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E-penis: Difference between revisions

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An '''E-penis''' or '''E-pen0r''' is the virtual power someone has through control over others through computers as long as that control does not extend to [[IRL|real life]], like doing hacking that causes you to gain real money. Simply put, E-penis is a measure of how much power you have on the [[internets]]. E-penis can be from power from controlling a [[BBS]], [[chat room]], [[ISP]], [[live journal]], [[message board]], [[website]], or [[wiki]]. It can come from being powerful in a game (whether from wasting their life away to gain skill or by cheating) or being the leader of a big group in said game. It can also be from the old-fashioned past-time of mailbombing; maybe even Denial of Service attacks over IRC (large scale DoS get you sent to [[prison]]). Pretty much, the larger your E-penis is, [[Fact|the less you're really worth in real life.]] Many people have fallen victim to bragging about their e-pen0r size and listing their "e-complishments" to their trolls, [[Asking for it|inviting and even challenging others to take them down a notch or two]].
E-penis has and always will be a source of drama. The examples are too numerous to list.
== Psychology ==
The E-penis is based off [[E-psychiatrist]] Freud's theory of [[penis]] envy. Freudian states that [[women]] on the [[internets]] lack the [[Rich and beautiful|powerful]], strong genitalia of a [[man]] and therefore make it up by [[whore|whoring]] themselves to other giant pen0r-wielders.  Conversely, [[13 year old boys]] play ''[[Starcraft]]'' and [[mod]] on shitty [[forums]], so there's two different spectrums to go off of.  However, [[trap]]s have been shown to have bigger E-Penes than men and women.
== Examples ==
[[Image:Epeencontest.jpg|250px|thumb|A chart measuring the e-cocks of several web celebrities]]
* [[Newgrounds]]: Newgrounds is a site notorious for its e-penis sucking. Usually n00bs like/have to suck the mods/regulars e-penis to even get a baby step anywhere.
* [[FanFiction.Net]]: Is a site that thrives on e-penis suckings. It's one giant circle jerk of telling people how awesome someone's story is, regardless of how terrible it is. Most fan art web sites/forums fall into this category as well. (See below.)
* [[LiveJournal]]: If you've read one of the numerous internet blogs on how to draw animefurfag eyes, you can receive E-penis massages here.
* [[GameFAQs]]: Apparently, no matter how noobish you are everywhere else, they'll give your e-penis a handjob as long as you've been there for a while (and make shitty attempts at humor).
* [[DeviantArt]]: [[Nick Simmons|l2trace]]
* [[reddit]]: A place to gain e-points for telling a popular opinion. basically a big circlejerk of confirmation bias.
* [[Last.FM]]: Announce to the world that you listen to music and have your password in a public database.
* [[YouTube]]: Also thrives on e-penis suckings like it's their second job, filled with more and more collab videos and fame leechers.
* [[TGWTG]]: Collabs and Circlejerks: The Website.
* [[League Of Legends]]: E-penis is the whole and only point of playing this shit game for more than 2 hours in your lifetime.
== Gallery ==
<gallery>
File:Epenis.jpg|This is what you do when you announce it
File:small.jpg|A good sign of fail at internets
File:OldDirtyBtard Twitter epenis.png|I just got out of the ocean tho. Challenge [[ODB|me]] @ http://www.epenis.nl
</gallery>
== Related Articles ==
* [[Malber]]
* [[Cock]]
* [[Remedy]]
* [[Veteran]]
== External Link ==
* [[Wikipedia:Dog%27s_bollocks_(typography)|<big>''':&mdash;'''</big>]]
{{stub}}
<s>^^lulz</s> HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS
[[Category:Penis]]
[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]
[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]
[[Category:Dying Alone]]

Revision as of 21:36, 7 June 2017