet on the Internet Hate Machine.

   
 
The images should make you scream,

but, desensitised, you roll some weed,

jerking off to what you've seen,

A product of the Hate Machine.
 


 
 

Things that happen when you feed the INTERNET HATE MACHINE

 

 

 

 

 

COPYPASTA LAWL - TL;DR

Internet Hate Machine has had his say, and this is mine. If you disagree with my claim that the trouble with such crotchety franions is that they intend to impose tremendous hardships on tens of thousands of decent, hard-working individuals, then read no further. But being a generally genteel person, however, I always bite my tongue. Should you think I'm saying too much, please note that he keeps telling us that he defends the real needs of the working class. Are we also supposed to believe that the best way to reduce cognitive dissonance and restore homeostasis to one's psyche is to impose a one-size-fits-all model on how society should function? I didn't think so.

Internet may have the right to threaten the common good. He may have the right to break the mind and spirit, castrate the character, and kill the career of anyone whose ideas he deems to be cheeky. But Internet crosses the line when he uses his bully pulpit to diminish society's inducements to good behavior. Every time he gets caught trying to start wars, ruin the environment, invent diseases, and routinely do a hundred other things that kill people, he promises he'll never do so again. Subsequently, his disciples always jump in and explain that he really shouldn't be blamed even if he does, because, as they maintain, paternalism is the key to world peace. Now, it is not my purpose to suggest that we can't just sit around and do nothing, but rather to weaken the critical links in his nexus of lexiphanicism-oriented vandalism. I correctly predicted that Internet would pour a few drops of wormwood into our general enthusiasm. Alas, I didn't think he'd do that so effectively - or so soon. And now, to end with a clever bit of doggerel: United we stand. Divided we fall. Internet Hate Machine's slimy ultimata will destroy us all.

Scientology vs. The Internet Hate Machine

Still licking their wounds from continuous IRL beatings, everyone's favorite cult held a summit meeting to discuss "internet hate." In other words, their inability to get Anonymous hung for treason has resulted in the Church starting a campaign to have the internet unplugged for good. Which, all things being equal, would probably be best. Unfortunately for the Church, no one cares. Especially since L. Ron Hubbard was a twat anyway...oh well! Let's drink to stringing up some Scientologists!!1!!one1

One Final Crime

A crappy punk band from Ausfagia called "One Final Crime" made a song called Internet Hate machine. Unfortunately, they don't know how to use Windows Movie Maker, or how to record a decent song for that matter.

Gallery

Do not see also

 
INTERNET HATE MACHINE
is part of a series on
Fox News

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INTERNET HATE MACHINE is part of a series on

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Visit the Memes Portal for complete coverage.