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| | | #REDIRECT[[419 Nigerian Email Scams]] |
| [[Image:Mozambique.jpg|thumb|Average citizens of Mozambique, this group of friends hangs out after work in gazebos to play dah gee-tah and rape white women (also pictured)]] | |
| Mystical Mozambique is a place where [[Purelily]] regrettably forgot to register the copyrights on all of her images. Here, framed 10x8 originals of [[Purelily]] plus a wealth of knock-offs and derivatives are available in street stalls and ramshackle trading posts for the equivalent of less than one [[United States|US]] penny ($0.01). Yes, this is a land where the market enforces the true values of items.
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| Life expectancy at birth is 37.1 years and the GDP per capita is $1200 per year (which might buy 120,000 framed 10x8s of [[Purelily]]'s photography but really isn't enough to live on). Please send money.
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| ... and they do. Mozambique pulled a big [[Nigeria|419 scam]] on every country in the [[Commonwealth]] by getting admitted in 1995, despite having no historical connection with the [[UK|British Empire or United Kingdom]]. A bunch of jerk [[Politics|politicians]] just wanted to give the Mozambican Prez and his pals lots of [[You|your]] money if you happen to be from a [[Commonwealth]] country. Still, there is a price: at the end of every term, the outgoing Prez is loaded into a plane, which dives from a great height onto the island of Madagascar in homage to Buddy Holly and other [[Suicide|dead rock stars]].
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| <h1>National Anthem of Mozambique</h1>
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| I like to spend some time in Mozambique.<br>
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| The sunny sky is aqua blue<br>
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| And all the couples dancing cheek to cheek<br>
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| It's very nice to stay a week or two<br>
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| And fall in love just me and you.<br>
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| There's a lot of pretty girls in Mozambique<br>
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| And plenty time for good romance<br>
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| And everybody likes to stop and speak<br>
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| To give the special one you seek a chance<br>
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| Or maybe say hello with just a glance.<br>
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| Lying next to her by the ocean<br>
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| Reaching out and touching her hand<br>
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| Whispering your secret emotion<br>
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| Magic in a magical land.<br>
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| And when it's time for leaving Mozambique<br>
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| To say goodbye to sand and sea<br>
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| You turn around to take a final peek<br>
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| And you see why it's so unique to be<br>
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| Among the lovely people living free<br>
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| Upon the beach of sunny Mozambique.
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| {{Commonwealth}}
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| {{Afro}}
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| [[Category:Locations]]
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