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One can easily picture the denizens of these monster house-things: daddy got a divorce (of course he now lives with an 18-year-old chick in a condo in Florida) and mommy got the house. She's a 48-ish hag, bleached blonde with leathery skin, alcoholic pill gobbler. Used to be a TV news anchor, now she uses her pink iPhone to scream at the ex for MOAR MONEY. 400-square-foot closet full of Jimmy Choo shoes and Coach bags. Leased Beemers and Benzes in the monster garage. The kids are all grown and gone, except for little Sean who is a fat slob in a back room playing FPS games on his multiple consoles, screaming at people on the internet and smoking dope. He probably runs some stupid broken website like Encyclopedia Dramatica anyway. Or if it's in the Sun Belt, it's an "investment" and no one's ever lived there except renters who cooked meth in the garage. Fuck it. |
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