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| [[File:MAGABomber.jpg|thumb|250px|This is what [[libtards]] actually believe.]]
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| [[File:MAGABomberPropaganda.jpg|thumb|250px|This is what [[libtards]] actually believe.]]
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| [[File:YO4JP5WZIAI6RA4EXTCUSL7PJE.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Cesar Sayoc... or is it?]]
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| '''MAGABomber''' (not to be confused with the '''[[Unabomber|Unabrowmer]]''') is the [[Fanon|unofficial pseudonym]] that has been given to an [[anonymous|unknown individual]] or [[GNAA|group of individuals]] who, starting in late October of [[2018]], began attempting to [[assassinate]] [[Nobodies|prominent members]] of an obscure, [[WalkAway|quickly dying]] [[American]] political party known as the [[Democrats]] by [[duct tape|duct taping]] a bunch of wires and [[plastic crap]] onto pieces of pipe and then hoping that all of their intended targets end up dying of [[heart attack]]s upon seeing the devices – a truly ingenious plan, considering that all Democrats are [[At least 100 years|older than slavery]] and have a tendency to [[Butthurt|completely freak out]] over the [[SJW|absolute dumbest shit imaginable]].
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| On October 22, [[2018]], the first "''bomb''" was received by Sith Lord '''[[George Soros]]'''. This was quickly followed up by [[moar]] "''bombs''" that were sent to former Secretary of State '''[[Hillary Clinton]]''' and [[Bill Clinton|her wife]]; former [[President|God-Emperor of]] [[Black People]], '''[[Barack Hussein Obama]]''' and [[Michelle Obama|his husband]]; former [[Mexican]] gun-runner, '''[[Shit nobody cares about|Eric Holder]]'''; [[batshit insane]] old person, '''[[Maxine Waters]]'''; former Vice President and notorious [[Lolicon]], '''[[Joe Biden]]'''; former [[CIA]] Director turned [[traitor]] to the [[United States]], '''[[Shit nobody cares about|John Brennan]]'''; [[unfunny]] [[ginger]] prop comic, '''[[Carrot Top|Debbie Wasserman Schultz]]'''; washed up [[Hollywood]] [[actor]], '''[[Shit nobody cares about|Robert De Niro]]'''; [[science fiction]] [[television]] network, '''[[CNN]]'''; [[bisexual]] [[rapist]], '''[[Cory Booker]]'''; ex-intel chief '''[[Shit nobody cares about|James Claptrap]]'''; and [[California]]n [[retard]], '''[[Shit nobody cares about|Kamala Harris]]'''.
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| On October 26, [[2018]], the [[FBI]] arrested a [[cis]]-[[gender]], [[heterosexual]], [[Trump]]-supporting, "''[[Le 56 Face|white]]''" [[man]] from [[Florida]] named '''Cesar Altieri Sayoc''' and claimed that he had somehow [[magick]]ally teleported fake bombs [[Bullshit|halfway across the country over the course of a mere 4 days]]. Despite the fact that Sayoc is an obvious patsy and [[literally]] [[dindu nuffin]], the media was more than willing to immediately accept his guilt without question because [[fuck]] [[Drumpf]].
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| Despite being christened as "''The MAGABomber''" by [[Fake News|die lügenpresse]] and a bunch of [[liberal]] [[retards]] on [[Twitter]], the name is [[Wrong|a clear misnomer]] when you realize that the MAGABomber is neither an actual [[bomb]]er nor is there a single shred of [[evidence]] that [[Pronouns|he/she/xe]] actually supports [[Donald J. Trump|Making America Great Again]]. In [[IRL|reality]], it is far more likely that the so-called MAGABomber is a [[liberal]] [[false flag]] operation designed to influence the [[2018]] mid-term elections.
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| == A little Look Into Sayoc's Psyche ==
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| [[File:Sayoc-van-1024x538.jpg|center|400px]]
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| <center>Sayoc's Van</center>
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| {{Quote|Career decision of becoming a [[Mr._Hands|Horse Doctor]] was always a [[furfag|love for animals]], which were here first and never do anything to anyone. And respect all living things. [[ENGLISH_MOTHERFUCKER_DO_YOU_SPEAK_IT|My family very sound Sayoc name in Medical field Grandfather Col. Baltazar Zook Sayoc that perfect the conversion oriental eye to Americanize]]. The first plastic surgeon to be observed by 8 million people in NY city Hospital. He over through Communist Philippines liberated island. He built all hospitals in Philippines islands and sets standards highest level. Most surgeon use his instruments which are patented. And a lot surgeon use today. Also Sayoc intl. schools marshals arts [[Curry_nigger|Kali]] that used to over throw communist party . Also one 5 Hero’s disciplinary my mother Madeline Sayoc Giardiello First president Pharmacy Cosmetic Association, Who Who Business Women of Year, Soul buyer consultant for Home Shopping Network, head number 1 marketing consul in World Aventura Marketing consul, up for city counsel women Aventura|[https://thehayride.com/2018/10/meet-cesar-sayoc-the-most-comically-incompetent-political-terrorist-of-our-time/ from the education section of Sayoc's LinkIn]}}
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| == The /pol/ Man's James Bond ==
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| In addition to his arsenal of superweapons, Sayoc appears to have been a master of disguise who could become bald or [[Fursuit|hirsute]] at will, and was capable of bulking up and shrinking like a jack-in-the-box.
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| <br>
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| <br>
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| {{collapsegallery|The /pol/ Man's James Bond|pol|center|<gallery>
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| File:MAGABomb.jpg
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| File:CatBomb.jpg
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| File:YeOldeTimebomb.jpg
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| File:BirdBomb.jpg
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| </gallery>|<gallery perrow=4>
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| File:Bald cesar sayoc - magabomber mugshot (2002).jpg
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| File:Cesar sayoc - magabomber mugshot 2 (2005).png
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| File:Cesar sayoc - magabomber mugshot 3.jpg
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| File:Cesar sayoc - magabomber mugshot (2018).png
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| </gallery>|<gallery>
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| </gallery>}}
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| <br>
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| == High Score ==
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| <center>
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| {| style="{{roundy|18px}}{{gradlinear|red|orange}}box-shadow:0 3px 6px gray;padding:1em;margin:0 auto 1em auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="2" border="0"
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| ! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:red;box-shadow:0 3px 6px orange;" | <big>Graded score</big>
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| | colspan="2" style="height:9px;overflow:hidden;" |
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| ! style="text-align:right;" | Kills:
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| |0/20 ''Fake bombs don't kill people, [[Hillary Clinton]] does''
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| ! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" | Accuracy:
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| |0/20 ''None of the so-called bombs even worked''
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| |-
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| ! style="text-align:right;" | Style:
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| |0/20 ''Believed that [[Larry the Cable Guy]] is actually funny''
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| |-
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| ! style="text-align:right;" | Butthurt:
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| |0/20 ''The [[liberal]] [[butthurt]] caused itself''
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| |-
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| ! style="text-align:right;vertical-align:top;" | Bonus:
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| |0/20 ''Try to actually kill some people next time, faggot''
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| ! colspan="2" style="{{roundy|9px}}background-color:orange;box-shadow:0 3px 6px yellow;" | <big>Total score: 0/100 ('''F-''')</big>
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| |}
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| </center>
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| <center>'''GIT R DONE'''</center>
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| <center>'''[[High Score| See full ranking]]'''</center>
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| <center>
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| <div style="{{roundy|10px}}border:2px solid #000;width:30%;background:linear-gradient(#c58d29, #447e80);background:-moz-linear-gradient(#002db3, #4da6ff);background:-webkit-linear-gradient(#002db3, #4da6ff);background:-o-linear-gradient(#e18f80, #666c05);padding:10px;font-weight:bold;font-size:larger">
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| <span style="font-size:16pt;">'''Wanted Level:'''</span>
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| <br>
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| <span> ___________________ </span>
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| {|align="center"
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| |[[File:Wantedstar.png|40px]]
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| |[[File:Wantedstar.png|40px]]
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| |[[File:Wantedstar.png|40px]]
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| |[[File:Wantedstar.png|40px]]
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| |[[File:Wantedstar.png|40px]]
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| |[[File:Wantedstar.png|40px]]
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| |[[File:Wantedstar.png|40px]]
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| |}
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| <span> ___________________ </span>
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| <br>
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| {|align="center"
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| |[[File:Soroseye.jpg|220px]]
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| |}
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| <br>
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| <span style="font-size:12pt;">'''The New World Order'''</span>
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| </div><br>
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| </center>
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| == External Links ==
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| * [https://thehayride.com/2018/10/meet-cesar-sayoc-the-most-comically-incompetent-political-terrorist-of-our-time/ The most incompetent political terrorist]
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| * [https://www.google.com/amp/amp.miamiherald.com/news/article220660450.html FBI used fingerprints]
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| * [https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.washingtonpost.com/amphtml/nation/2018/10/26/who-is-cesar-altieri-sayoc-what-we-know-about-suspected-mail-bomber-arrested-florida/ Who is Cesar Sayoc?]
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| == See Also ==
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| * [[Ahmed Mohamed]]
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| * [[ATHF Terrorist Attack]]
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| * [[Piedmont Park Hanging]]
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| * [[Larry the Cable Guy]]
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| * [[Unabomber]]
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| * [[WalkAway]]
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| [[File:False flag cartoon.jpg|center|500px|link=Zyklon Ben]]
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| {{Terrorists}}
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| {{Trump}}
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| [[Category:America]]
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| [[Category:People]]
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| [[Category:2018]]
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