Angry Birds

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srsbusiness

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Concept art for gameplay

Angry Birds IRL

Angry Birds is a shit game for your various mobile devices. This game, for some unknown reason, caused a shitstorm that shook the entire world of Macs. 16-Year-old girls are the ones who love this game so much because "Zomg it's so freakin addicting!!!1!". Somehow or another, this app became the most popular evar with millions of fanboys.

The Game Itself

The "Story"

Be prepared to be confused as fuck. The story begins with green pigs. These pigs obviously can't cook themselves for a yummy BLT, so the king pig said, "Let's eat eggs!" All the other pigs were too retarded to realize how defensive birds are and said "Do it faggot!" So the pigs steal some eggs. Then, the shit hits the fan when the birds convert to superrage mode.

Gameplay

This is a bit more simple. You have a slingshot. You have to kill the pigs with birds fired from said slingshot. However, this is too easy. The pigs had a shit-ton of wood leftover from God-knows-what so they built 1337 fortresses. Therefore, just like Darwin said, the bird evolved to kill pigs.

The specific bird types are:

• Regular bird: can't do shit, obviously
• Multi-bird: breeds supah fast and splits into 3. Still cant do shit.
• Fast bird: is high on meth and heroin. Flies fast, but even still can't do shit.
• Bomb bird: just like the sandies, these birds suicide bomb and actually CAN do shit
• Bomber bird: the aboves more pussy of a cousin. Lays eggs. Does minor shit.
• Boomerang bird: is from Austria and (gasp) can't do shit
• Fat bird: is fat. Will gang rape the entire screen.

Trolling

There is no possible way to troll the game itself, for the game is a a troll. It will present before you a seemingly impossible level, witch will consume up to 10 minutes (and hopefully ONLY that much time). This is because there is always one, tiny, pussy of pig that will hide, and then laugh at you when you fail. Then, after completely giving up, you find a website to give you a level walkthorugh. You think, "Oh god, I am a reatard for not doing that in the first place!" Then, after following the instructions on said website, you still fail, and pigs resume laughing at you with their troll faces on.

Then, for fanboys, it's as easy s hell. Just say "the x bird sucks" and watch the hate roll in. Its not much different that most fanboism.

Merchandise

The company that shat out the game one day had a brilliant idea: "Let's get more fucking money!" And so, Angry Bird plush toys and T-shirts were born.

Fun fact: many T-shirts rape the Internet even more by putting "Om Nom Nom" on them.

See Also

Farmville is another terrible game that caused a shitstorm.

The Official Website

Buy their Shit

Play it here for free, if you dont want to pay 0.99 cents, you jew

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