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Fellatio
—J. Edgar Hoover |
The opposite of anal sex. Fellatio is a Latin word, which means "the act of sucking cock". Your Mom does this really well, but your dad needs more practice.
It's also A character in William Shakespeare's The Tempest. Not to be confused with Bond villain henchman, Oddjob (unless that was one of those "odd jobs" he was named after).
Texas Republicans have introduced a law to outlaw gay sex and sodomy. Problem is, sodomy includes fellatio and therefore all blowjobs would be illegal in Texas which ironically would make Texas the gayest state in the Union.
Technique
Explanation on how to get head--written by the expert!
- Get her really drunk
- ????
- Get her to suck your dick!
The Variation, popular with self injury folk:
- While she is sucking, tell her that you will rape her.
- She will at this point bite your penis off.
- Awesome!.
Gay head
Gay head is different because you do not have to get any girls drunk. All gay men love giving head so you don't have to even worry if you're ugly or have a small hairy cock. Gay men will suck on any cock at any time. This is because if you are gay you can either suck cock or take it up the ass, so gay men don't have many options to choose from.
Autofellatio
Autofellatio is hard to describe, but How to Suck Your Own Dick gives a good guide. Also TOW has a nice image of it, proving that Jimbo Wales is a sick fuck.
Slang
Fellatio is the medical term--what are kids using on the street?
- Lulzing balls
- Becoming rich and beautiful
- Getting your dick sucked by your mom you fucking fruit
- Chookling mah playmates- See Didaskalos
- Drinking from the Garden Hose
- Sucking Sausage
- "Shit was SO cash"
Benefits for Women
Besides being a quicker way to that big promotion, a blowjob has also been shown in various studies to be a more effective way for fat chicks to get laid. Many of these studies were done during the Clinton Administration. For anorexic girls, semen consumption provides assorted proteins and lastly, a forced blowjob makes any women learn her place.
Galleries
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Best fellatio is kawaii fellatio! :3
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Dorian Thorn has sucked ALL the cocks.
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Proper technique
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BLOWJORB
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Jack and Janet fellate a cucumber in this remake of Three's Company.
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Looks like Zangief can't swallow all of that.
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You go girl!
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Complete with squarish cum. See: Gloom
Blowjob on YouTube
Yes. You just watched that.
Moar Blowjorbs!
See Also
- Woman: Giver of Blojobs
- Sex: Like a Blowjob with chance of babies!
- Gay: If a guy is doing this to you
- No Homo: Save against the gay
Fellatio is part of a series on Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage. |