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Donald Trump: Difference between revisions

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{{FactAlert|Donald Trump bought a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.}}
[[File:DonaldTrump-HomeAlone2.jpg|right|thumb|251px|Picture of Donald J. Trump, who is an average human being, helping out a perfectly normal human child.]]
[[File:Couldnt_Stop_Trump.jpg|center]]


{{quote|I would look her in that fat, ugly face of hers and say 'Rosie, you're fired!'|Donald Trump}}
'''Donald John Trump''' is a [[You're A Fucking White Male|white American male]] and the 45th and 47th President of the [[United States]]. He was born on June 14th, 1946, and has an estimated net worth of $5.5 billion. He is married to Melania Trump, and his children include Donald Jr., Ivanka, Eric, Tiffany, and Barron. He also appeared in the movie ''Home Alone 2'' as a friendly but otherwise average human being.


'''[[The Donald]]''', or '''Donald Trump''', is a [[Bullshit|god amongst men]]. Never half-piss around when The Donald is around cause he'll [[rape]] you for not fulling pissing around, fire you for being unproductive, sue you for libel, and pillage your women-kin. Donald Trump is a fucking genius. A fact that proves just how much of a genius The Donald is, is that he has personally gone bankrupt '''four fucking times'''. He's pissed away billions of dollars and yet people ''still'' get in line to give this [[asshole]] their money. In addition to the power to dupe non-Jews out of their money, Trump also has the ability to suspend time itself. This amazing power means that even though he continues to get older, his girlfriends never age beyond 23. This power is also known as "money," and allows even an ugly, paunchy, used car salesman like Trump to score more tail than [[you]] ever will. [[You|Fags]] at ED stand behind him every step of the way.
This is about as neutral and unbiased as we can get about him. If you want to read a completely biased and absolutely one-sided article about Trump, check out these articles:


He also has his own world renowned television show, in which he makes [[niggers]] and [[women]] do his work for him. Recently, Trump is running for [[president]] and has, surprisingly, [[Lulz|been supported by many]]. On the other hand, many [[lulz]] were had at his expense. Trump is a primordial source of [[lulz]], for example he was what caused Loki to cut off Sif's golden hair because Trump only deserves the best toupée.
* '''[[The Donald]]''' — for all the [[white nationalist]] [[Kekistan]]i [[alt-right]] [[racist]]s who voted for Trump and are therefore the reason why the US has turned into Nazi Germany 2: [[Electric Boogaloo]].
[[File:Trump Tweets.jpg|right|thumb|Just another day on Trump's Twitter account.]]
* '''[[Donald Drumpf]]''' — for all the [[white guilt]]-filled [[nu-male]] [[soyboy]]s living in [[San Francisco]] who can't understand why their screaming at the sky for hours every day didn't change anything.
[[Image:Trumphair.jpg|thumb|Sif's hair toupée.]]


== ED Approved ==
If neither of these articles suit your needs... then
{{approve|Rosie}}
[[Where do you think we are?|what are you doing here]]?


The Trump gets the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] seal of approval.
==Related Articles==
* [[Hillary Clinton]]
* [[Joe Biden]]
* [[Kamala Harris (prostitute)|Kamala Harris]]
* [[Thedonald.win]]


== Life of Leisure ==
==External Links==
[[Image:Trumpsteak.jpg|left|thumb|Proof that you can ruin food by simply pointing at it. ]]
* {{twitter|realDonaldTrump}} — His personal Twitter account
[[Image:Trumpcream.jpg|right|thumb|Trump during his [[OM NOM NOM|daily routine]].]]
* {{twitter|POTUS45}} — His official Presidential Twitter account
Trump spends his days in his [[Manhattan]] home, eating [[Delicious Cake|delicious cake]] and playing with himself. He dreams of [[Jessi Slaughter]] and [[faps]] his 24 karat gilded five inch penis. In recent years he has begun to lure in [[Shotacon|little boys]] with wads of [[money|cash]] to have sex with him. Trump, being the latent homosexual that is his agenda, is the sole financial source behind [[Boku no Pico]]. [[True|It is rumored that the plot is inspired by Trump's childhood]], but given how much Trump brags about his accomplishments, if he did have such an awesome childhood--he'd never shut the fuck up about it. He also has an extensive wardrobe, which ranges from [[nigger|green business]] [[suit]]s to [[Slut|skimpy, black]] [[panties]]. It should be noted that Trump has managed to bankrupt his entire business empire, ''twice'', the first time it was a chain of casino resorts, which even those with the most tedious grasp on economics, will tell you is '''fucking impossible''' unless you <s>are a</s> hire complete and utter retards. Both times Trump got back on his feet again, from a combination of giving blowjobs to his [[neo-con]] friends (including the Clintons) and begging for [[Bailout Plan|bailouts]] from the government. The joke is on you cause he has "fuck you" money many times over and [[poor|you are reading this not fully clothed]].
* {{facebook|DonaldTrump}} — His personal Facebook account
 
* {{facebook|POTUS45}} — His official Facebook account
== The Apprentice ==
* {{instagram|realdonaldtrump}} — His Instagram page
Trump's [[shitty|great]] reality television show is called ''The Apprentice''. The show also has a [[retarded]] brother called "The Celebrity Apprentice." This show has been home to many stars, including [[nigger|Lil' Jon]], [[Michael Jackson|La Toya Jackson]], and that one [[Fatman27183141|fat guy]]. Donald Trump has also been seen extorting money from other contestants including rock singer [[food|Meatloaf]]. It is speculated that [[Arnold Schwarzenegger]] [http://money.cnn.com/2015/09/14/media/arnold-schwarzenegger-apprentice-nbc/ will be hosting the next The Celebrity Apprentice].
* {{yt|c|UCAql2DyGU2un1Ei2nMYsqOA|Donald J Trump}} — His YouTube account
 
== 2012 Presidential Election ==
<div style="background-color:#f8f8f8; border:1px solid #dddddd; padding:.5em; margin-top:35px;" class="notice">This is a '''disambiguation''' page — <choose>
{{quote|I do not know what the 13 stripes represent [on the US flag].|Donald Trump [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/385916/may-10-2011/difference-makers---donald-trump on The Colbert Report]}}
<option>it is the best disambiguation page ever, no other disambiguation page is better than this.</option>
 
<option>you're fired.</option>
==2016 Presidential Election==
<option>we're building a disambiguation page, and Uncyclopedia will pay for it.</option>
{{Spoilers|Donnie will <s>not</s> win}}
<option>grab 'em by the disambiguation page!</option>
[[File:Donald_Trump_RAPE.png|right|thumb|Self Explanatory.]]
</choose></div>
{{quote|To understand today’s Republican Party, you have to understand that despite the fact that they had on the stage five governors, three senators, and a brain surgeon, first and foremost they wanted to get the opinion of Donald Trump—a ham-colored cartoon character from I Love the ‘80s. Once you accept that, the rest of the night makes perfect sense.
 
[[Category:Disambiguation]]
That’s all they have to sell: fear. Hope and change meet pee and poo. The entire slate of them up there seemed entirely unaware of the fact that women can now vote. Megyn Kelly asked Trump right off the bat about Trump calling women ‘fat pigs,’ ‘slobs,’ and ‘dogs.’ Trump’s answer? ‘I don’t have time for political correctness.’ He’s like one of those construction workers from the ‘70s who goes, ‘Nice tits. Oh, what? I can’t compliment a lady anymore?’ It’s crazy.”| --[http://www.salon.com/2015/08/08/bill_maher_unloads_on_nasty_boorish_sexist_ignorant_smug_donald_trump/ Bill Maher,] a typical libtard who can't be more mature than "pee and poo."}}
[[Category:TV and Movies]]
 
[[Category:America]]
==The Gallery==
{{cg|Trump Gallery|trump|center|<gallery>
Image:Donald-trump-fired.jpg|O rly?
Image:Dturmp.jpg
Image:Dtrump1.jpg
Image:Dtrumpmolest.jpg|Molestation
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Trump_hell_toupee.jpg
Image:Shitbrix_trump.png|When you see it, you'll shit brix.
Image:Trump.jpg
Image:Trump2.jpg|i think teh donald is a [[pretty cool guy]]. eh demands birth certifiate and doesnt afraid of chinese.
Image:Trump3.jpg|You Mad?
Image:Trump-president-2012.gif|[[Obama|"Change Niggaz!"]]
Image:Trump1.jpg
File:Trump Nazi SS.jpg|[https://archive.is/X26Ep Trump, putting the "ss" back in "business".
Image:Donald_Cat.jpg|Donald's cat.
Image:YourfiredRat.jpg|Donald's rat.
Image:Fired.jpg|Setting the standard.
Image:Trumpin.jpg|He's in your sky, ruining your views.
Image:Rosie0.jpg|Rosie O'Donnell, the Donald's only natural enemy.
<!--Missing Image:Donald-duck.gif|Not to be confused.-->
Image:Twitter_-_Trump_Gets_Pwned.png|Trump gets pwned on [[Twitter]].
Image:Rudy in drag on snl in 2000.jpg|Trump pals around with his friend [[Rudy Ghouliani]]
</gallery>}}
 
== See Also ==
* [[Bernie Madoff]]
* [[Business]]
* [[Blaming China]]
* [[Fired]]
* [[God]]
* [[Jews]]
* [[Money]]
* [[Rosie]]
* [[The Man]]
* [[Ceiling Cat|The True God]]
 
== External Links ==
* {{youtube|xGZaCnfNgLE|The Donald VS. Rosie - Trump calls Rosie a failure.}}
* [http://www.etonline.com/tv/news/38140/index.html Entertainment Tonight covers Trump/Rosie drama] - lol
 
{{jewseries}}
{{Trolls}}
[[Category: People]]

Latest revision as of 04:27, 9 November 2024

Picture of Donald J. Trump, who is an average human being, helping out a perfectly normal human child.

Donald John Trump is a white American male and the 45th and 47th President of the United States. He was born on June 14th, 1946, and has an estimated net worth of $5.5 billion. He is married to Melania Trump, and his children include Donald Jr., Ivanka, Eric, Tiffany, and Barron. He also appeared in the movie Home Alone 2 as a friendly but otherwise average human being.

This is about as neutral and unbiased as we can get about him. If you want to read a completely biased and absolutely one-sided article about Trump, check out these articles:

If neither of these articles suit your needs... then what are you doing here?

Related Articles

External Links

This is a disambiguation page — you're fired.