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ForeverKailyn: Difference between revisions
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<center>{{morphquote|mqtest1|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|This is Tah Jay Mah Hai.|'''ForeverKailyn pronouncing NARS Taj Mahal blush'''|Everyone gives up their diet on the weekend.|'''ForeverKailyn on BlogTV'''|I'm on peroid dummy|'''ForeverKailyn, on her period'''|I have so many stuff!|'''ForeverKailyn'''|It smells like...Paris amour.|'''ForeverKailyn describing the Paris Amour candle scent'''|This is pink slice|'''ForeverKailyn attempting to say Pinksickle'''|I don't have gentle herpes.|'''ForeverKailyn'''|This is rosebud slave|'''ForeverKailyn pronouncing "rosebud salve"'''|Sanba? Samba?|''ForeverKailyn pronouncing "scuba"'''|Every since I've become pregnant all I do is think about my baby and all the things I would love to buy for him or her I don't even care about buying things for me anymore I'm I'm mommy mode 24/7 :)|'''ForeverKailyn, before she spent $1000 over 3 months on useless make-up for herself'''|Yeah but my doctor didn't say i'm obese and i'm not|'''ForeverDelusional'''|I need to be respons...ibilities|'''ForeverResponsible'''|border=white|background=white}}</center> | <center>{{morphquote|mqtest1|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;|This is Tah Jay Mah Hai.|'''ForeverKailyn pronouncing NARS Taj Mahal blush'''|Everyone gives up their diet on the weekend.|'''ForeverKailyn on BlogTV'''|I'm on peroid dummy|'''ForeverKailyn, on her period'''|I have so many stuff!|'''ForeverKailyn'''|It smells like...Paris amour.|'''ForeverKailyn describing the Paris Amour candle scent'''|This is pink slice|'''ForeverKailyn attempting to say Pinksickle'''|I don't have gentle herpes.|'''ForeverKailyn'''|This is rosebud slave|'''ForeverKailyn pronouncing "rosebud salve"'''|Sanba? Samba?|''ForeverKailyn pronouncing "scuba"'''|Every since I've become pregnant all I do is think about my baby and all the things I would love to buy for him or her I don't even care about buying things for me anymore I'm I'm mommy mode 24/7 :)|'''ForeverKailyn, before she spent $1000 over 3 months on useless make-up for herself'''|Yeah but my doctor didn't say i'm obese and i'm not|'''ForeverDelusional'''|I need to be respons...ibilities|'''ForeverResponsible'''|border=white|background=white}}</center> | ||
== The Beginning: KaiKhaod, KailynsKreations == | |||
[[Fetal Alcohol Syndrome|FAS]]lyn started out on YouTube in 2007, during the glory days of the YouTube beauty community. She was a fan of so-called "beauty gurus" like xsparkage, and wanted to be just like them. With a twinkle in her MAC-decorated eye, she made her appearance with a beautiful mullet cut and her first face routine video. Notice how it takes her 9 fucking minutes to apply foundation? Nothing has changed since 2007, including her narcissistic tendency to stare at herself in the mirror...while on camera. If there is anything amazing about Kai, it would be her complete inability to improve her makeup skills, even after years of daily practice. | |||
KaiKaod was eventually rage-deleted, paving the way for KailynKreations, which was subsequently rage-deleted when new scandals emerged. | |||
{| align="center" style="padding:0px;" | |||
|<center><big>'''Face Routine: Kai's First Video'''</big></center><br> | |||
<center><youtube>kChjXc6wh1c</youtube></center> | |||
|} | |||
== The YouTube Sensation: ForeverKailyn, SincerelyKailyn == | |||
=== ForeverKailyn (Currently Deleted) === | |||
Kailyn's latest and greatest channel. Despite years of making beauty videos, she has only reached a sad high of nearly 13,000 subscribers when she [[deleted fucking everything]] in February 2014. Her average videos received 1000-3000 views. She disabled ratings because she couldn't handle all the dislikes she would get, and theorized that a handful of "haters" were creating 50+ accounts each just to downvote her videos. | |||
==== Kailyn's Kontent: ==== | |||
* annoying video intros with her dead-inside sociopath eyes looking at you "HAYYYY GUUUUUYSSSS" | |||
* haul after haul of cheap, shitty drugstore makeup to add to her hoard | |||
* purchases of products she already owns duplicates of | |||
* reviews of products she begged companies to send her for free | |||
* a showcase of her aversion to anything flattering | |||
* ill-fitting, out-of-breath OOTDs (Outfit of the Day) with Walmart, Target and Kohl's clothes | |||
* Kai applying makeup just to sit inside, diddle herself and watch ''General Hospital'' | |||
==== What you will never see on ForeverKailyn: ==== | |||
* skilled makeup application or how-tos, tricks or tips | |||
* hauls of interesting, higher end makeup that every fucking guru doesn't already have | |||
{| align="center" style="padding:0px;" | |||
|<center><big>'''Tutorial: Red Vampy Makeup'''</big></center><br> | |||
<center><youtube>MoCdxE112_o</youtube></center> | |||
{| align="center" style="padding:0px;" | |||
|<center><big>'''ForeverKailyn OOTD'''</big></center><br> | |||
<center><youtube>k7hTs5s2VCg</youtube></center> | |||
=== SincerelyKailyn (Currently Deleted) === | |||
The SincerelyKailyn channel was created after Kailyn's main channel's ad revenue was suspended for violating Google AdWords' user agreement. Kailyn, being the [[idiot|genius]] she is, probably thought that constantly clicking on her own ads was going to make her more money. | |||
SincerelyKailyn was likely made with Mama Wheelchair's info, to get around the suspension and earn Kai some pennies. She began to post food vlogs, showing off her favorite snacks and demonstrating the metric fuck-ton sugar she likes in her cup of coffee. She also offered insight into her personal life with videos of her and hubby Matt "hurr hurr"-ing around town, mostly at Walmart or in his bedroom. After her pregnancy was announced, she began posting pregnancy updates. By far the most tedious videos on this channel were her tag videos. | |||
<center><youtube>gKhkowmSyq0</youtube></center><br />{{squote|I'm just gonna try one...scoop...[of sugar]|'''ForeverKailyn, adding 1/4 cup of sugar'''}} | |||
<center><youtube>zAaxn2DJf_U</youtube></center><br />{{squote|Our life is not that exciting!|'''Kailyn and Matt, like no shit'''}} | |||
== Kai's Supporting Cast == | == Kai's Supporting Cast == | ||
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Kai plans to take Matt's name...one day. Until then, she usually goes by "Kailyn Wilcher", or "Kailyn Marie Hughes" when she's feeling [[forever alone|particularly married]]. | Kai plans to take Matt's name...one day. Until then, she usually goes by "Kailyn Wilcher", or "Kailyn Marie Hughes" when she's feeling [[forever alone|particularly married]]. | ||
Basically their marriage is a fucking sham and didn't need to happen. There's no point. | Basically, their marriage is a fucking sham and didn't need to happen. There's no point. | ||
==== Maureen ==== | ==== Maureen ==== | ||
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It is interesting to note, however, that Mooreen is able to hold down a steady job at Goodwill, has a driver's license, and holds a college degree, unlike Kailyn. | It is interesting to note, however, that Mooreen is able to hold down a steady job at Goodwill, has a driver's license, and holds a college degree, unlike Kailyn. | ||
=== Pregnancy (2013) === | |||
[[File:ForeverKailynBabyBump.jpg|thumb|right|She's not showing yet, that's just her normal [[gunt|body]]. No, seriously.]]Kailyn had a miscarriage in March 2013. Once her miscarriage was revealed in October through her CafeMom posts, she proceeded to tell everyone (including random strangers) on KiK the gory details, much to everyone's dismay. | |||
Despite voicing countless times that she would be waiting until her late 20s to have children, Kailyn finally got pregnant in late 2013 after a supposed 'seven months of trying'. Since the beginning she has underplayed how desperately she wanted a girl, while clearly dreading the possibility of having a boy. She has pestered her YouTube subscribers for gifts throughout the pregnancy, while insisting that her family can give the baby everything it needs, with or without gifts. Despite claiming that her baby is now her top priority, Kailyn has preferred to spend thousands of dollars on expensive makeup and clothes instead of buying things for her child. She claimed she was having two baby showers--one held by her mom and the other by the church Matt's family attends. It was later revealed that she had lied about the church offering to host a baby shower for her. When confronted, the church expressed disgust that it was associated with Kai. | |||
== Scandalous Kai == | == Scandalous Kai == | ||
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Kailyn (more affectionately known as "Gorilla") has been steadily gaining weight for years. The only vegetables she eats are cucumbers (with ranch), carrots (with ranch), and potatoes. The only protein she really likes is chicken, preferably coming from a can and fried in a lot of oil. See Imgur album for proof.[http://imgur.com/a/jzVpJ#0] | Kailyn (more affectionately known as "Gorilla") has been steadily gaining weight for years. The only vegetables she eats are cucumbers (with ranch), carrots (with ranch), and potatoes. The only protein she really likes is chicken, preferably coming from a can and fried in a lot of oil. See Imgur album for proof.[http://imgur.com/a/jzVpJ#0] | ||
=== RAAAAAAAAAPE === | === RAAAAAAAAAPE === |
Revision as of 07:31, 23 February 2014
"ForeverKailyn" Kailyn Marie Wilcher-Hughes (or Kai, KaiKhaod, KailynsKreations, SincerelyKailyn and other associated names) is a 23-year-old self-proclaimed YouTube Beauty Guru, Socialite and Makeup Artist from Bowie, Maryland.
In actuality, she is a shit-talker, as well as a fabulous source of entertainment, endless scandals, and drama. She's also a fat, lazy unemployed cunt who lives in her childhood bedroom despite being married and pregnant. Kailyn has had multiple sites dedicated to her, her trolls, and her numerous mishaps.
In addition to being "home-schooled" and heavily sheltered by her dip-fucking-shit mother, it is speculated that Queen Kai suffers from Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, but she claims she is not disabled. However, her lack of basic social skills, reasoning skills, reading ability and lack of common sense say otherwise. She has admitted to being tested in her younger years. It is speculated that her mother hides her condition from Kailyn herself, which is why Kailyn denies it when asked.
As of February 2014, Kailyn has been in hibernation, hiding from the blow-up over her most recent scandal.
—ForeverKailyn pronouncing NARS Taj Mahal blush |
Previous Quote | Next Quote
The Beginning: KaiKhaod, KailynsKreations
FASlyn started out on YouTube in 2007, during the glory days of the YouTube beauty community. She was a fan of so-called "beauty gurus" like xsparkage, and wanted to be just like them. With a twinkle in her MAC-decorated eye, she made her appearance with a beautiful mullet cut and her first face routine video. Notice how it takes her 9 fucking minutes to apply foundation? Nothing has changed since 2007, including her narcissistic tendency to stare at herself in the mirror...while on camera. If there is anything amazing about Kai, it would be her complete inability to improve her makeup skills, even after years of daily practice.
KaiKaod was eventually rage-deleted, paving the way for KailynKreations, which was subsequently rage-deleted when new scandals emerged.
The YouTube Sensation: ForeverKailyn, SincerelyKailyn
ForeverKailyn (Currently Deleted)
Kailyn's latest and greatest channel. Despite years of making beauty videos, she has only reached a sad high of nearly 13,000 subscribers when she deleted fucking everything in February 2014. Her average videos received 1000-3000 views. She disabled ratings because she couldn't handle all the dislikes she would get, and theorized that a handful of "haters" were creating 50+ accounts each just to downvote her videos.
Kailyn's Kontent:
- annoying video intros with her dead-inside sociopath eyes looking at you "HAYYYY GUUUUUYSSSS"
- haul after haul of cheap, shitty drugstore makeup to add to her hoard
- purchases of products she already owns duplicates of
- reviews of products she begged companies to send her for free
- a showcase of her aversion to anything flattering
- ill-fitting, out-of-breath OOTDs (Outfit of the Day) with Walmart, Target and Kohl's clothes
- Kai applying makeup just to sit inside, diddle herself and watch General Hospital
What you will never see on ForeverKailyn:
- skilled makeup application or how-tos, tricks or tips
- hauls of interesting, higher end makeup that every fucking guru doesn't already have
|