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D.A.R.E.: Difference between revisions
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[[File:dare.jpg|thumb|[[Typical|Figures]] their mascot would be a [[furry]].]] | [[File:dare.jpg|thumb|[[Typical|Figures]] their mascot would be a [[furry]].]] | ||
D.A.R.E. ('''[[Crackwhore|Drug | D.A.R.E. ('''[[Crackwhore|Drug Abuse]] [[Unrealistic Expectations|Resistance Education]]''') was a government-funded [[brainwashing]] program whose main goal was to spread [[Bullshit|bullshitery]] about [[Drugs]] through the [[Poor|public schools]] of [[America|our great and mighty land]] ([[Shit nobody cares about|and Britain, for a while]]). If you were a [[Shota|schoolboy]] or [[Loli|schoolgirl]] in the 80's, you most likely had their message of 'DRUGS ARE BAD, M'KAY?' [[Fellatio|crammed down your throat]]. Even with the support of [[Bitch|Nancy Reagan]] and despite their thourough [[Brainwashing|indoctrination]], D.A.R.E. [[Epic Fail|epicly failed]] since [[Truth|every single one of the students they spoke to in middle school ended out smoking pot in high school]]. A secondary goal was to get kids to snitch on their parents, typified by the subtle tactic of a cop holding weed in front of kids' faces and asking "Have you smelled this before?" | ||
==The Message== | ==The Message== |
Revision as of 22:13, 6 October 2015
D.A.R.E. (Drug Abuse Resistance Education) was a government-funded brainwashing program whose main goal was to spread bullshitery about Drugs through the public schools of our great and mighty land (and Britain, for a while). If you were a schoolboy or schoolgirl in the 80's, you most likely had their message of 'DRUGS ARE BAD, M'KAY?' crammed down your throat. Even with the support of Nancy Reagan and despite their thourough indoctrination, D.A.R.E. epicly failed since every single one of the students they spoke to in middle school ended out smoking pot in high school. A secondary goal was to get kids to snitch on their parents, typified by the subtle tactic of a cop holding weed in front of kids' faces and asking "Have you smelled this before?"
The Message
A typical D.A.R.E. meeting with kids usually involved a police officer coming to school to talk about drugs and alcohol. The cop would mathematically show the kids how much alcohol content would be in a beer can compared to a wine glass and a shot glass, because teens are totally going to think "Wow, that actually taught me some things about the dangers of alcohol" and definitely not "HOLY SHIT! I'M ONLY GONNA DRINK SHOT GLASSES FROM NOW ON!"
The cop would also tell kids about the OVER 9000 chemicals in tobacco. Thanks to D.A.R.E. we now know cigarette companies pour rat poison and rocket fuel into their products to ensure their customers will die. Then, the cop pulls out a dollar bill that they likely took out of their child's piggy bank, and burns it to try and show how people burn away their money on cigarettes. Little did they know was that destroying or defacing currency is a crime in the United States.
TL;DR: D.A.R.E would spew any kind of bullshit to keep you from hitting the nasty - drugs were around every corner, doing crack could turn you gay, your friends wanted to sell you drugs, things like that.
The end result
Studies have shown that kids who sat through D.A.R.E. in school...are MOAR LIKELY TO DO DRUGS!
So let's just review: a program that was created to stop drug use actually made the students who participated more likely to do drugs.
HOLD ON, R U SRS?!?!?
Just goes to show...if you plant bullshit, you shall reap bullshit.
Fail videos
The fail itself
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