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Dr. Seuss

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Theodor Seuss Geisel
"I LOVE GREEN EGGS AND HAM!"
"Hop on Pop" at work
"Mr.Brown Can Moo" the movie
Seuss's most popular work

Dr. Seuss, or Theodor Seuss Giesel, was a children's book author. During WW2, he spent his time creating over 9000 political cartoons. Unfortunately, they weren't good enough to earn him any awards. During the sixties his wife became sick and, after reading Green Eggs and Ham, killed herself. Seuss failed to care and, less than a year later, remarried someone better and continued writing.

Seuss never wanted an amusement park made after his books. Fortunately for his wife, Seuss got owned by Cancer in the 90's and, quickly after, she signed on with Universal to make Seussland. To this day, she whores money off this crappy little park.

Literature

His droning rhyme scheme and idiotic phrases merged with other art forms of the time, and the one thing that could make god cry was a direct result. Some of his books include:

  • Green Eggs and Ham: Sam doesn't want to eat the Green Eggs and Ham. So the bitch is tied down and forced to eat it. Suprisingly, he likes it. Sadly, NOBODY CARES. This book is popular among fat kids who will eat anything.
  • The Cat in the Hat: A registered sex offender furry comes around and rapes the kids up the ass for the lulz, the mom comes home and walks in on them, and she got scared, and said you're moving with your auntie and uncle in Bel-air.
  • How the Grinch Stole Christmas: About a green Jew who steals Christmas presents.
  • Hop on Pop: A book with instructions and methods for on how to kick the shit out of defenseless old men. Banned in libaries that have Old people working there (95%).
  • Fox in Socks: Pictures of Fox News cast members in nothing but red socks.
  • Oh, the Thinks You Can Think!: Encourages kids to use their imagination. This book is said to have inspired Michael Jackson's gradual sex change and the Jews to plan and carry out 9/11.
  • Mr. Brown Can Moo! Can You?: Mr.Brown, a slave, is taught how to speak like a cow while living on a plantation. This book is based on a true story.
  • I Am NOT Going to Get Up Today!: A book written by Seuss when he felt lazy as shit. He laid in bed and wrote about how life sucks, and he doesn't feel like working. Then he got the rant published.

Movies

"Kids love Austin Powers in Cat form!"

"Dr. Seuss Bible"

Rule 34

People who like these books

Links