Ticks on dick

On May 8th, 2010, a male person had a brilliant idea while taking a nice stroll through a park (probably on the lookout for raep). While he was zig-zagging his way through, the ticks that stuck on his clothes made his needle-dick harder than the difficulty at which John McClane dies, so why not fap with ticks on yo dick? Surely, having a dick the size of a midget turd would only make it easier to receive a blowjob from a tick. With a plastic cup, this fat fucktarded dick-tick potential an hero collected the ticks on his clothes and brought them home for some nice champagne and faggotry.

mmmm insecx on mah pen0r

File:Ticks-on-dick1.jpg

WHY?! WHY?!

Camera + Dickticks = OMGWTF

Like any other sick depraved fat bastard, he decided to share his love story with the rest of the world through the only community that would take him seriously, 4chan & the /b/tards. This led to epic lulz and a resounding OMG WAT?! throughout the internetz. Newfags and oldfags united to see this marvel that was Mr. Ticks on Dick aka. Tickdick aka. Turd-dick. Totally oblivious to the fact that ticks can give you cock-rot, he opened up his all-you-can-suck buffet to a cup o' dickdrainers, likely as hungry as an African kid with the munchies.

Questions that still remain unanswered:

• Why is he so fat?
• Why doesn't he put them on his balls?
• How about a rimjob from a tick?

Future Prospects

Just when everyone thought it couldn't get worse, Mr. Ticks on Dick spoke out to the pale pasty-skinned ITGs out there giving the fapping hordes of insectophiles something to look forward to:

	“	I thought about trying for leeches but dont know how to catch them, I live in Sacramento area.	„

	“	I want to do mosquitoes and definitely an assassin bug!!	„

	“	massive piercing mouth parts!!!!	„

	“	any other blood suckers I'm missing?	„

He also uploaded a video of himself applying the ticks which can currently be downloaded from here.

Gallery

• 
  Older than the other pics here, but relevant.
• Preparing for the WTFMAN!!
  Preparing for the WTFMAN!!
• 
  Almost as big as the small container I used to get my sticky hands from.
• 
  Beginning of application process.
• 
  Ah.. She hungers.
• 
  Now for her sister.
• 
  Displaying impressive size of manhood...
• 
  Calm down lady-bugs, plenty to go around.
• 
  Tick stuck on the penis wrinkle.
• 
  Yep, they are still on there.
• 
  Lower light really brings out the lymes.
• 
  Blinding light so they don't see they are on a troll dick.
• 
  Stretched to increase blood flow to hungry ticks... or something like that.
• 
  If you look closely, you can see the raised skin of where their burrowed mouth-parts have pierced and wriggled around.
• 
  Once spring comes around and the ticks show up, we'll get a part 2.

See Also

• Dick Ants

Ticks on dick is part of a series on Sex Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage.