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| [[File:Emery_Bowman_911.jpg|300px|right]]
| | Emery Bowman is my son, fuck you, you bullies |
| '''Emery Bowman''' is a chubby pig-nosed [[13-year-old boy|teenage boy]] who is known for being two-faced and [[trying too hard]] to fit in with the edgetards of [[The Ranting Community]]. He lives in a boring ghost town known as [[Shit no one cares about|Maple City, Kansas]], where he spends most of his time online fishing for attention. Due to his loneliness, Emery has a very clingy personality, and will naturally latch on to people he meets like a dog humping his owner's leg. Emery desperately craves the approval of others, and is known to shift his views on life to match those of the [[Social Justice Warriors|people he's closest to]], even if it means betraying some people along the way.
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| ==[[Edgy|Edginess]]==
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| Emery is the type of person who thinks swearing and suicide jokes make him the funniest human being alive. He'll pretend to cut himself, harass girls on [[Facebook]], and even take pictures of himself naked. (This will come into play later.) More often than not, people who are his "friends" will generally be the butt of the joke. He has made fun of them by making suicide jokes to them, invading personal privacy and really pushing the boundaries of an ordinary friendship. In spite of this, his friends will forgive him and continue to enable his behavior. Emery used to have dozens of YouTuber parodies on his channel, where he'd fail at improv and replace part of the YouTuber's name with "shit." Emery eventually realized how cancerous these videos were and removed them all.
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| [[File:Emery_Dance.gif|right|260px]]
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| [[File:Emery_Bowman_Ladies_Man.jpg|thumbnail|center|600px|'''Emery Bowman is a true ladies boy ''']]
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| [[File:Emery is Islamaphobic too.jpg|thumbnail|300px|right|Emery also thinks Islamaphobia is a good thing because of a YouTube video NateTalksToYou made counting down Quaran verses. How embarrassing]]
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| Emery also thinks blurting out random catchphrases makes him look clever, and not autistic in the slightest.
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| <center>{{morphquote|mqtest|background-color:#ffffff; width: 600px;|font-weight: bold;
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| |What in God's vagina.|
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| |Anywhore.|
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| |Consume.|
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| |[[Ayy lmao]]|Emery loves forced memes.
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| |I am h.|
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| |EARTHQUAKE WARNING!|
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| |Sometimes, I get this feeling like I wanna eat cute things|
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| |Islamaphobia may be justified|
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| |God is dad|
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| }}</center>
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| [[File:Emery_An_Hero.jpg|thumbnail|400px|center|[[An hero]]]]
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| ==Not So Slim Shady==
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| [[File:Emery_Rapper.jpg|thumbnail|280px|right|iMustDestroyAll and ReaperTakinOver react to Emery's rap album.]]
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| Like any other middle-class white boy, Emery is a big fan of [[Eminem]]. He owns an Eminem poster, attempted to start a rap career, and even went so far as to bleach his hair. Well, at least he's not a [[juggalo]].
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| [[File:Emernem.jpg|thumbnail|320px|left|[[Hitler]] would be proud.]]
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| <center>'''Advice For Emery From Filthy Frank'''</center>
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| <center>{{Videoframe|Rap|background-color: pink;border:.5em solid black;margin:0 auto 1em auto;text-align:center;|font-weight:bold;
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| |<youtube>H6iefP8lf3o</youtube>
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| }}
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| </center>
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| [[File:Emery_Eminem_Poster.jpg|thumbnail|400px|center|Eminem poster]]
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| ==[[Pussy|Ass Kissing]]==
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| Emery Bowman's sycophantic behavior has made him lose many people's respect (if he had their respect in the first place). He's like that obsessive girlfriend that calls you every 5 minutes; the only difference is you're not going to let him give you head. Emery is known to spam people's inboxes trying to flatter them, and then beg them to join his Skype calls. He'll also attack people just to gain someone else's approval. Even after betraying somebody, Emery will play it off like he's innocent and plead for their forgiveness.
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| [[File:Emery_Begs_Nate.PNG|thumbnail|300px|right|NOTICE ME SENPAI]]
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| {{Videoframe|Obsessed|background-color: pink;border:.5em solid black;margin:0 auto 1em auto;text-align:center;|font-weight:bold;
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| |<youtube>Ji8e1UTm5Zg</youtube>
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| ;Dear Paul, I wrote you but you still ain't callin'
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| |<youtube>fYH0xPxCC0s</youtube>
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| }}
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| ==Emery's [[Trolling]] Backfires==
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| Last Thursday, Emery was in a Skype call with his "friends" [[fat|Levon]] and [[Scottish|BurnCoalition]]. Levon thought it would be lulzy to send RanterInShade's parents a link to Shade's YouTube channel, since they would make him delete his account if they found out about his videos. Emery, being the suck-up he is, was easily convinced to do this. However, Levon used a nude picture of Emery as blackmail if Emery told anyone that Levon had a part in it. Then Emery sent a screenshot of the messages he sent RanterInShade's parents to Shades himself.
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| [[File:Emery_Trolls_RanterInShades.jpg|500px|center]]
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| [[File:PedoBear_Seal_of_Approval.jpg|thumbnail|200px|left|Pedobear approves.]]
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| Just to be on the safe side, Levon sent the nude picture to [[Brian Mueller|Razorath]] and told him to use it as blackmail. Razorath decided to make Emery the butt of the joke, so he sent the picture to [[Flips|TheRandomGangsta]] and RanterInShades. Then as an act of revenge, RanterInShades and OfficialGATG shared the picture on Facebook. Both of them were so certain to get back at Emery that they almost forgot that the photo contained child porn until they were told numerous times, causing Shades to delete the post in hope that the pain would go away. After being embarrassed by every one in the [[Losers|Ranting Community]], even having a video made against them by [[Fat-fuck|VlogRays]] explaining to them that it isn't a good idea to post photos of underaged people online, even if they are morons. Shades and OfficialGATG realized that this was a pretty hefty thing to walk off so just so he didn't feel alone, Shades and OfficialGATG placed the blame onto their "friends" to save face.
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| Emery later tried to apologize to Shades, but Shades told him to fuck off.
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| [[File:Emery_Nude.jpg|thumbnail|250px|left]]
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| [[File:RanterInShades_Tells_Off_Emery.jpg|thumbnail|600px|center]]
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| ==Misc.==
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| [[File:Emery_In_Trouble.jpg|thumbnail|300px|right|Emery in trouble with the law.]]
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| {{cg||Misc|center|<gallery perrow="5">
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| File:Emery_Bedroom.jpg|Emery's dump of a bedroom.
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| File:Emery_Bowman_Home.jpg|Middle of nowhere.
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| File:Emery_Bowman_Pink_Hair.jpg|Pink hair.
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| File:Emery_Fat.jpg|Fat
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| File:Emery_Mom.jpg|[[Cockmongler|Emery's mom.]]
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| </gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
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| File:Emery_Messages_Aug_10_2014.jpg|Emery goes crying to [[Undertakerfreak1127]].
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| File:Emery_Messages_Aug_26_2014.jpg|Emery "trolls" Someguy827.
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| File:Emery_Messages_Aug_29_2014.jpg|Emery "trolls" [[TakeShotAction]].
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| File:Emery_Messages_Sept_13_2014.jpg|
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| File:Emery_Bowman_Brother.jpg|Emery and his brother.
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| </gallery>
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| }}
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| == See Also ==
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| * [[The Ranting Community]]
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| * [[Brian Mueller]]
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| * [[TheTruthHurtsNetwork]]
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| * [[Dying alone]]
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| * [[13-year-old boy]]
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| {{YouTube Ranters}}
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| {{ytseries}}
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| [[category:people]]
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Emery Bowman is my son, fuck you, you bullies
