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Shemale: Difference between revisions
imported>Deadpriest The hymen was extra!! |
imported>Deadpriest The hymen was extra!! |
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Revision as of 22:33, 28 March 2015
File:345px‑ana paula.jpg Not to be confused with dickgirls, a shemale or MTF is the inferior type of transsexual. Unlike their FTM counterparts who seek self improvement through means of masculinity, MTFs degrade themselves and all mankind by lowering themselves to the disgraceful level of a woman.
It is popular opinion that God made these people for the lulz of all mankind, as there is no bigger joke than wasting half your life as an emo faggot, only to some day, after a shitload of agonizing surgery, look vaguely girlish and have a fake pussy.
Recently sluts with nuts found the internet and have set up their own forum: http://www.hungangels.com/board/ . They generally use this forum to try and claim they are real "women" and that being a call girl (read: whoring yourself on craigslist) is a respectable profession. Trolling this site generally leads to intense lulz.
History
Sometimes when we're growing up, God screws up our brains. Luckily for those thus screwed up, hormones and mutilation can provide loads of jewgold for sick fucks in the medical profession, unless of course you're a transvestite and too pussy to go through with it.
Simpler and cheaper means can also be used; some shemales operate on themselves quite successfully, though applying a saw to one's penis is certainly not recommended. Once shemales hack off their dick, they usually cook it at 45° Celsius and eat it as a symbol of their disdain for the male sex.
FTMs have an easier time as they do a relatively convincing job of looking like members of the opposite sex, despite the two forms of genital surgery available to them being complete shit. Phalloplasty creates a penis which looks like a mangled sausage hanging from their crotch and metoidplasty creates a tiny red penis which looks like it should be attached to a 13 year old boy. Since a lot of men have tiny cocks anyway, this is not unbearable. Still, in place of either form of surgery, many choose to keep their mangina and buy a nice, high-quality prosthetic penis, thus reducing their own separation from bull-dykes.
Many feminists find men claiming to be women upsetting, and say no one born with a penis should be allowed into Womyn-only Music Festivals. There is nothing more distressing than hearing a man in a dress join in a discussion about menstrual blood.
Some shemales prefer to be called transgendered on the pretext that gender and sex have different meanings, the claim being that gender is mental and sex is physical. Most "cisgendered" people do not accept that the two words are not interchangeable, which results in many IRL flame wars.
Many shemales are also lesbian, and hit on other lesbians while still having a penis, but when the lesbian freaks because her new date is missing a pussy, she's being a bigot. Like much of the logic involved, retardation is required to go along with it.
MTFs that are attracted to men are most likely just gays in total denial, and they are willing to go through all that surgery and change as their warped way to justify the fact that they crave hot cock. They can't deal with the thought of having their best male friends blasting cum up their anuses, because that would be gay, so they want the gooey loads to be shot into an artificial hole, lovingly constructed by some plastic surgeon.
Feminazis particularly attract shemales because of their generous offers of free castration. Their radical hatred of men precisely corresponds with the feelings most pre-op shemales have towards their own sexual organs. However, most shemales make a vain effort to blend in with the general female population and to avoid attention, attract sick rednecks, and pander to their own residual sense of male superiority by being strongly antifeminist.
Transdykes
Transdykes are trannies that don't like the cock. Mostly, it's a label that asshats assume, after they realize how retarded they sound saying that they're a "lesbian trapped in a man's body." Most transdykes start off as 13 year old boys in chatrooms, pretending to be lesbians so that they can cyber with other lesbians that are also really 13 year old boys. Once they realize that they've wasted their puberty like this, they decide to just commit to the fantasy, and pretend that they really are some hawt chick, IRL.
Wannabe Cybertrannies: Transformationalists
"Transformationalists", or TFs for short, are sick fucks who fantasize about being able to switch back and forth between sexes whenever they get bored with whatever sex they are at that point, and often role-play this in games and on message boards. They often hang out IRL in comic book stores, various TF-themed webcomics such as [1]El Goonish Shive and The Wotch, metamorphose.org and GenderShifters.
They are even sadder than furries, though many of them are both furries and queer. No TF has been laid in recorded history and very likely this record will not be broken. They should not be confused with panty-wearing 80 year old Chinese men, despite the apparent similarity, as a TF would never actually wear panties without a generous financial offer or restraining order.
True Story
One time a shemale tried to pick me up while I was down town. She/he/it macked on me with boring conversation with such lines as, "sooooooo, what are doing tonight?" until I just left. She/he/it left me with the poetic line, "FINE! Get YOURSELF off tonight!!!" I took this as a challenge, so I porked her/his/its stinky orifice in the bed of my pick'em up truck whilst bums and hipsters looked on in horror.
They can't get health insurance
At about 14 minutes into Michael Moore's movie Sicko, it gives a list of things that would make you ineligible for health insurance. Three of those were Asperger's syndrome, autism, and gender identity disorder.
Web comics and transsexuals
It is a well-known fact that all web cartoonists are transexuals, because it is a good way to get attention when you aren't funny. If The Wotch and El Goonish Shrive aren't enough bad tranny humor for you, see JDR and D. C. Simpson.
Common elements of tranny web comics include sensitive and beautiful trannies getting beaten up by jocks and the firm belief that any girl that can do math is really a boy and that any boy that doesn't like sports is really a girl.
The Wikipedia Tranny Cabal
- Wikipedia:User:AlexR—controls and edits Wikipedia's transsexual articles. Not an admin yet, but still awful enough to prevent any pictures from appearing in the articles. AlexR is actually FTM, a rarity in today's internets.
- Wikipedia:User:Ambi, now known as Wikipedia:User:Rebecca—an administrator who controls and edits wikipedia's transsexual articles. When AlexR took a six-month wikibreak, Ambi remained to stop any pictures from appearing (serious business—no lollercausts).
- Wikipedia:User:Kelly Martin—actually a heterosexual man (see above).
- Wikipedia:User:Phroziac
- Wikipedia:User:Jokestress (ED article here)—He is particularly proud of his part in producing Transamerica, which stars a woman as a shemale (no lollercausts please)!
Phroziac's mother knows!
<Phroziac> omfg, my mom is such a snoop <Phroziac> she thinks i want to be a shemale <Phroziac> because i'm listed as one on....i assume she looked at encyclopedia dramatica <Phroziac> i didn't fucking put it there
Notorious Shemales
- Ann Coulter
- YukiKazamura
- JDR
- Trap-kun
- Amalea
- Aeverine Nieves
- Lady GaGa
- Line Trap
- Darktrap
- Xeni Jardin
- YOU
- Daxflame
- freedom74
- Flat Chan
Your Journey to Womanhood
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Pre-op
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OH GOD
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Vaginoplasty
Gallery
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Even if he'd tucked that damn thing in, he'd fool no one.
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Facebook ads targeting their gender-confused audience.
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shemale or geek?
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In Soviet Russia, Girl fucks you!
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Another possibility for a prospective tranny is a compromise such as this.
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Cock goes where? But is it a trap?!
See Also
- Dickgirl
- Girlvinyl
- FTM
- Hir
- Kathy Griffin
- Kytalise
- Lb-69
- Penis Pump, a trolling group who worship shemales
- Shaye Saint John
- Transgender Day of Remembrance
- Transvestite
- You - The shemale that keeps on giving
External links
- Cops: McDonald's Workers Attacked by Cross-Dressers
- Trap Thread #1 The first epic trap thread.
- Trap Thread #2 The second epic trap thread.
- Trap Thread #3 The third epic trap thread. It is now a provable fact that the majority of males that visit /b/ desire to be females.
- Shemale Free shemale porn
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