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ASMR

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ASMR (aka Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response) is an internet phenomenon that generally involves various clients relaxing to women (and men, in sadder cases) whispering in their ears over the internet. People who enjoy ASMR videos claim that they don't get any kind of sexual gratification from ASMR, and only do it to relax their minds.

Other types of ASMR include watching people eat, watching people rub shit such as cloth or wood together, listen to people brush their hair, and other ways of being an overall faggot. ASMR often includes role playing situations that involve 16 year old girls talking quietly into your ear and caressing you in a totally non-sexual way while giving you positive affirmations.

An ASMR girl participating in the popular role play of laughing at your tiny dick.

ASMR's Origins

There was once a bunch of epileptic asspies who got some kind of orgasm in their head (god knows it's the only type they'd ever get) from a variety of "triggers," including...

  • Having someone be nice to you (because since that's such a rare occurrence for defective abominations, it really turns their head on).
  • Hearing different languages (just the mere thought of being cultured makes these rednecks jizz).
  • Someone making certain sounds, like tapping on a table, or clicking their tongue (dunno, maybe some kind of fetish with inanimate objects?)
  • Someone reading to you (alright, guys, I can't even think of a joke for this).

...among other normal things. Soon, these faggots began to connect with one another on the internet, and tried their best to come up with a name for it. Before calling it ASMR, many terms were considered, such as Auto-Induced Faggotry, Cranial Nigger Shitting, and Attention Induced Head Orgasm (that last one I'm not making up, lol).

From that point on, sick fucks everywhere had been given the best thing since My Little Pony.

Trolling ASMR Channels

It's very easy to troll ASMR jewtube channel viewers, as they're insecure about their strange fetish. All one has to do is state the obvious sexual nature of ASMR videos and massive butthurt will ensue. In other words, call it porn.

Also, you could suggest they do these very simple and common activities with their real life friends and/or girlfriends, and of course they'll have no way to rebut this because they'd be forced to admit that they have no friends.

Last thing, the ASMR community is chock full of SJW, so make sure to say anything that isn't nice to them. This could range from calling the girl in the video a whore (or if it's a guy, call him a faggot), call members of this community out on their fucking weirdness and demand that they leave the planet on the spaceship they came here on, or simply make a small but polite criticism of the video's author.

Around 80% of the viewerbase of a female ASMRtist struggle to contain their massive erection whilst watching their goddess do her work. This is made plainly obvious by the comment section, as barely any of these sick fucks can resist stating among the most cringe worthy attempts at flirting the internet has ever witnessed. You can ruin the day of these permavirgins by replying with something like "You realize {FemaleASMRTIST X} and her boyfriend fuck on the reg, right?". The dejected fuck will almost instantly shit his diaper in a fit of jealousy.

See Also

External Links


ASMR is part of a series on YouTube.

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