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Fellatio: Difference between revisions

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[[Image:006-3-dildo-monster.jpg|thumb|Might need a few moar mouths for this one.]]
[[Image:006-3-dildo-monster.jpg|thumb|Might need a few moar mouths for this one.]]
[[Image:Horny Panties.PNG|thumb|right|That's one pair of horny underpants.]]
[[Image:Horny Panties.PNG|thumb|right|That's one pair of horny underpants.]]
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It's also A character in William [[Shakespeare]]'s ''The Tempest''. Not to be confused with Bond villain henchman, Oddjob (unless that was one of those "odd jobs" he was named after).
It's also A character in William [[Shakespeare]]'s ''The Tempest''. Not to be confused with Bond villain henchman, Oddjob (unless that was one of those "odd jobs" he was named after).


[[Texas]] [[Republicans]] have introduced a law to outlaw gay sex and sodomy.  Problem is, sodomy includes fellatio and therefore all blowjobs would be illegal in Texas which ironically would make Texas the gayest state in the Union.   
[[Texas]] [[Republicans]] have introduced a law to outlaw gay sex and sodomy.  Problem is, sodomy includes fellatio and therefore all blowjobs would be illegal in Texas which ironically would make Texas the gayest state in the Union.  
    
==Technique==
==Technique==
''Explanation on how to get head--written by the [[expert]]!''
''Explanation on how to get head--written by the [[expert]]!''
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==Benefits for Women==
==Benefits for Women==
Besides being a quicker way to that big promotion, a blowjob has also been shown in various studies to be a more effective way for [[fat]] chicks to get laid. Many of these studies were done during the [[Clinton]] Administration. For [[anorexic]] girls, semen consumption provides assorted proteins and lastly, a forced blowjob makes any women learn her place.
Besides being a quicker way to that big promotion, a blowjob has also been shown in various studies to be a more effective way for [[fat]] chicks to get laid. Many of these studies were done during the [[Clinton]] Administration. For [[anorexic]] girls, semen consumption provides assorted proteins and lastly, a forced blowjob makes any women learn her place.


==Successful Blowjobs==
==Galleries==
{{cg||Blow Job Success!|center|<gallery>
{{cg|Successful Blowjobs|Blow Job Success!|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Japanese blowjob.gif
Image:Taking good care of a penis.jpg|Best fellatio is [[kawaii]] fellatio! :3
Image:Taking good care of a penis.jpg|Best fellatio is [[kawaii]] fellatio! :3
Image:Dorian-thorn-sucking-cocks.jpg|[[Dorian Thorn]] has sucked ALL the cocks.
Image:Dorian-thorn-sucking-cocks.jpg|[[Dorian Thorn]] has sucked ALL the cocks.
Image:Mouth Rape.gif|Proper technique
Image:Mouth Rape.gif|Proper technique
Image:Suckifatdick.jpg
Image:Suckifatdick.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Suckskull.gif|This is what's really going on during a blowjob.
Image:Suckskull.gif|This is what's really going on during a blowjob.
Image:Tongueskills.gif|A future fellatrix training
Image:Tongueskills.gif|A future fellatrix training
Image:Blowjo.jpg|A very good bj.
Image:Blowjo.jpg|A very good bj.
Image:Claudia thorn cock gag.jpg|[[Dorian Thorn|Claudia Thorn]] maintains she is NOT a trashy cockwhore.
Image:Claudia thorn cock gag.jpg|[[Dorian Thorn|Claudia Thorn]] maintains she is NOT a trashy cockwhore.
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Sisterhelp.jpg|Dirty [[cockmongler|bitches]] love cock.
Image:Sisterhelp.jpg|Dirty [[cockmongler|bitches]] love cock.
Image:Blowjobgirl.gif|Is she still alive? Hint: It's a trap.  
Image:Blowjobgirl.gif|Is she still alive? Hint: It's a trap.  
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File:Blowjob tattoo.jpg
File:Blowjob tattoo.jpg
File:Institute of oral love.jpg
File:Institute of oral love.jpg
</gallery>}}
</gallery>}}<br>


==Failed Blowjobs==
{{cg|Failed Blowjobs|Blow Job Fail!|center|<gallery perrow="5">
{{cg||Blow Job Fail!|center|<gallery>
Image:Blowjob.jpg|'''BLOWJORB'''
Image:Blowjob.jpg|'''BLOWJORB'''
Image:DoingItWrongBJ.jpg
Image:DoingItWrongBJ.jpg
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Image:Cucumber Fellatio.jpg|Jack and Janet fellate a cucumber in this remake of Three's Company.
Image:Cucumber Fellatio.jpg|Jack and Janet fellate a cucumber in this remake of Three's Company.
Image:Suck11.gif|[[All your base are belong to us|What happen]]
Image:Suck11.gif|[[All your base are belong to us|What happen]]
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Crosseyebj.jpg|Cock eyed redefined
Image:Crosseyebj.jpg|Cock eyed redefined
Image:Cocknose.jpg|Forcing [[retard]]s into oral isn't [[doing it wrong|wrong]] in some [[Israel|countries]].
Image:Cocknose.jpg|Forcing [[retard]]s into oral isn't [[doing it wrong|wrong]] in some [[Israel|countries]].
Image:Dalefellatio.png|[[King of the Hill]] [[doing it wrong|DOING IT WRONG]]. But that's no surprise, [[amirite]]?
Image:Dalefellatio.png|[[King of the Hill]] [[doing it wrong|DOING IT WRONG]].
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Skullfuckwrong.jpg|
Image:Skullfuckwrong.jpg|
Image:Kosher_fellatio.jpg|Jew blowjob.
Image:Kosher_fellatio.jpg|Jew blowjob.
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File:Cheerupblowjob.jpg
File:Cheerupblowjob.jpg
File:Paper blowjob.gif
File:Paper blowjob.gif
</gallery>}}
</gallery>}}<br>
 
==Blowjobs in Videogames==


{{cg|Blowjobs in Videogames||center|<gallery perrow="5">
<center><gallery>
<center><gallery>
Image:Zangiefcum.JPG|Looks like Zangief can't swallow ''all'' of that.
Image:Zangiefcum.JPG|Looks like Zangief can't swallow ''all'' of that.
Image:Pixelblowjob.jpg|You go girl!
Image:Pixelblowjob.jpg|You go girl!
Image:stg.jpg|Complete with squarish cum.  See: [[Gloom]]
Image:stg.jpg|Complete with squarish cum.  See: [[Gloom]]
</gallery></center>
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5"></gallery>}}


==Blowjob on YouTube==
==Blowjob on YouTube==
 
<center><youtube>PIqHHBMBtuo</youtube><br>Yes. You just watched that.</center>
<center><youtube>PIqHHBMBtuo</youtube></center>
<br>
Yes. You just watched that.


==Moar Blowjorbs!==
==Moar Blowjorbs!==

Revision as of 07:21, 18 March 2013

Might need a few moar mouths for this one.
That's one pair of horny underpants.
Hey Ladies!
   
“ 		 
I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce.
  		„
  		 

—J. Edgar Hoover

Some argue that swallowing may prevent breast cancer.

The opposite of anal sex. Fellatio is a Latin word, which means "the act of sucking cock". Your Mom does this really well, but your dad needs more practice.

It's also A character in William Shakespeare's The Tempest. Not to be confused with Bond villain henchman, Oddjob (unless that was one of those "odd jobs" he was named after).

Texas Republicans have introduced a law to outlaw gay sex and sodomy. Problem is, sodomy includes fellatio and therefore all blowjobs would be illegal in Texas which ironically would make Texas the gayest state in the Union.

Technique

Explanation on how to get head--written by the expert!

  1. Get her really drunk
  2. ????
  3. Get her to suck your dick!

The Variation, popular with self injury folk:

  1. While she is sucking, tell her that you will rape her.
  2. She will at this point bite your penis off.
  3. Awesome!.

Gay head

Gay head is different because you do not have to get any girls drunk. All gay men love giving head so you don't have to even worry if you're ugly or have a small hairy cock. Gay men will suck on any cock at any time. This is because if you are gay you can either suck cock or take it up the ass, so gay men don't have many options to choose from.

Autofellatio

Autofellatio is hard to describe, but How to Suck Your Own Dick gives a good guide. Also TOW has a nice image of it, proving that Jimbo Wales is a sick fuck.

Slang

Getting a blowjob is also known as "Cash"

Fellatio is the medical term--what are kids using on the street?

Benefits for Women

Besides being a quicker way to that big promotion, a blowjob has also been shown in various studies to be a more effective way for fat chicks to get laid. Many of these studies were done during the Clinton Administration. For anorexic girls, semen consumption provides assorted proteins and lastly, a forced blowjob makes any women learn her place.

Galleries

Successful Blowjobs About missing Pics
  • Best fellatio is kawaii fellatio! :3
    Best fellatio is kawaii fellatio! :3
  • Dorian Thorn has sucked ALL the cocks.
    Dorian Thorn has sucked ALL the cocks.
  • Proper technique
    Proper technique
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


Failed Blowjobs About missing Pics
  • BLOWJORB
    BLOWJORB
  • Jack and Janet fellate a cucumber in this remake of Three's Company.
    Jack and Janet fellate a cucumber in this remake of Three's Company.
  • What happen
    What happen
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


Blowjobs in Videogames About missing Pics
  • Looks like Zangief can't swallow all of that.
    Looks like Zangief can't swallow all of that.
  • You go girl!
    You go girl!
  • Complete with squarish cum. See: Gloom
    Complete with squarish cum. See: Gloom
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Blowjob on YouTube


Yes. You just watched that.

Moar Blowjorbs!

Asking for it....

See Also

UK Children's TV presenter Holly Willoughby
  • Woman: Giver of Blojobs
  • Sex: Like a Blowjob with chance of babies!
  • Gay: If a guy is doing this to you

Fellatio is part of a series on

Sex

Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage.

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