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| [[Image:Jananaphone.png|thumb|Bravely going where twenty guys have gone before.]] | | #REDIRECT[[People Article]] |
| {{lj|jananaphone}} is a miserable, disease-ridden [[LiveJournal]] [[fatty]], that is trying to drag the internet down with her into a dark swirling abyss of Twinkies and cheap [[vodka]].
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| For some reason unbeknownest to most functional human beings, Jana has managed to score herself a [[boyfriend]] that will only have sex with her when she is drunk. This fact did not however, stop her from viciously chewing on his penis as if it were a delicious juicy polish [[sausage]].
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| Jananaphone has high-risk HPV and frequently whines about it, often trying to shift the blame off of herself. She believes that because she used a [[condom]], it is completely not her fault that she has acquired HPV and thus should be pitied accordingly. However God did not make her fuck some random-ass guy at a highway rest stop, yet she does curse him nightly for it. She also tries to convince non-believers that they also have the disease, in a weak effort to make herself feel any less alone in this world.
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| Jana is also a closet [[lesbian]] and is majoring in [[Shit nobody cares about|Women's Health]] at [[College|Temple University]]. In her spare time, she likes to count her proliferating genital warts and in [[extreme]] cases of boredom, she likes to connect the warts with a Sharpie to make beautiful constellations.
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| She is rumored to potentially have up to 6 or 7 other [[STD]]s, but so far has not got around to [[bitch]]ing about them.
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| In a moment of irony her LJ motto"''Oh, there's nothing like emptying a cartridge at the sun,''" an activity almost as pointless as her life.
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| ==List of Diseases==
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| *High-risk HPV
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| *Cervical Cancer
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| *[[Depression]]
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| *[[Internet Disease]]
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| *[[Fat|Obesity]]
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| *[[Victim complex|Being a victim]]
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| <br>
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| {{crapstub}}
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| [[Category:LJ Users]]
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| [[Category:People]]
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Revision as of 22:42, 5 January 2012
