Illemonati

This article is about some faggotry on ED that happened in the days of yore. Clicking the external links may lead you to Satan's playground.

This is what we assumed to be BeatlesLover. We were wrong.

A bunch of lowlife ED vandals. Although BeatlesLover started the attacks, he only made three edits that could be considered vandalism. Other users, such as Ontac, blanked many pages in a cheap and horribly thought out attempt to destroy the Encyclopedia Dramatica. After pestering ED with their petty vandalism attacks, they became too overconfident and left this message on Thedreadedkettle's userpage:

Dear Mr. Kettle. Of course it\'s me again. Actually it is a select group of the Illemonati who have decided that this website must be destroyed. No, we are not going to tell you what the Illemonati are, as I\'m sure you could arrange for a swift retribution, and we surely don\'t want your type desecrating our forum. We are using proxies, so banning won\'t do much. In conclusion, I would like to say, DIAF j00 fucking moron. Thanks. ~Ontac

This was mentioned in IRC where the term 'illemonati' was made fun of as a supposed typo. Then Mr. Kettle searched for this term and got a wiki with almost no content. Here the user page of BeatlesLover was found. Sheneequa then used her wikiskillz to check the history and find an IP used back in March and saw this was the same as the CheckUser IP from July 1st.

A WHOIS later showed BeatlesLover is from Kutztown University, and a further google for more info showed the Lemon Demon forums on page 3. Here the random forum was clicked and a '14 reasons to destroy ED' topic was near the top. The topic had 5 pages of people saying "OMG THEY INSULTED NOUN!" The group later experienced troll's remorse when they realized how pointless it was to vandalize such a lulzy wiki.

Facts about Illemonati

• Every Illemonati member has been diagnosed with a mental disorder. This is believed to be one of two requirements for becoming a member. The other one is being a 15-year-old boy.
• Illemonati did WTC
• They worship Neil Cicierega, aka Lemon Demon
• THEY CAN'T STOP VANDALIZING, MAN!!
• They think vandalizing a wiki will destroy it. Which explains why Wikipedia isn't around anymore.

Known Illemonati

BeatlesLover

Me be BeatlesLover! I’m a 15-year-old semi-sociopath who needs a life. Typically, I listen to classic rock...

Ontac

Well, my name’s Christopher Walken and I’m 15. I’m a Canadian living in Calfornia, so my friends tend to call me Canada… they’re not to original. Lemon Demon was really what got me into music. I’m an insomniac (I’m writing this at 1:13 in the morning) and I’m very obsessive. If I get into something I will go to far.

• Your mom
• Jesus
• Satan
• Any nonsensical username created on the 2nd of July 2006

See also

• Detective
• Illemonparty
• Internet jail
• Canadia an article complained about.
• Vandal

Illemonati be here, YARRR!!!

• Archived forum topic wherein is discussed ED's glorious downfall (and how the Beatles are so totally sweet):
  • Page 1
  • Page 2
  • Page 3
• BeatlesLover on their little wiki BALEETED!

Featured article July 2, 2006
Preceded by Timecube	Illemonati	Succeeded by Spellcheck