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Afr0blu3

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Afr0Blu3, moar liek Afr0Bitch3, amirite? (Powerword: Sam Webster) is a one of Asalieri's many tag alongs. This completely un-noteworthy member of the fat man's troupe has his own little YouTube review series where his monotonous tone and uninteresting diatribes devolve into boredom enough to make any viewer consider shotgun mouthwash. If you should ever happen across his videos, know that you have found the most boring person alive.

Afr0Blu3, member of Asalieri's e-Mob.

He believes he can show the likes of AVGN "the proper path" by being British, having a stiff upper lip, and showing people the "proper and respectable way" to vlog on YouTube about games, comics, and why YouTube should be paying him more money for his quality reviews.

Asalieri's Butt Buddy

 
Blu3i3's depiction of Mr. Gaede versus how the man looks IRL.

In a series on Asalieri's channel called A Brit Abroad, Afr0Blu3 can be seen hanging out with tubby for a straight two weeks. These guys are so unlikable that they actually have to fly to hang out with someone. Naturally, lulz ensued as the two Z-List YouTubers tried pathetically to convince those unfortunate enough to happen upon their videos that they were really cool guys to hang out with! Instead they just proved that they're socially awkward and both have superiority complexes.

Afr0's commitment was further displayed during the JFreedan incident Asalieri was involved in, where Afr0Blu3 made some cutting remarks about Carey Martell (resulting in his only video to ever be semi-popular) before showing his true colours in removing the video the second Martell got angry, claiming him and Martell were able to discuss the matter like adults and come to a mutually beneficial conclusion.

He also did an episode of Asalieri's RAR wherein he took shots at Linkara of TGWTG. This spilled out in the TGWTG forums where Afr0 says he, again, had a mature and adult discussion about it. In actuality, Linkara blew away all of this cretin's points and proceeded to ignore him from there on out.

"I Have A Great Life!"

Blu3 seems to delight in mentioning how is life is supposedly so-fucking-fantastic. He'll regularly talk about a non-existent degree in Games Art & Design when trying to validate his half-assed, yet remarkably long-winded opinions. He has mentioned a girlfriend, yet is a clear example of why British men are considered fags. This "woman" has never appeared on camera because of shyness. In reality, even Bubba does not want to appear in a video before cleaning this limp-wristed nerd's shit off their dick.

After years of having his shit pushed in, our hero finally managed to push out an 8-pound compacted turd, wrapped it in a pink onesie, and declared that Baby Blu3 had finally arrived.

   
 
With regards to the real job comment, I have my 35 hour working week that keeps a roof over my head and food on the table, don't you worry about that.
 

 
 

—Not realizing that no one was worried.

The Reviews Are In

There are signs the guy desperately wants to be part of a more popular ring of YouTubers, even dropping a very unsubtle comment about appearing as a guest on the Hate Bit Podcast comment box, and constantly licking Joey Roo (Clan of the Gray Wolf) and Brian Lee's (Game Anthropologist) asses. He persists that his complete lack of views comes from the fact that he's not widely known and that people aren't interested in integrity anymore. He could just face the fact that his content blows.

   
 
Aww, didn't make the line up
 

 
 

—Sad because he is not important enough to be roasted.

Afr0Blu3's furious critiques, include such thrilling information as the quality of the cases for those games he recently purchased, the price he paid for them, and even up to 8 minutes of other material you will never consider watching.

WARNING: Before you watch these, make sure your gun is loaded and play solo Russian Roulette.

Somehow, he continues to keep viewers enthralled.

What Fans Are Saying

   
 
Your just greedy. You should make videos out of love not just to line your pockets. Youtube doesn't owe you a living in the least. If you really think your videos are that good why don't you try selling them and see how far that gets you. Or try getting a real job and stop moaning.
 

 
 

—BENJI LEWIS, telling it like it is.

   
 
Almost at 100 videos, got anything planned?
 

 
 

—MatrixEvolution17, wondering if anything interesting will come along.

   
 
Had no idea you were back down. Should pay more attention in future.
 

 
 

—Geronimo2705, even friends cannot pay attention.

   
 
Is the boner really necessary?
 

 
 

—richiebeebe, scarred for life.

The Fight for YouTube Rights

Afr0Blu3 is a prolific YouTube vlogger, having posted over 100 videos. After finally achieving a record-breaking 74,000 channel views, he naturally became enraged when Steve Chen would not accept the majority of his submissions to the YouTube partner program. Not realizing that a paltry 740 views per upload likely cost Google more money than it brought in, Afr0blu3 went on the offensive with a series of videos more horrific than his reviews.

It won't belong before mouth-breathing windbags from across the internet rally behind the Patron Saint of Boredom and demand they reach $100 in ad revenue quicker without needlessly creating something worth watching.

Links

See Also

 

Afr0blu3 is part of a series on YouTube.

Visit the YouTube Portal