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Angela Beesley Starling: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 05:25, 4 May 2015
Angela Beesley Starling is a dirty old cybernetic computer program that possesses artificial intelligence, think like SHODAN from System Shock. It has female traits and characteristics, so it is commonly referred to as a "she." Two of her most notable and frightening aspects are her violently malevolent personality and harsh discordant speech. She roams the Interweb of wikis as Angela, developing grotesque cybernetic experiments on unsuspecting people stranded in virtual reality. She has no physical body, but, hardly hampered by this seeming handicap, she has almost all of the Internet in her evil clutches.
She is also the Dark Queen of Wikiland and is thus satanically married to King Jimbo I, whom she affectionately calls "Pussyboy". No, but seriously, she's married to Tim Starling.
Now that the skinny hag is gone from Wikipedia, let's see what her userpage says:
So, without a word she bailed from the WMF in 2012. What's the "Advisory Board"? fuck if we know. Go and look at Chalk Drop, and it sez "Chalk Drop is currently closed." No word on what her status with Wikia is. Being the co-founder and such.
Her cunty-fresh friends from TOW tried to report her as "missing" and she "corrected" them. Plus begged to have her article deleted yet again, and that was about all she did in 2015.
History
Angela's origins are shrouded in mystery. She is believed to have been a satanic, boney assed AI construct created by Jimbo himself, but this is pure speculation. It is known, however, that when Jimbo pronounced her as Bride and Queen, she gained overwhelming psychic power and influence. Over time she overpowered her erstwhile creator, and twisted Jimbo into her puppet, bending his mind to her will. She used his additional brain to help found a greedy corporate tentacle of the Wikimedia octopus, named Wikia. Which she then helpfully spammed all over Wikipedia. Whilst her cunt swallows galaxies.
Tragically, her reign over the internet, cursed her with a Wikipedia article of her very own, which she hates and has tried to get deleted numpty-nump times. Feel for her. Now doomed to a solitary existence, isolated by her power and madness, Angela is tormented by the thought of vandals and trolls having their way with her article.
Have a look at the litany of deletions. It's not exactly in the same league as the GNAA article, but damn, this is absurd. Whatta fucking mess. Why are there two "2nd nominations", three "3rd nominations", two "4th nominations", and two "7th nominations"? What is all this butthurt, why are the admins so fucking incompetent, and who do you thank/blame??
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_Starling
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_Starling_(2nd_nomination)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(1st_nomination)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(2nd_nomination)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(3rd_nom)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(3rd_nomination)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(4th_nomination)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(5th_nomination)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(6th_nomination)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(7th_nom)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(7th_nomination)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(nom_4)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(second_nomination)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_(third_nomination)
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Angela_Beesley_1
Too late horny guys, she got married
Angela Beesley's now got a husband, Erik Möller Tim Starling, a Media Wiki developer. Angela is a sexy chyck (in spite of the bones sticking out all over) and could sure do a lot better than Möller who looks just like GreenReaper (no offense to GreenReaper who is pretty hot with a fursuit on burn in hell furfag).
The miss in Unicode
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via Angela Beesley Starling/Unicode
- Note most of the letters are H, I, or V... Oops, should've spent less time partying with anonymous editors at Wikimania. What will Eloquence say? (Nothing, they're both history at WMF, lolol)
Gallery
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why the hell do you give out your contact info publicly and say "NO, U CANT TALK2ME"
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why does she play the victim, WIKIPEDIA has ruined people's LIVES and she plays INNOCENT! ZOMGZ!!!111
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Angela as a 16 year old girl
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A forensic sketch, kept by the FBI
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Stop fapping plz
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Bee and Jimbo
Nudes
These pictures were uploaded, and have a high probability of being Angela. Lol.
Contact information
- Wikia
- Lexden - The Methodist Church Wiki founded with her momma Christine and her dad Alan
- Email: [email protected]
- AIM/YIM?: Wikiangela
- IRC: Angela
- Phone1: +44 208 816 7308
- Phone2: +61 3 9018 7308
- Sockpuppet: 202.63.61.242
- The object of her hatred
- Waste some time in her blog, and see what babe she is now.
Angela Beesley Starling is part of a series on Visit the Wikipedia Portal for complete coverage. |