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Bags of Money: Difference between revisions
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===Selected Passages=== | ===Selected Passages=== | ||
[[File:Dreamjob.png|thumb|right|Who the hell would ever think this would be appropriate to put in a financial help book?]] | |||
{{squote|Then it dawned on me, these people is in jail. The only difference is they do not see the bars. The jail is the way they think. The way they think keeps them trapped in a certain place in life... just getting older.}} | {{squote|Then it dawned on me, these people is in jail. The only difference is they do not see the bars. The jail is the way they think. The way they think keeps them trapped in a certain place in life... just getting older.}} |
Revision as of 06:33, 11 September 2011
Bags of Money, or Tobias Boyland, is a batshit insane nigger who, after being released from prison on a 14 year drug sentence, decided it would be a good idea to try to reform himself into an outstanding businessman. He claims to be a hardcore gangster, despite proclaiming the whitey cesspool of Buffalo, NY to be his "hood". His main claim to fame is authoring a self help book that reads like a typical MySpace profile mixed with one of those get rich quick infomercials they air in the middle of the night. If that alone was not bad enough, after the book was published, he ran a large promotion campaign both IRL and OTI. His success can be demonstrated by the book becoming an alleged massive hit, so much so that it has not yet been classified as "out of print" on Amazon.
THUG MOTIVATION
Few words can be said to accurately describe the modern literary masterpiece known as THUG MOTIVATION. Published by Bags in 2007, it is a whole 120 pages spit into 60 informative chapters (that's two pages a chapter) such as "CHECK YO BITCH", "EVERYDAY HUSTLIN", as well as "CUT OFF A CHICKEN HEAD". The entire book was quite obviously made to serve no real purpose, other than to stroke Bags' ego for the fact that he, unlike his ancestors, was successfully able to afford a mediocre home in a humdrum suburban neighborhood. Because of this and a lot of other things that tend to get to his head, Bags sees himself as some kind of high class entrepreneur, and credits things like his ghetto entourage to his "success" rather than the fact that he liberally throws money around to anyone willing to "model" for filler content in is writing.