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| [[Image:Big Tit Milf.jpg|thumb|200px|Fake large tits are fake.]]
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| '''MILF''' ('''M'''other '''I''''d '''L'''ike to '''F'''uck) is a term popularized by [[Lie|quality American teen movies]]. By its very nature, the phrase '''MILF''' implies "older" or more "[[mature]]" women. Taken literally it can include [[teen mothers]], 20somethings, 30somethings, and [[grandmothers]]. Typically it means a 35+ year old woman with large, (generally) fake breasts and lips built for [[blowjob|beejay duty]]. '''BEWARE:''' Woman older than 45 years old may suffer [[PMS|Mad Cow Disease]]. The only requirements are that they are [[hot]] and a mother. [[Godwin's Law|Godwin's M.I.L.F. Law]] states that:
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| {{quote|As a MILF gets older, the probability of her taking it [[in the ass]] on the first date approaches 100%.}}
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| ==Dating a MILF==
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| From time to time, you may get tired of the bullshitting and games of younger women that still have hopes and dreams that a [[unrealistic_expectations|rich man with an amazing six pack will sweep them off their feet and fuck them in the ass with a diamond dildo]]. (Editor's Note: This is the dream of all women, including the so-called "career driven" women) You are ready for the quiet desperation of a late thirty-something woman with fat tits and a loose vag that doesn't chafe your cock. In this case, you should totally try dating a MILF. As a young man, you will get away with plenty of things that a younger and prettier woman would totally throw your ass out for. They have no hang ups about giving head, and are more than likely to give you [[Jam It In|access]] to [[Dat Ass|their ass]].
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| In many cases, these women will be post menopausal, allowing you to slam their gaping [[vagina|axe wound]] without a condom, allowing you to feel the disturbingly pleasant warmth and squisheness of her stretched out vag. Sure dating a MILF may feel creepily like [[incest|dating your mom]], but hey, let's be honest here, you REALLY wanted to fuck your mom anyway. MILFs often try to supplement their failing looks with plastic surgery, so expect fake titties, a huge number of skin products, and a tan, leading to an [[guro|overall look that is somehow arousing]].
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| ===Breaking Up With a MILF===
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| After you get bored of nailing MILF assholes and jumping every time her kid knocks on the door, you may realize that most [[truth|MILFs are just as crazy and hysterical as all other women]], plus they have kids you have to worry about and make nice with, even though they hate your guts. And you can only derive satisfaction from "[[win|Hey kid, I'm fucking your mommy!]]" so many times. At this point, it is time to shit in her fridge, steal her kid's [[iPod]], and leave without so much as a note. MILFs take a break up just about as well as any other woman, which means they go into hyper-psycho-passive-aggressive [[bitch]] mode. A crafty MILF will use her children to leave tragic pleading messages on your [[phone]], even though they are totally grateful you are gone. As MILFs are older women, often with disposable incomes, expect a more professional stalking, perhaps even with a car with tinted windows.
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| ==MILF Porn==
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| A [[CP|common fetish]] covered in pornography is MILF or "mature" sex. These women universally posess gigantic fake tits and can go from [[Ann Coulter|mildly hot]] to [[pixelbee|horrifying drippy old mummies]]. All of the MILF porn scenarios are two parts age regression and two parts incest fantasy. Mostly they involve some MILF fucking her "son's" friend, or a dude getting "caught" peeking in at a changing woman. Inevitably, the [[oxymoron|hot intergenerational sex]] must be cut short, because her husband is [[I Came|coming]] home. Anyone who has ever derived ANY arousal from MILF porn has a deep seated desire to make babies with their own mother. They are a sick fuck and should be accordingly shunned and ridiculed.
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| ==Gallery==
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| {{Collapsegallery||Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
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| File:Maddie Fenton and Linda Flynn-Fletcher.jpg
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| File:Maddie and Ann.PNG
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| File:Ann incest.jpg
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| File:Other Mother.jpg
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| </gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
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| File:Ann Possible.PNG
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| File:Ann Inflation.jpg
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| File:Maddie 2.png
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| File:Maddie.PNG
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| File:Maddie Time.png
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| File:Margesimpson playboy.jpg
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| Image:Patricia Heaton Bikini.jpg
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| File:Romany Blythe.jpg
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| Image:titcummilf.jpg|[[shotacon|She loves a young dick to tit fuck her]]
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| Image:Sable.jpg|Two kids have come out of there.
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| File:MS Paint Incest.png
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| Image:Bigmilffaketits.jpg|A MILF getting cock, note the humongous fake knockers
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| Image:Demimooremilf.jpg
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| Image:Italian.JPG|[[Anal sex]], just like grandma made back in the [[Italy|old country]].
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| Image:Catholic-virgin-mary-mother-of-god.jpg|You would - look at the hands!
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| Image:MILF failbook.png
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| Image:Maa_top.gif
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| </gallery>}}
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| == Famous MILFs ==
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| *[[Street Fighter 2|Crimson Viper]]
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| *[[Sarah Palin]]
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| *[[Britney Spears]]
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| *[[Doctor Who|Sarah Jane Smith]]
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| *[[Anna Nicole Smith]]
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| *[[Michael Jackson]]
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| *[[Madonna]]
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| *[[Eel girl]]
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| *[[The Simpsons|Marge Simpson]]
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| *[[Chester Bennington]]
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| *[[Elliot Rodger|Li-Chin Rodger]]
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| *[[Terri Schiavo]]
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| *[[Nigella Lawson]]
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| *[[Goatse Girl|Jewlia Louis-Drypuss]]
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| *[[Everybody Loves Raymond|Patricia Heaton]]
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| *[[Nicole Richie]]
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| *[[Lindsey Roberts]]
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| *[[Verynicelady]], who is also a GMILF
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| *[[Pamela Geller]], Another jew GMILF
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| *[[Family Guy|Lois Griffin]]
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| *[[American Dad|Francine Smith]]
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| *The "Virgin" Mary
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| *[[Undertale|Toriel]]
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| ==See Also==
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| *[[Cougars]]
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| *[[Old people]]
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| *[[Your mom]]
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| {{language}}
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| {{whores}}
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| {{stub}}
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| [[Category:Epithets]][[Category: Sex]]
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