imported>POKEY THE PENGUIN |
|
| Line 1: |
Line 1: |
| [[Image:Kirtaner.jpg|right|thumb|Kirtaner being a vacuous shithead.]]
| | {{banned|being Kirtaner}} |
| [[Image:Kirtlove.jpg|thumb|How kirtaner tells her he loves her.]]
| |
| | |
| {{lj|user=Kirtaner}} is a Canadian? WE WILL FIND OUT TOGETHER. Online Kirt has also been identified as a piece of [[shit]] [[faggot]] who runs [[420chan]], and in real life as '''Aubrey Cottle''', a hopeless drug addict. | |
| | |
| WHAT A FINE DEN OF INIQUITY! POWYS's only notable actions in life revolve around "ironically" being [[gay]], possessing/creating NEW RUG FOR THE FOYER WHEN YOU POINT IT AT AN OBJECT, IT UNITES BEING AND NON-BEING! giving [[butt]]plugs to jailbait on a first date, and generally being a stupid turd. One of the most memorable things he did was abuse drugs and then impersonate goatse in a live showing for his pedophile anime irc buddy [[Shii]]. Immediately after this he also took pictures of himself sniffing his fingers.
| |
| | |
| When not taking pictures of himself being wacky and ironic and tearing his asshole apart, he can be found posting in [http://kirtaner.livejournal.com/322.html his livejournal] (LONG GONE NOW) about abusing drugs and subsequently having sex with any passing bodily orifice. He doesn't seem to mention, however, that he still lives with his mom, and remains [[Basement-dweller|unemployed]], hence the frequent calls for donations on 420chan.
| |
| | |
| Recently, Kirtaner has hooked up with Yoko-Ono-esque [[Sparto]]. It's the standard internet relationship: friendless-in-IRL, personality-dysfunctional attention whore sluts it up for nerds to get more of the delicious attention she so desperately craves; attention whore latches on to powerful e-penis wielder; attention whore receives modship of shitty website; attention whore becomes e-penis wielder's "gf 4evr". The relationship is scheduled to end in a few months the same way they always do: attention whore turns out to be a dude, e-penis wielder bans attention whore forever, we pretend like it never happened. So far, however, they've somehow managed to stay together for [[At least 100 years ago|2 years.]]
| |
| | |
| == Internet presence ==
| |
| | |
| When not having his pipes cleaned out by black dicks, he is usually posting on his message board "[[420chan]]", a haven for maladjusted pedo anime faggots like himself and Marshall Banana. Prior to this, he ran the website [http://www.spyderlake.com spyderlake] which in turn illegally ran a server for the gook MMORPG ''Ragnarok Online'' because he ''really fucking loves Japan'' and is apparently suffering from a very special type of [[AIDS]] that makes him forget that Rag is from Korea. Srsly
| |
| | |
| Due to the stupid cunt leaving his image directories open, child porn (The homo claims it was actually xenogears loli but no one believes him because he is Kirtaner) was found on his webspace and he was banned from [[Something Awful]] after forum members led a crusade to get him and his retarded partner in crime Marshall Banana permabanned. This act was somehow a crushing blow to his self-esteem that turned him into a bigger introvert. In addition to this, there were pictures of him kissing men at anime conventions, [[Pro-ana|proudly displaying his malnourished and horrifyingly thin frame]], and the aforementioned pictures of him "ironically" jamming his hands into his goddamn asshole.
| |
| | |
| It has been alleged that Kirtaner had asked other [[faggots|goons]] to choke him during SA meetups. He also tends to do various things with his ass during Stickam sessions, such as shoving a bottle in it, pulling it wide open a la goatse, or trying to replicate loopback.jpg.
| |
| | |
| Kirtaner was recently outed as abysmally shit SA poster Chroanopol, and was permabanned. He was recently outed again as 'terrakin' (an anagram of Kirtaner) and booted yet again.
| |
| | |
| On May 26th, 2010, '''He was outed again as another shit SA poster, BABY FlNLAND.''' (Notice the l instead of an I) Registered on March 8th, 2008, proving yet again, that Kirtaner is still butt-hurt about [[truth|SA's accusations of pedophilia]].
| |
| | |
| Kirtaner is also a former member of the BatJew forums. He was frequently mocked there just as he is mocked across the internets. Kirtypoo fanboys claim Kirtaner is [[friend zone|a very good friend]] of [[Moot]]'s and [[W.T. Snacks]] as well as one of the very first channers, even stealing the original 30get on [[4chan]] when it was first started up.
| |
| | |
| ==lol [[SWATting|SWATTED]]==
| |
| [[File:KirtSWAT.png|thumb|200px|His name is Aubrey and he didn't get much sleep on [[last_thursday|Thursday]].]]
| |
| Apparently Kirtypoo [http://www.citynews.ca/news/news_22727.aspx got raided] in a pretty [[lulz|lulzy]] raid by a good [[Aush0k|friend]] from [[Australia|Ausfalia]]. Police received a 911 call telling them to rush to the family's apartment, where an armed man was reportedly holding hostages and firing off bullets.
| |
| | |
| {{Squote|I got out of bed, I open up my bedroom door, walked over to the front door and had an automatic combat shotgun in my face. When you're getting woken up at 4:30 in the morning by a whole bunch of cops with automatic weapons and then finding out that they've blocked off the entire street outside - pretty unsettling.|Kirtaner}}
| |
| | |
| | |
| {{Squote|It turns out the [[Loser|young man runs his own online chat website called 420chan]] and has been harassed by someone [[Redneck Wonderland|Down Under]] who has crashed his service, written threatening notes and [[LOL|generally been impossible to deal with]].|City News}}
| |
| | |
| It is worthy to mention that the idiot who wrote the sentence below, (See: "The moron that did it..) did not take into consideration the fact that the arrest of DShocker occured prior to the "SWATting" incident of Kirtaner, and thus should [[Die in a fire|diaf]].
| |
| | |
| The moron that did it was actually from Mississippi. He spent 6 months in juvie. After that he came back to the internet and was mocked by everyone for being the idiot that got caught.
| |
| | |
| ==The Retaner==
| |
| Around the late 2010s, Kirtaner started working with [[The Jew York Times|the press]], wanking himself off about how he claims to have [[lie|founded]] the great [[Skids|ahnomynoose leegen]], and [[Orgy|joined forces]] with [[Hotwheels|cripplewheels]] to help [[Rape|hack]] [[Jim Watkins|Jim Watkins]] and the league of dumb [[old people]] he scammed. He also has a general hateboner for any site that makes fun of lawlcows, and swears to take down the [[Kiwifarms|foxdick farms]] <s>because they archived chat logs of him trading CP with people on irc</s> because of great heroic justice.
| |
| | |
| When he's not being a fagtivist, he's bellyaching about his shitty foot, and his whore girlfriend that left him with a bastard child. Here's a compilation of his pathetic whaling that some sick fuck threw together. [[Fap|Enjoy]].
| |
| | |
| <center><youtube>CFljGdqaXeM</youtube></center>
| |
| | |
| ==Kirtaner's felonies are Fed approved==
| |
| Last Thursday, a group of terrorist truckers took over the capital city of Canada, threatening "our values" and "our democracy" (and also protesting for an end to coronavirus vaccine mandates and passports). GoFundMe had already kicked the truckers from its site because they are terrorists. How dare they protest and demand freedom in such a way! As we all learned from the "Summer of Love" 2020, the correct way for the terrorist truckers to protest is with arson, vandalism, and murder. A Christian version called GiveSendGo had filled the void after the Nazi terrorist truckers were booted from Gofundme. Within days, Kirtaner hacked their website and stole all their Christianity as well as the names of 90,000 donors which were promptly leaked by the totally reputable Jewish media. This was Kirtaner's opportunity to [[signal|virtue signal]] that it was indeed him who hacked a bunch of Christians who were obviously racist terrorist Nazis anyway so who cares whether they got hacked? Kirtaner does:
| |
| | |
| [[File:Kirtaner -3Hr6rC4AOVuE4V7Y.mp4|center]]
| |
| | |
| {{clear}}
| |
| | |
| ==Gallery==
| |
| {{Collapsegallery|<big>KOO KOO CRAZY KIRTANER</big>|cg1|center|<gallery>
| |
| Image:Kirtaner_in_a_skirt.jpg|Skirt Kirt
| |
| File:kirtaner I showed you my dick.jpg|I showed u my goatse
| |
| Image:3496033510_b0be713a2f.jpg|Hottie?
| |
| File:Kirtaner confirming the existence of pedophile board.jpeg|Kirt confirming the existence of /pedo/
| |
| Image:KIRTSE.jpg|Kirtypoo in all his glory.
| |
| </gallery>|<gallery>
| |
| File:lowtax permabanning kirtaner.png|Finally [[Lowtax]] does something right
| |
| File:kirt by a kiwifarms user.jpeg|A Kiwifarmer rendition
| |
| File:Kirtaner deadbeat dad gofundme bawww.jpeg|Kirtaner e-begs for meth money on behalf of his son
| |
| File:KIRTANER DO IT FAGGOT.jpeg|DO IT FAGGOT
| |
| </gallery>|border=black|color=white}}
| |
| | |
| ==See Also==
| |
| * [[420chan]]
| |
| * [[Aush0k]]
| |
| * [[Sparto]]
| |
| | |
| ==External Links==
| |
| * [http://www.stickam.com/profile/travish Kirtaner's Stickam]
| |
| * [http://www.twitter.com/kirtaner Kirtaner's Twitter]
| |
| * [[wikipedia:Aubrey Cottle|His Wikipedia article]]
| |
| * [https://kiwifarms.net/threads/kirtaner-aubrey-cottle.84714/ Kiwi Farms thread]
| |
| | |
| {{chans}}
| |
| {{Leaders of Anonymous}}
| |
| | |
| [[Category:2008]]
| |
| [[Category:LJ Users]]
| |
| [[Category:People]]
| |
