Gersh Kuntzman

The Triggering

Back in June of 2016 a cock wombling poof pansy by the name of Gersh Kuntzman (not just a clever name) got tired of base jumping ass crack ravines and playing butt pool and decided he'd find out what all this "gun control" fuss was all about by ~~shacking up~~, er ~~hooking up~~,... fuck it, there's no nice way to put this, he found the nearest openly gay gun store owner and got a "personal lesson" in firearms, if you know what I mean. This resulted in a hilariously sad editorial piece on guns in which Kuntzman's fingers made his ass jealous by the enormity of bullshit he managed to fudge pack into an online opinion piece on the horribly frightening AR-15 "assault rifle". The article featured about as much sincerity as a fundamentalist Christian preacher caught with his pants around his ankles in the back room of a gay bar whilst entertaining the local plumbers union.