Chaos wraith x

Some dude who might or might not be the guy we're talking about.

LJ user Chaos_wraith_x was, until recently, a boring and unimportant member of the Internets community. He still is, but now he has an article. Why? Well, he managed to piss off Son of art, renowned pseudo-pagan and King of the Sockpuppets. As Dani Faulk or Kevin and Kat can tell you, the consequences of pissing off Son of art are dire. Since he has nothing to do but eat off ugly women's money and masturbate into his owl helmet, he has the time and means to generate massive amounts of verbose, overdone, made-up bullshit, which would be fine except none of it is even remotely funny. The original version tells the sad tale: Robin Artisson is the cancer that is killing ED, and articles like this are why. We've tried to preserve the original character and charm of Mr. Artisson's work, just so you can appreciate his sparkling wit and excellent graphic design sensibilities.

A bad photoshop of Mr. Bean? I don't even know.

Dramatis Resume Virtualis

Dramatis what? Who writes this shit?

Anyway, the anti-lulz started when Son of Art, under the name owl_clan, decided it was time to take on those damn Muslims, since everybody's been giving them a free pass so far. His post was a marvel of tl;dr, notable for the author's complete inability to say one funny thing about the hilariousness of some bitch going to prison over a teddy bear. The local Dark Pagans got really, really mad and totally put a hex on him, or at least they will once they get their DVD players working again so they can look up the relevant scenes in The Craft and Teen Witch.

In response, chaos_wraith_x did a lot of yelling and Son of Art yelled back, and then eventually this article was created. Mori deleted it, because she deletes everything, which led Arty to call her Chaos's ghey lover and then make vague scaaaaary threats.

Arty keeps coming back to edit this article with various sockpuppets, no matter how many times the mods raep him, which is the single best argument against open account creation on ED.

Son of art is obsessed with nigra loli. Seriously, I edited out at least 100 references to underage brown sugar in this article.

Timeless Wisdom from a Fucking Troll

See, the funny thing about LiveJournal is that it assigns semi-random numbers to each journal entry, with each entry having a higher number than the previous one. So if, say, darkpaganism is currently up to entry #571218, and you've got a troll inserting links to entry #1265919, like this you know that entry probably doesn't exist.

This article has been edited to remove a shitload of tl;dr made-up shit from LJ entries that not only don't exist now, but have never existed. Dear Son of art: SCREENCAPS OR GTFO.

LJ entries also do not begin with zero, dumbfuck.

weeaboo art plus drama queen faggotry= INTERNETS COURT

This is where we make fun of some dude for saying random unfunny shit

	“	I'm also a profound coffee addict and am known to drink 6-8 cups a day. I'm no Godot, but I am a sucker for the hazelnut blend. I tend to divide my lack of talent between a number of pursuits including writing, painting and composing. In light of this constant change of aspiration, I've yet to meet with any real success.	„
	—chaos_wraith_x, found here

	“	I'm a guilty party responsible for internetscourt, where we pretend to condemn people to internet jail for hilarity. I'm at a point where I still don't know what I want to do in life, but so far the consensus seems to be that it will involve an evil scheme and robots.	„
	—chaos_wraith_x, found here

GB2 MICROWAVE

Also, because nobody has ever had a fucked-up dream before in the history of the universe, let's throw in this random crap from his lame website:

	“	I don’t remember my dreams very often. So I feel the need to share this one with EVERYONE. EVER. I was in the kitchen of a place that wasn’t my old house, or any old apartment of mine, but it still felt kind of familiar. While in the kitchen, I heard on the radio that Jesus was out killing everyone who had cancer–I then later saw him flying around outside from a window in the kitchen and decided that I was going to trap him in my microwave. Which I did. So, Jesus was trapped in my microwave, though I hadn’t actually pressed any of the buttons to activate it. I had come to the conclusion that he would escape if I turned it on. I put a little piece of paper with “Do Not Touch!” over the panel of buttons on the side. That’s when Lisa Simpson came and told me that we need to convince Jesus to help us cure cancer, instead of killing Jesus or keeping him locked away in a microwave forever. I informed Lisa that she was trying entirely too hard to be a good person, and was obviously overcompensating for something she had done in her past. I also told her shut up. Then I woke up.	„
	—OMG CALL THE DRAMA SQUAD

The Internets Court is Serious Business

Chaos_Wraith_X prosecutes the stupid_free lj community in this "transcript", and really thinks that he's clever by bringing up godwin's law.

" stupid_free has been charged with being "cyber bullies".

The counsel in this case is:
chaos_wraith_x as the prosecutor.
azeraphael as the defense.

What follows a transcript of the proceedings.

[08:47 PM] chaos_wraith_x: Due to moral reasoning, the plaintiff drops all charges.
[08:47 PM] chaos_wraith_x: I can't argue on behalf of a furry.
[08:47 PM] azeraphael: IN SO MUCH AS --ERK!
[08:47 PM] chaos_wraith_x: That's like Hitler trying to argue on behalf of a Jew.
[08:47 PM] wooldridge: GODWIN'S LAW
[08:47 PM] wooldridge: TRIAL OVER

Result:
All charges dropped."

The stenographer would like to note that whoever originally wrote this article fails at wiki-markup. BREAK TAGS ARE NOT TOYS.

The Stupid Free community will never be stupid free while chaos_wraith_x is a member LOL LOOK WHAT I DID THERE, IT'S A PUN

Chaos_wraith_x BAN HAMMERS our_lady_rissa before his faggot court

"Recently our_lady_rissa was banned from my personal journal, as a policy enforcement. She's decided to appear before the court today to appeal her ban.

Specifically, the policy violation is as follows:

Policy 225 Any user posting the merits of Naruto, or making profound use of weeaboo mannerisms (including the rampant butchering of English and Japanese involved in that hideous SUGOI-KAWAII-DESU mix), will be immediately and permanently banned. Memes are exempt from this policy."

ED Court later upheld this ruling, because weeaboos suck. The author of this article, however, was fined for contempt of court by using the fucking bold tag.

LOOK IT'S BUILDINGS

The Web-trail of hilarity that will ensure Robin never gets a job outside of Taco Bell

HAY LOOK GUYS, IT'S BROKEBACK LJ LOLZ.

What follows are the accounts that Robin Artisson is convinced belong to Chaos wraith x. Since Robin himself has over 9000 sockpuppet accounts, plus his meatpuppet followers, it's natural that he might get the lines blurred between "friendship" and "people inside your head."

• woolridge (some poor dumb fucker who used his IRL name and got mistaken for Chaos wraith, lol)
• chaos-wraith
• wraith_x
• chaos_wraith_fc
• lumacent
• chaos-wraith-x
• plinko (um, I think this is a chick)
• heresiarch
• chapinhuskiey
• summerhusky
• michaelkano
• uglystupid
• sunriseagain
• angelofadia
• greyfadedrain
• deliriousecho
• dummy01
• owl_clan no wait, that's Robin

So, basically, half of fucking LiveJournal. The other half, of course, belong to Arty himself.

HEY ROBIN: FAIL MACROS ARE FAIL

I AM WATCHING YOU ROBIN