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Call of Duty: Difference between revisions
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==Alternate names for ''Call of Duty''== | ==Alternate names for ''Call of Duty''== | ||
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'''The game that has caused the downfall of decades of gaming history in less than 3 years.''' | '''The game that has caused the downfall of decades of gaming history in less than 3 years.''' | ||
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'''Beloved for its broken MP40 and neverending Treyarchian violence fetish.''' | '''Beloved for its broken MP40 and neverending Treyarchian violence fetish.''' | ||
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'''The game that made killstreak variants popular and ruined the future of dedicated multiplayer servers.''' | '''The game that made killstreak variants popular and ruined the future of dedicated multiplayer servers.''' | ||
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'''A game that ran so poorly on the PC that you had a better chance of running [[Crysis]] on ultra. Also the weapons of choice were terrible as fuck and the multiplayer was so terrible balanced that it made Modern Warfare 2 look like Chess''' | '''A game that ran so poorly on the PC that you had a better chance of running [[Crysis]] on ultra. Also the weapons of choice were terrible as fuck and the multiplayer was so terrible balanced that it made Modern Warfare 2 look like Chess''' | ||
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'''There is absolutely nothing redeeming about this game, nothing. It's god awful boring and to this day anyone who plays the game uses the [[Noob|ACR 6.8 or the MP7A1]]. Seriously.''' | '''There is absolutely nothing redeeming about this game, nothing. It's god awful boring and to this day anyone who plays the game uses the [[Noob|ACR 6.8 or the MP7A1]]. Seriously.''' | ||
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'''I've ran out of nigger jokes by now, seriously. This game has nothing special to it except forced choices and a absolutely optional "strategy" mode. The only reason they built this shit in was for marketing purposes. The multiplayer is the same shit as always. Except, now Gayarch went COD4 on it. Ghosts is coming up next, god help us all.''' | '''I've ran out of nigger jokes by now, seriously. This game has nothing special to it except forced choices and a absolutely optional "strategy" mode. The only reason they built this shit in was for marketing purposes. The multiplayer is the same shit as always. Except, now Gayarch went COD4 on it. Ghosts is coming up next, god help us all.''' | ||
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'''Boo, Ghosts, so spooky.''' | '''Boo, Ghosts, so spooky.''' | ||
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'''Call Of Duty: Chink Warfare''' | '''Call Of Duty: Chink Warfare''' | ||
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'''PRESS "F" TO PAY RESPECTS!''' | '''PRESS "F" TO PAY RESPECTS!''' | ||
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'''Everyone asked for a new WW2 CoD, and this is what Activision comes up with. Why is this even a thing? And LOL PC Version is completely fucked, so much for [[PC Master Race]].''' | '''Everyone asked for a new WW2 CoD, and this is what Activision comes up with. Why is this even a thing? And LOL PC Version is completely fucked, so much for [[PC Master Race]].''' | ||
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Revision as of 16:12, 26 June 2017
GENERIC FPS, also known as 'Call of Duty' or 'Children at Daycare', is a FPS series of shovelware vidya games released every year just before the Christmas season for that highly coveted 13-year-old boy demographic and their pocket money. This series alone has destroyed the future of gaming for decades to come.
The games
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Often shortened to CoD, a type of fish. There are multiple Call of Duty games in the series, even ones that actually used to be GOOD. Wow, who knew, right? Which were you looking for?
- Call of Duty / Call of Duty: United Offensive - Made at least 100 years ago was the best FPS game ever made.
- Call of Duty 2 - Made at least 100 years ago and was also a pretty cool game.
- Call of Duty: Finest Hour - First console game, but actually managed to be awesome.
- Call of Duty: Big Red One - Was shit, so nobody cared about it.
- Call of Duty 3 - Made at least 100 years ago, was console shit and as such nobody cares about it.
- Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare - This is where the fandom and butthurt began! Introduced the broken killstreaks.
- Call of Duty: World at War - The last COD game that was like the other old ones, except with overpowered tanks and the most over the top overpowered weapon in FPS history, the MP40. Only good bit was that it had Nazi zombies in it.
- Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 - Call of Duty: Modern Warfare REPACKAGED, now with a first person civilian mass murder mission!
- Call of Duty: Black Ops - Took the story in a different direction by putting everything in the 60s, "innovated" the zombie mode by completely overblowing it with DLC and had the worst PC port of all time.
- Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 - Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 REPACKAGED, now with London bombings!
- Call of Duty: Black Ops II - Call of Duty: Modern Warfare REPACKAGED - AGAIN, in the slight future, disguised as a roleplaying game with totally edgy as fuck "choices".
- Call of Duty: Ghosts - Dogs, woof woof. That is all.
- Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare - Titanfall + Black Ops II + pre-pubescent kids = Advanced Warfare. PRESS "F" TO PAY RESPECTS!
- Call of Duty: Black Ops III - Oh god they made another one?! This time it's an even more edgy cyberpunk shooter with the most cartoonish and immature multiplayer mode of any CoD to date.
- Call of Duty: Online - A Game made by China for the Chinese. is a fusion of all CoDs from Modern Warfare to Black Ops 2. Now available with female characters in revealing outfits.
- Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare - More futuristic bullshit. This time with a SPESS SHIPZZ!!1 gimmick, so all the casual millenial retards can pretend they touched a spaceship simulator at one point in their empty lives. The mutiplayer mode is a carbon copy of the Blops 3 multiplayer mode. You have to buy this shit to get COD4 "Remastered". Nostalgia goggles not included.
- Call of Duty: WWII - Oh fuck here we go again. Welcome back to 2003. World War II for the millionth time, storm that fucking beach for the billionth time, kill some Nazis for the trillionth time, blow shit up for the quadrillionth time.
Players
Call of Duty players are known as:
- Bratty and whiny 13 year old shitheads.
- Video game addicts living in filthy homes.
- Azns (Call of Duty Online Only).
- Rich adults, who try to show others that they are a normal average person.
- Niggers with nothing better to do, aside from looting, chomping down on KFC chickinz, getting quad bypasses and stealing bikes.
- Griefers pissing off all of the above fucktards to make them go ape shit on the mic and post the results on YouTube for public humiliation and lulz.
- Bitchy gamergurlz, trying to show their Friends/the Public that they are hardcore gamers but, but in reality are terrible noobs and feminist attention whores.
- Challenged little kid wannabe soldiers who think everything they see in these games is 100% accurate and realistic, thus making them experts on military technology, tactics, weapons and survival situations. They will then proceed to vomit all the unrealistic bullshit they see all over the Internet as if it's fact.
- Money-whoring YouTube bloggers who release absolutely pointless videos. For example: Play guides for weapons which are totally broken and overpowered and can kill everything in under a second. Yet they make "HOW TO PLAY" videos, then compare THAT GUN with another gun in the game in a NEW VIDEO and still get a million fucking views! We ain't gonna colonize the universe in the near future, that's for sure.
Average Call of Duty players
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YouTube shit
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Alternate names for Call of Duty
Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare | Call of Duty: World at War | Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 | Call of Duty: Black Ops | Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 | Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 | Call of Duty: Ghosts | Call of Duty: Online | Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare | Call of Duty: Black Ops 3 |
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... and YOU can even come up with more, unoriginal and unfunny names on your own time (which you seem to have a lot of, because, you know, no friends.)!
Gallery
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Innovating the FPS genre.
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Call of Duty is known for its single-player replay value.
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Hyper-realistic simulation.
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FPS now and THEN.
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FUCK YOU FAG! YOU FUCKING FAGGOT FUCK!
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They knew ... they fucking knew ...
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Call of Duty campers IRL.
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Typical 12 year faggot comments on a video.
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Adam Lanza's game of choice.
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For girl gamers <3
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COD likes to steal Battlefield's ideas.
See also
If you are still considering to buy this game after all the fail the others have been, then may I suggest you read these scholarly Encyclopedia Dramatica articles below.
- Assassin's Creed - Another bloated AAA that gets milked every year.
- Battlefield, - The far better alternative to Cock of Douches
- Duty Calls: The Calm Before the Storm
- Five Nights at Freddy's - The only other game that has been milked more than this game and has an equally large amount of 12 year olds that obsess over it.
- MLG
- Rear Mission Devolved
- Trickshotting
External links
Call of Duty is part of a series on Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage. |