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Broken/Softwarez/Featured Article: Difference between revisions

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{{:Portal:Softwarez/Featured Article/title|Heartbleed}}
{{:Portal:Softwarez/Featured Article/title|Big Data}}
[[File:Heartbleed.jpg|200px|right|image]]
[[File:Bigdata littledick.jpg|200px|right|image]]


'''Heartbleed''' (CVE-2014-0160) is a [[srs|serious]] vulnerability within OpenSSL that allows a skilled [[Skid|hacker]] to steal [[Owned|passwords, usernames,  e-mails, IMs, credit card numbers, private keys]] and other forms of [[Dox|information]] from any website that incorporates the software in their servers. It can also be utilized by the Party Van to take a peek at [[CP|what]] [[you]]'ve been [[fapping|doing]] on TOR.  
'''Big Data''' is a term used by the technologically inept in executive meetings to describe things they don't understand. According to Chief Information Officers with a bachelors degree in Music Theory, Big Data is ''"a field that treats of ways to analyze, systematically extract information from, or otherwise deal with data sets that are too large or complex to be dealt with by traditional data-processing application software."'' In English, this translates roughly to "I still [[I'm 12 years old and what is this?|don't understand]] why they hired me."


<center>'''[[Cutefuzzypuppy | (( ./HEARTLEECH ))]]'''</center>
<center><big>'''[[Big Data| (( ALL YOUR BASE ))]]'''</big></center>

Revision as of 23:52, 10 March 2019

Featured Article - Big Data

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Big Data is a term used by the technologically inept in executive meetings to describe things they don't understand. According to Chief Information Officers with a bachelors degree in Music Theory, Big Data is "a field that treats of ways to analyze, systematically extract information from, or otherwise deal with data sets that are too large or complex to be dealt with by traditional data-processing application software." In English, this translates roughly to "I still don't understand why they hired me."

(( ALL YOUR BASE ))