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Kirtaner: Difference between revisions
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==lol [[SWATTED]]== | ==lol [[SWATTED]]== | ||
[[File: | [[File:KirtSWAT.png|thumb|200px|His name is Aubrey and he didn't get much sleep on [[last_thursday|Thursday]].]] | ||
Apparently Kirtypoo [http://www.citynews.ca/news/news_22727.aspx got raided] in a pretty [[lulz|lulzy]] raid by a good [[Aush0k|friend]] from [[Australia|Ausfalia]]. Police received a 911 call telling them to rush to the family's apartment, where an armed man was reportedly holding hostages and firing off bullets. | Apparently Kirtypoo [http://www.citynews.ca/news/news_22727.aspx got raided] in a pretty [[lulz|lulzy]] raid by a good [[Aush0k|friend]] from [[Australia|Ausfalia]]. Police received a 911 call telling them to rush to the family's apartment, where an armed man was reportedly holding hostages and firing off bullets. | ||
Revision as of 03:44, 1 May 2011


Kirtaner is a Canadian anime dork and pedophile. Online Kirt has also been identified as a piece of shit faggot who runs 420chan, and in real life as Aubrey a hopeless drug addict.
Kirtaner's only notable actions in life revolve around "ironically" being gay, possessing/creating child porn, giving buttplugs to jailbait on a first date, and generally being a stupid turd. One of the most memorable things he did was abuse drugs and then impersonate goatse in a live showing for his pedophile anime irc buddy Shii. Immediately after this he also took pictures of himself sniffing his fingers.
When not taking pictures of himself being wacky and ironic and tearing his asshole apart, he can be found posting in his livejournal (LONG GONE NOW) about abusing drugs and subsequently having sex with any passing bodily orifice. He doesn't seem to mention, however, that he still lives with his mom, and remains unemployed, hence the frequent calls for donations on 420chan.
Recently, Kirtaner has hooked up with Yoko-ono esque Sparto. It's the standard internet relationship: friendless-in-IRL, personality-dysfunctional attention whore sluts it up for nerds to get more of the delicious attention she so desperately craves; attention whore latches on to powerful e-penis wielder; attention whore receives modship of shitty website; attention whore becomes e-penis wielder's "gf 4evr". The relationship is scheduled to end in a few months the same way they always do: attention whore turns out to be a dude, e-penis wielder bans attention whore forever, we pretend like it never happened. So far, however, they've somehow managed to stay together for 2 years.
Internet presence
When not having his pipes cleaned out by black dicks, he is usually posting on his message board "420chan", a haven for maladjusted pedo anime faggots like himself and Marshall Banana. Prior to this, he ran the website spyderlake which in turn illegally ran a server for the gook mmorpg Ragnarok Online because he really fucking loves Japan and is apparently suffering from a very special type of AIDS that makes him forget that Rag is from Korea. Srsly
Due to the stupid cunt leaving his image directories open, child porn (The homo claims it was actually xenogears loli but no one believes him because he is Kirtaner) was found on his webspace and he was banned from Something Awful after forum members led a crusade to get him and his retarded partner in crime Marshall Banana permabanned. This act was somehow a crushing blow to his self-esteem that turned him into a bigger introvert. In addition to this, there were pictures of him kissing men at anime conventions, proudly displaying his malnourished and horrifyingly thin frame, and the aforementioned pictures of him "ironically" jamming his hands into his goddamn asshole.
It has been alleged that Kirtaner had asked other goons to choke him during SA meetups. He also tends to do various things with his ass during Stickam sessions, such as shoving a bottle in it, pulling it wide open a la goatse, or trying to replicate loopback.jpg.
Kirtaner was recently outed as abysmally shit SA poster Chroanopol, and was permabanned. He was recently outed again as 'terrakin' (an anagram of Kirtaner) and booted yet again.
On May 26th, 2010, He was outed again as another shit SA poster, BABY FlNLAND. (Notice the l instead of an I) Registered on March 8th, 2008, proving yet again, that Kirtaner is still butt-hurt about SA's accusations of pedophilia.
Kirtaner is also a former member of the BatJew forums. He was frequently mocked there just as he is mocked across the internets. Kirtypoo fanboys claim Kirtaner is a very good friend of Moot's and W.T. Snacks as well as one of the very first channers, even stealing the original 30get on 4chan when it was first started up.
lol SWATTED

Apparently Kirtypoo got raided in a pretty lulzy raid by a good friend from Ausfalia. Police received a 911 call telling them to rush to the family's apartment, where an armed man was reportedly holding hostages and firing off bullets.
—Kirtaner |
—City News |
It is worthy to mention that the idiot who wrote the sentence below, (See: "The moron that did it..) did not take into consideration the fact that the arrest of DShocker occured prior to the "SWATting" incident of Kirtaner, and thus should diaf.
The moron that did it was actually from Mississippi. He spent 6 months in juvie. After that he came back to the internet and was mocked by everyone for being the idiot that got caught.
Gallery
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Skirt Kirt
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Hottie?
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Doing what he does best with the gal he loves.
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Kirtypoo in all his glory.
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Kirt, after smoking himself retarded during a donation drive
See Also
External Links
|
Kirtaner is part of a series on Visit the Chans Portal for complete coverage. |