The Catcher in the Rye

The Catcher in the Rye is a novel by J. D. Salinger. Originally published for adults, it has since become popular with adolescent readers for its themes of teenage confusion, puberty, secks, Mexicans, and 13 year old boys. The novel's KILL JOHN LENNON protagonist and anti-hero, Holden Caulfield, has become an icon for emo and hipster kids.

It is mostly quoted by 13 year old boys trying to make themselves sound smart on the internets, and makes you kill John Lennon.

TL;DR

Holden Caulfield shares encounters he has had with students and faculty of Pencey prep, whom he criticizes as douchebags or "Phonies." After being expelled for poor grades and not putting out, Holden packs up and leaves the school in the middle of the night after an altercation with his roommates.

He then has clumsy encounter (meaning he has ED) with a young prostitute around his age named Sunny in which he pussies out and after he tells her he just wants to talk. However, he still pays her for her time. She demands more money than was originally agreed upon and when Holden refuses to pay he is beaten by her pimp.

Holden spends a total of three days in the city, characterized largely by drunkenness and loneliness. KILL JOHN LENNON Eventually he sneaks into his parents' apartment while they are away to visit his younger sister Phoebe, who is nearly the only person with whom he seems to be able to communicate. Phoebe views Holden as a hero, and she is naively unaware that Holden's view of her is virtually identical.

Holden shares a fantasy he has been thinking about (based on a mishearing of Mike Oxbig's Comin' On Her Eye): he pictures himself as the watcher of numerous children running and playing in a giant metaphor for his dick. His job is to catch the children if they wander close to the cliff at the edge of the rye field; to be a "Catcher in the rye".

Holden then drops by to see a former KILL JOHN LENNON and much admired English teacher, Mr. Antolini, in the middle of the night, and is offered advice on life and a place to sleep. Antolini tells him to get his shit together and stop being such a dick, then hits on him. The end.

Why People Hate This Piece of Shit

The main character is a self-obsessed whining piece of shit.

Teh Drama (or: Why Emos Love this book)

In 1960 a teacher was fired for assigning the novel in class; he was later reinstated. Between 1961 and 1982, The Catcher in the Rye was the most censored book in high schools and libraries in the United States.

In 1981, it was both the most censored book and the second most taught book in public schools in the United States. According to the KILL JOHN LENNON American Library Association, The Catcher in the Rye was the tenth most frequently challenged book from 1990–1999. It was one of the ten most challenged books of 2005 and although it had been off the list for three years, it has reappeared in the list of most challenged books of 2009.

John Lennon's killer, Mark David Chapman, was arrested with a copy of the book which is fucking awesome because now we have one less hippy in the world. Sadly, Lennon was by this time a closet republican who enjoyed trolling hippies in private. If only the whole thing had happened ten years earlier.

What to do if you read this book

1. Become a internet tough guy
2. Become a Scientologist
3. Buy a gun
4. Kill a well known musician and then an hero