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Black Friday: Difference between revisions

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{{notice|Please add more hilarious racism because you are obviously a comedic prodigy.}}
''"Black Friday" redirects here.  Maybe you were looking for [[Rebecca Black]]?''
''"Black Friday" redirects here.  Maybe you were looking for [[Rebecca Black]]?''


'''Black Friday''' was traditionally the Friday following [[Thanksgiving|Thanksgiving Thursday]], but as of 2011, [[Wal-Mart|Wallyworld]] decided to move it forward to 10:00 pm on Thanksgiving Thursday.
[[File:Black-friday-mobs.png|Get the '''FUCK''' out of my way|thumb]]
'''Black Friday''' was traditionally the Friday following [[Thanksgiving|Thanksgiving Thursday]], but as of 2011, [[Wal-Mart|Wallyworld]] decided to move it backward to 10:00 pm on Thanksgiving Thursday.


== A Brief History of Black Friday ==
Black Friday is the Friday after Thanksgiving. It is most popular for the human stampedes caused by [[Nintendo Switch]]es in which the tradition is to trample at least 4 elderly women per Walmart in order to get a Nintendo before them. Occasionally moms fail to reach that coveted Switch before the other moms which results in such feelings as not getting to play video games right away. In America, this results in a high rate of going outside sometimes. A little known fact, it was created by the [[Jews]] as another scheme to get more golds.
<center><youtube>dMH6d4Adm9U</youtube><br />'''Kill me.'''</center>


[[100 years ago]], when [[niggers]] were still [[slaves]], the white man was allowed to take a four-day break from working for Thanksgiving while blackies made their delicious Thanksgiving [[chikins|birds]].  But then [[Martin_Luther_King,_Jr.|Black Jesus]] freed the coons.  While porch monkeys everywhere celebrated their freedom on Thanksgiving Friday, they suddenly found themselves without jobs on the following Friday.  Because the white man was still at home enjoying his hard-earned four-day vacation, the negroes decided they would break into the closed stores and takes TVs and bikes (they didn't do it on Saturday or Sunday because they were still niggers, and still wanted to take the weekend off).
==Customary Black Friday Activities==
[[File:Blackfriday.jpg|thumb|right|In stores now, leftists!]]


But the white man realized he could [[profit]]; after all, if the niggers wanted to go to stores on the Friday after Thanksgiving, then probably others would, too.  To make shopping on this day more enticing, those capitalist pig [[Americunts]] began advertising "steal deals" (named such in honor of the brownies who started this annual shitfest activity) on Black Friday.
== Customary Black Friday Activities ==
As Black Friday was started by the groids, all Black Friday activities are modernized versions of customary activities in [[Africa|AIDSland]].  Such as:
As Black Friday was started by the groids, all Black Friday activities are modernized versions of customary activities in [[Africa|AIDSland]].  Such as:
* Breaking down doors and window
* Breaking down doors and window
* [http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2008448574_shop290.html Dancing on cops]
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20081202112512/http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2008448574_shop290.html Dancing on cops]
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeSgBL7gpAk Dancing on niglets]
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeSgBL7gpAk Dancing on niglets]
* Grabbing expensive TVs
* [[Looting|Grabbing expensive TVs]]
* [http://www.theepochtimes.com/n2/united-states/black-friday-marred-by-trampling-thefts-again-46580.html Hijacking cars] (see also [[GTA]])
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20120303215029/http://www.theepochtimes.com/n2/united-states/black-friday-marred-by-trampling-thefts-again-46580.html Hijacking cars] (see also [[GTA]])
* [http://www.startribune.com/business/133803318.html Complaining about having to work]
* [http://www.startribune.com/business/133803318.html Complaining about having to work]
* [http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/shoppers-nevada-new-jersey-killed-black-friday-article-1.2887072 Dying for bargains]
==See Also==


== See Also ==
*[[The_Great_Thread_Scare_of_Friday_13th|Friday the 13th]]


[[The_Great_Thread_Scare_of_Friday_13th|Friday the 13th]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]

Latest revision as of 11:05, 28 February 2022

Please add more hilarious racism because you are obviously a comedic prodigy.


"Black Friday" redirects here. Maybe you were looking for Rebecca Black?

Get the FUCK out of my way

Black Friday was traditionally the Friday following Thanksgiving Thursday, but as of 2011, Wallyworld decided to move it backward to 10:00 pm on Thanksgiving Thursday.

Black Friday is the Friday after Thanksgiving. It is most popular for the human stampedes caused by Nintendo Switches in which the tradition is to trample at least 4 elderly women per Walmart in order to get a Nintendo before them. Occasionally moms fail to reach that coveted Switch before the other moms which results in such feelings as not getting to play video games right away. In America, this results in a high rate of going outside sometimes. A little known fact, it was created by the Jews as another scheme to get more golds.


Kill me.

Customary Black Friday Activities

In stores now, leftists!

As Black Friday was started by the groids, all Black Friday activities are modernized versions of customary activities in AIDSland. Such as:

See Also

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