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Revision as of 01:46, 26 June 2023
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Tldr
ContraPoints suggested in a stream that he watched some porn a long time ago and became aroused at the thought of having female genitalia. This is an unconfirmed rumor without the clip itself, but if this is true then it's likely why he's a troid now.
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Hunter Avallone
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ATTENTION! You can help by trolling the shit out of them whenever you see them, then laughing at their lulz-inducing theatrics.
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| Hunter Avallone | |
| Born: | November 11, 1996 |
| Real Name: | Hunter Vincent Avallone |
| Nationality: | American 
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| Occupation: | Youtuber |
| Date joined | March 23, 2014 |
—Hunter Avallone, tempting fate during a debate with John Doyle. | ||
Hunter Vincent Avallone
, AKA Cunter Avallone or Hunter CriesAlone, is a failing YouTuber best known for being a retarded, sourcefagging cuck with a history of grifting. He began as a generic anti-SJW youtuber with a stable and respectable career. Following a steady stream of blunders and betrayals, his career would collapse slowly at first, then all at once. With barely enough viewership across jewtube and Chi-com spyware, he exists as a widely mocked cautionary tale for those who covet the blue pill lifestyle.
Early Life
Hunter was born in Arnold, Maryland in 1996. He's the oldest of 6 siblings, but has somehow managed to act as the most childish of them all. He was born in a conservative Christian family that was also not political. His penchant for YouTube cringe started at a young age, as he and his brother made videos on a channel called 'Comic Shower' while putting what he admitted to be 'cringy' shit on Google Plus. He'd start his own Youtube channel in 2014, and start going political a year later.
'Anti-SJW' Phase
Hunter would begin repressing his inner cryptofag in 2015 under the guise of an anti-SJW Youtuber. Aside from being a gayer Steven Crowder clone, he would say and do nothing to differentiate himself from any other run of the mill conservative channel. By simply repeating right wing talking points by rote and doing nothing to understand right wing politics or its opposition, Hunter amassed an impressive 700K subscribers. Unfortunately for Hunter (and luckily for everyone else), he would grow bored of being successful. See, Hunter wasn't just the gayest straight man you'll ever see (his words BTW), he also has a secret humiliation fetish. From 2019 onward, he'd simply be getting his rocks off.
Career Suicide Speedrun
When nature calls, most people go to a toilet. But not Hunter Avallone. When nature calls, he shits in his backyard. In 2019 during a Toilet Paper USA conference he'd have the bright idea of denying the existence of anti-conservative censorship, before insulting the audience by mockingly using their trademark 'pull yourself up by the bootstraps' phrase against them and accusing them of 'playing the victim'. Needless to say, such unthinking contrarianism did NOT fly. His denial of reality was all the more lulzy in light of the fact that Cunter himself was a victim of this censorship a while before his speech. Unwilling to waste an opportunity to taste his own foot, Hunter would address the criticism by turning against the very people who went up to bat for him when he was temp-B&.
Inspired by a famous Stonetoss comic, Hunter would later kowtow to the Alphabet Mafia under the belief that supporting them was a conservative value. By late 2019, he and his then-GF would move away from the Right and call themselves 'free thinkers', because nothing says free thought like siding with the dominant narrative. For the rest of 2019 and 2020, Cunter would increasingly pick losing fights with his compatriots, while touching tips with Vaush after somehow losing a debate to him. It would eventually culminate in some sob-story video about why he 'Left the Right'. It turns out that Hunter never actually left the right because it was revealed that he never actually part of it in the first place. The only thing Hunter had to show for his faggotry after two years was an irrecoverable loss of over 100K subscribers and viewership numbers which nosedived from 400K to less than 40K.
Collapse
Now a disgraced ex-conservative Youtuber, Hunter's career -such that it was- would now be on life support. On Tim Pool's podcast he'd go white-knighting for Hunter Biden, only to appear as Tim's dumbest guest ever at that point in time. Hunter would quickly learn to stick with debating no-name right wingers, as not many people would bother to watch irrelevant people argue for hours, much less dissect their performance. Hunter occasionally swam outside of his little puddle to pick fights with more popular right wingers like The Quartering, Lauren Southern, and Actual Justice Warrior to name a few. He was waffle-stomped each time, and the massive blowback to his failing career ensuring that such interactions were kept to a minimum. Notable is his hate boner against Nick Fuentes.
Hunter would spend the next few years doing a complete 180 on nearly all the beliefs he supposedly had during his transition into a shitlib. Despite once arguing against veganism, in June 2021 he would announce his allergy of Iron and Vitamin B12 to everyone forevermore. He once called himself a Christian until 2017, only to tip the fedora and start attacking religion in 2022. Although a father of two, he'd go from denouncing to defending infanticide's legality. Perhaps atheists have a soft spot for child sacrifice to Moloch? He'd go from kissing the ring of the homos to swallowing that shit whole, as he spoke in favor of transing the kids. Supporting this is a leftoid rite of passage at this point. During the great Chimpouts of 2020, he would mock the murder of black retired cop captain David Dorn while comparing the death of Fentanyl Floyd to Christ's crucifixion (despite having abandoned Christianity by that point). It seems Carissa Avallone wasn't the only one who preferred their black men to be bad boys, eh? Keeping in character with his pro-pedophile and pro-Hunter Biden stances, he'd endorse Joe Biden as the 'lesser of two evils'. He'd also fall for the Kung-Flu hysteria in its entirety, ironically joining the long-discredited Branch Covidians despite being an atheist. Interestingly, Hunter would also fight with other leftyfags like Keffals and Shoe0nHead.
On February 3, 2022, Cunter would supposedly pack his shit and leave the interwebs indefinitely after getting depressed. His losing battle against reality probably took a toll on his mental health. Hunter had (up until this point) officially hit rock bottom. Rather than climb his way back up like most people, he would waste his dwindling life savings on an excavator and keep digging down. Hunter returned 8 days later, announcing a purge of his 'conservative' content and permanently erasing 100 million lifetime views and dropping it to 16 million. Fellow irrelevant Breadtuber Xanderhaal congratulated him for sacrificing his algorithmic amplification. What 'amplification'?
Cunter resumed employment at ShootYourselfInTheFoot Inc. with great haste. After pussying out of debating Nick Fuentes for years, the two would finally debate and fight over who was gayer. He'd also do his first live debate with John Doyle, which went as well you'd might expect for someone who relies on immediately citing studies from Google. In August 2022 he'd make his departure from Christianity official before attacking it. Despite not believing in God however, Hunter would concern himself with proving that He is immoral. But not only was the 'Christian converts to atheism and attacks his old religion' act a played out punchline by this point, but his increasing insanity was actually making a better case for Christ than Christian apologetics. As such, Hunter would shift some of his energy to an E-Jihad on Islam instead, constantly accusing Muhammad of being a pedophile. Not that it stopped Hunter from advocating the destigmatising of pedophilia that same year, however. He'd also escalate his war with the red-pill community, using their ideas and words against them in an ironic fashion while touting his then-wife and kids as an example that he's more 'trad' than them. After all, nothing says tradition like bailing on your pregnant GF and cheating on her before having those kids outta wedlock amirite? In March he'd also pick a fight with Matt Walsh in a bid to defend transing the kids, again. Using studies bought and paid for by the trans lobby, he'd successfully make the case for childhood autogynephilia.
Despite limited success on TikTok and a glowing article by a publication nobody reads, Hunter's career never recovered. In light of such abject failure and the self-inflicted wounds that caused this, there's a few hypotheses.
- The first is that Hunter did all of this just for some pussy. It's known fact that Hunter and his ex-wife got married right around the same time that he started changing all of his opinions. It might sound crazy that Hunter would willingly destroy a stable career just to get laid, but men have done far dumber things in the pursuit of coochie.
- The second theory is that he's genuine(ly retarded). Hunter admitted that his heart was never really in it when he was making right wing content, but converts to Cultural Marxism are known for their zeal. In his deluded mind, Hunter might have actually done all of this in pursuit of the truth. If it means torpedoing his entire life, then so be it.
- The last theory explaining such a comedic downfall is that Hunter is, at his core, a grifter. The reason why his career imploded is because he bet the farm and fucking lost. Hunter admitted to being a conservative grifter to Vaush, and his content shows that his grasp of leftoid theology is just as vapid and performative. He could've ditched the anti-SJW community due to the fact that it faced increasing censorship and dissolution, along with BreadTube's massive financial success and backing by the powers who (shouldn't) be. Hunter's betrayals and mindless regurgitation of lefty dogma was him trying back the winning horse and get a lucrative career as a lefty streamer for his trouble, but it went wrong. The leftyfag fanbase that was supposed to replace the ones Cunter betrayed never materialized. He had the bright idea of making a subscription service, but forgot that he needed an audience for such a project to work. It didn't. Hunter took his gambit too far to quit now, and since he burnt bridges with the right, his only hope is that he can descend deep enough into madness for the left to fully accept him and save his career.
The truth is probably a mix of the 3, since each would be in character for such a contemptible being.
Hunter CuckedAndAlone
The story you're probably here for, and one that will put Jack Murphy's to shame.
In June, Hunter announced his divorce with Carissa. He claims that they're still friends with no ill will in their hearts and remain focused on raising their 2 kids. Knowing someone like Hunter, he might actually be fine with being friendzoned by the mother of his kids who's taking at least half his shit. The fact that Cunter couldn't even save the marriage that he constantly bragged about having was already bad enough, but the would-be Blue-Pill king got kicked in the nuts by a former debate opponent and porn guy named Kingston Hawke. This nigga revealed EVERYTHING that Hunter's detractors had long suspected.
Hawke and Carissa ended up sexting remarkably fast after a series of chats, which began as political discussions after the two texted each other. She sent her nudes to him alongside her... proclivities. Carissa Avallone owned a restaurant that sells Grade D cuts of roast beef. She wanted to showcase this product with the help of OnlyFans (which Cunter admitted to knowing about and wanting), and then serve it to AT LEAST 5 other older black dudes with a side of mayo. During what would likely be intensive work hours, she'd keep herself refreshed with freshly squeezed lemonade from the guys. Sadly for R. Kelly, such an event was cancelled before it could take place. Carissa also wanted coaching for such a business, as well as many other customers. Another particularly crazy detail was her desperation to make money fast. She needed $5K fast, and saw this 5-man business venture as a way to do it. All that was necessary was Hawke's planning and a cut of the money for his efforts.
Even more damning details were revealed. Hunter's performance under the sheets was so awful he could barely even cum (which may also have to do with how ugly Carissa is), was sexually unimaginative, he was acting like a prissy bitch starting petty fights constantly, and was totally useless at raising his own kids. To be fair, pwning nameless chuds online is far more important than being a parent.
Carissa texted hawke in the first place because deep down she's a hoe and saw him as a means of satisfying that urge. Motivating this were her claims that Hunter is very vanilla in bed and has performance issues (takes forever to cum). She always wanted to go to swinger clubs, and Hunter was unsure about doing such things. NOT SURE??!!!
The breakup announcement wasn't supposed to happen, which is why he took it down so fast.
Carissa suggested an open relationship, which to non blue-pilled people is the universal sign of a dead relationship.
Hunter blew up everything with his announcement, and went to live with his guy friend
Carissa was also desperate for money. For 5K she was willing to set up a gang bang with 5 men, and asked hawke how to do this
She was so desperate for cash because Hunter was being annoying and constantly fighting. She was caught off guard by the announcement, which had came after they decided to separate and see if they wanted open marriage. She just wanted him gone after the open marriage proposal wasnt addressed.
Interestingly though, she seemed to keep getting cold feet and looking for excuses as to why she couldnt do the thing she was earlier fixating on. One excuse was a UTI turning into a yeast infection. The antibiotics she took to treat this caused an ulcer, and then she got strep throat.
She sent her nudes to hawke
She was gonna fly to Houston to make all this stuff happen, but ended last minute
Carissa out of the blue dumped a fuckload of dirt and lauren southern and destiny to hawke
Carissa is trying to be a professional whore
They had bad chemistry. Despite all his posturing, deep down Hunter wanted a housewife. But he was married to a slut who wanted to sell pussy. By camwhoring she became the breadwinner, making way more than Hunter's whole streaming career.
Hunter cant even raise the kids alone when she's out, always getting overwhelmed to a point where only the wife can take on raising the kids. When she was supposed to do the gangbang, she asked her sick mom to take care of the kids because the mom would be better at the task than Hunter. Holy shit. A sick older lady being a better caregiver than Cunter. Cant take care of marriage, cant take care of kids.
[+]Hunter's Statement
I deleted all my tweets because I didn’t need to contribute to the fire or furthering of falsehoods. Here’s the true chain of events:
1.wife and I both agreed to do some onlyfans shit together- this included her sending some photos and messages to people for the business. I genuinely don’t see anything wrong with fucking my wife and making money while doing so. Only insecure betas think otherwise.
2.We set clear boundaries which were: no physical contact with other men - I remain the only man seen in the leaked OnlyFans content and this boundary was never violated the duration of our marriage.
3.Unrelated to the onlyfans stuff, we formally agreed to separate after discussing the idea for the last year and a half
4.Days later, I briefly announced it
5.Carissa only expressed interest in other sexual endeavors after we had both agreed to separate and see other people.
6.Nobody left anyone for anyone else. If this happened, Carissa and I wouldn’t have remained roommates and amicable throughout this process.
7.After legal action was threatened, the initial video spreading the falsehoods and rumors was deleted by the uploader. He has since acknowledged he had misunderstood the situation.
8.due to the fact the photos were meant to be anonymous and the video uploader attached a legal name to the blurred but still visible photos, this is legally revenge porn as the intent of the video was to malign and harass, plus the sender of the photos had a reasonable expectation of privacy.
9.despite the video being deleted, the damage has been done and all the evidence has been saved and handed over to law enforcement
10. it’s creepy how obsessed with my personal life y’all are
At the end of the day, this has taught me a valuable lesson about how quickly rumors can spread and how fast many people are willing to throw you under the bus. This has also taught me to be even more sparing with the people whom I trust.
I know regardless of my words, the uploader retracting his video, my ex wife’s account of things contradicting the rumors, and the clear violation of law, people who hate me will continue to hate me. People will continue to tell me I’m in denial or that I’m “coping” because they’re coming from an emotional place of hatred for me, rather than a genuine respect for the truth.
This is the final time I’ll be engaging with this on Twitter. Thanks for reading.
PS. Tyrone and Jamal were only her friends
According to Carissa, Hunter knew about the sexting. This is backed by the dates of the messages happening prior to the divorce and different from the times Hunter claimed he knew.
The avallones have been coping and seething ever since the video, trying to make Hawke look bad by painting him as a domineering pimp and sex pest.
Hunter keeps making ironic cuck jokes to try and disarm the joke that he's become.
Hawke made the vid as insurance
Where's R-Kelly when you need him?
Carissa felt suicidal later, blaming Kingston for revealing the life choices she did.
May 15- Carissa is sexting Kingston Hawke. According to Carissa, Hunter was looped in on everything.
May 27- discuss separation
She wanted to do OnlyFans to explore her sexuality, ‘spice things up, make tons more cash
Hunter claims the sexting happened AFTER the divorce on the 7th, but in reality the texts were made BEFORE the split. It seems like they and hunter wanted to keep the relationship.
Hunter became the 'cucked by tyrone' meme
In the wake of this vid Carissa went into damage control mode (delete everything mode)
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The face of someone guilty as sin.
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The Gayest Straight Man obviously has a penchant for cross-dressing -
No srsly wtf is wrong with you
Useful Shit
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This person is a sick fuck!
They should never be trusted by anyone! |
Possible side-effects will include at least one of these: |
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Cucklifornia -
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The Left can’t meme. No exceptions. -
How to speak to cultural marxists
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When did Red Skull become the hero? -
And how the fuck did he become one?
Planetside 2 additions
Recursion (00) is the most infamous gang of no-lifers in Planetside 2 history. They a better knowledge of damage falloff and recoil spread than basic social interaction. Outfit Wars was exactly what a group of people with nothing to show for themselves needed, and they would fight like hell for E-clout in a dying game. Knowing this, their opposition decided to doubleteam the opponent that would’ve raped them on a normal day. Recursion lost because of this. It generated much butthurt, and even prompted a response by the devs warning of consequences if this happened again. In an effort to deal with the fact that the ‘best’ outfit in the game got spitroasted, Recursion spun it as being so good their enemies had to team up to have a snowflake’s chance in hell.
DMR 99 explo rounds are broken since the devs copypasted the stats from the dragoon explo ammo onto the the dmr, and didnt adjust them for the type of gun they're on. This means no damage falloff and 75 more damage than regular rounds, shooting faster and hitting harder than gen 2 BRs.
Baron slugs were killing insanely fast and from far away too. Even worse when the baron is coded as a pump action but fires as fast as a semi auto. GGWP, but got nerfed soon.
PS2 servers are shit after every update, Arsenal Update was the straw that broke the camel's back and made the game unplayable for many, even worse cuz it was otherwise a slam dunk update
NCIV aceRubino vs Moukass drama. Moukass is a french-moroccan nigger who fell down the conspiracy theory rabbit hole (free energy, earth liberation alien, Besides all the outfit drama and delusion about a self-build perpetual motion quantum computer that supposedly can astral travel and communicate with your higher self in another dimension shit) and has since gone batshit insane. He also rapidly became completely irrelevant and no longer plays PS2. He was once famous for montages where he'd slaughter oblivious noobs with shotguns.
The space jew robot army got a floating vehicle before the VS
DRAMA. Find combined arms update, CMDR Cyrious tk controversy (https://www.reddit.com/r/Planetside/comments/mthupq/apparently_its_now_okay_to_use_obs_cam_perms_on/), clapbackin69 on PS4, Outfit wars doubleteaming against recursion drama -multiple outfits withdrew cuz the format was unfair lOL (https://www.reddit.com/r/Planetside/comments/lx4hp9/unspoken_code_of_conduct/, https://www.planetside2.com/news/unspoken-code-of-conduct-outfit-wars-2021 , https://www.reddit.com/r/Planetside/comments/lub6oh/1v1v1_state_of_ow/ , https://www.reddit.com/r/Planetside/comments/lzhjy7/mercenaries_tr_connery_will_be_withdrawing_from/ , https://www.reddit.com/r/Planetside/comments/m2p8fv/code_of_unspoken_conduct_and_outfit_withdrawals/, https://www.reddit.com/r/Planetside/comments/m2fj3p/wrel_on_twitter_three_outfits_have_had_their/ , https://youtu.be/TcpeXF2AkxA , )console DDOSing, PC construction hacking, Mellow Martian console, Spiffing Brit stream crash (https://www.reddit.com/r/Planetside/comments/g6ma3x/regarding_the_spiffing_brits_stream_i_just_have/), Planetside 2 arena FAIL (https://youtu.be/rOV5apao6_k , https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1fRFpKnAPM ), Wrel’s faggotry, skyknight drama, dalton nerf drama, OP shit like the canis and HLX heavy crossbow
Ed ps2: add moukass and his fade to irrelevance via ideology craziness, reddit whining, outfit drama, pyramid scheme, accidentally being featured by devs
The brave hackers had to resort to tough love to help the playerbase break their dependency on a shitty game by DDOSing the servers, to break the grip of corporate overlords.
Years later they would use new tactics. One of them involved taking the construction update to its logical conclusion by making euclidian structures. In some cases in provided more lulz and entertainment than the real bases, proving that even fucking hackers can do better than the devs. They also came back with flying MAXes, which was ironically a feature in PS1. They were simply reminding everyone why PS1 was in fact a shit game.