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Jananaphone: Difference between revisions

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[[Image:Jananaphone.png|thumb|Bravely going where twenty guys have gone before.]]
{{lj|jananaphone}} is a miserable, disease-ridden [[LiveJournal]] [[fatty]], that is trying to drag the internet down with her into a dark swirling abyss of Twinkies and cheap [[vodka]].
 
For some reason unbeknownest to most functional human beings, Jana has managed to score herself a [[boyfriend]] that will only have sex with her when she is drunk. This fact did not however, stop her from viciously chewing on his penis as if it were a delicious juicy polish [[sausage]].
 
Jananaphone has high-risk HPV and frequently whines about it, often trying to shift the blame off of herself. She believes that because she used a [[condom]], it is completely not her fault that she has acquired HPV and thus should be pitied accordingly. However God did not make her fuck some random-ass guy at a highway rest stop, yet she does curse him nightly for it. She also tries to convince non-believers that they also have the disease, in a weak effort to make herself feel any less alone in this world.
 
Jana is also a closet [[lesbian]] and is majoring in [[Shit nobody cares about|Women's Health]] at [[College|Temple University]]. In her spare time, she likes to count her proliferating genital warts and in [[extreme]] cases of boredom, she likes to connect the warts with a [[Sharpie]] to make beautiful constellations.
 
She is rumored to potentially have up to 6 or 7 other [[STD]]s, but so far has not got around to [[bitch]]ing about them.
 
In a moment of irony her LJ motto"''Oh, there's nothing like emptying a cartridge at the sun,''" an activity almost as pointless as her life.
==List of Diseases==
*High-risk HPV
*Cervical Cancer
*[[Depression]]
*[[Internet Disease]]
*[[Fat|Obesity]]
*[[Victim complex|Being a victim]]
<br>
 
{{LJ}}
[[Category:LJ Users]]
[[Category:People]]

Revision as of 16:46, 21 May 2022