Hungary: Difference between revisions

{{merge|Austria}}

[[Image:Goolash.jpg|thumb|right|400px|According to most of the world, Hungary's sole export is this surprisingly shitty tasting dish.]]

[[Image:Hungary flag.jpg|thumb|120px|left|Flag of Hungary, designed specifically to be mistaken with the Italian flag and thus get whiney Hungarian's [[Emo|panties in a bunch]].]]

'''Hung(a)ry''' is a sludge dump in [[Europe]], a member of the [[EU]] and full of <strike>Hungarians</strike> [[Gypsies]] and native population of Mongols. Surrounded by dirty ignorant niggerly [[Slav|Slavs]], and mistaken as Slavs by the [[Retards|rest of the world]], Hungarians have no [[money]] or ambition. The name Hungary stems from a drunk joining of "hung" (referring to their sexy horses' endowments), and "ary" a lovable contraction of what Europe originally called them, the [[Gays|fairyians]]. In the native language Hungarians call their country "Magyarorszag" (rather "Magyarország"), probably because they are [[Fucktard|fucktarded]]. Also [[Romanians|Romania]] call them bozgors.

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[[Image:Horse.jpg|thumb|left|400px|The face that launched a thousand [[Ronery|ronerys]]. Hung like, well, hung like a horse.]]Hungarians originate in some N-W Asian regions which nobody gives a shit about. Due to a very unfortunate [[Gypsies|mixture between sesquatch whores and asian niggers]] the [[Gypsies|hungarian people]] has been created , which swarmed into the N-eastern Europe causing local [[Lulz|drama]] and some mighty pieces of genocide.

Hungarians showed up around the 8th century AD from the middle of nowhere and set in to [[Pwn|pwning]] the rest of Europe until they got it out of their system. Despite reducing most of Central Europe to a fucking a [[Tabula Rasa|wasteland]], Hungarians have never been credited with being the badasses they really are. Displaying remarkable, if predictable, [[Racism|racism]], history books more eagerly discuss the accomplishments of the blonde blue eyed Vikings. Why historians, a bunch of scheming [[Jews]], would favor [[Whitey|Whitey]] over slightly brown people is utterly unanswerable.  

After raping and pillaging Europe, Hungarians returned their original past times of recording [[Scat|shit porn]], recording [[beastiality]], and recording [[Ugly|ugly]] bitches engaging in this.  

[[Image:Hungary_Time_Magazine_Cover.jpg|thumb|right|200px|I think Hungarian is a pretty cool guy. eh kills russians and doesnt afraid of anything]]

Later on the [[Chinks|Mongols]] became butthurt that the Hungarian women were fucking all the best horses, and proceeded to invade and utterly buttfuck Hungary. Like three times. The Hungarians would prove so weakened by this that even a bunch of [[Austria|German rejects]] could take them over.

During the [[Cold War|slightly chilly sub-arctic war]], Hungary was overrun with [[Russians|Slavs]] who built some [[Your Mom|ugly as fuck]] apartment buildings and regulated the horse fucking and porn filming. Naturally, the Hungarians rebelled. In the year 1956 the Hungarians got fucking [[Pwn|shit on]] by a force of [[Over 9000|Over 9000]] Russian tanks. The [[United States|Western powers]] bravely applauded the effort and then didn't send any aid, instead deciding that putting the Hun's picture in a fucking magazine was good enough help.  

<s>[[Nobody cares|By the way]],in the 20th century, 15 generations of hard [[Alcohol|drinking]] and [[Drugs|infected pork]] had produced a bunch of fucking [[Truth|geniuses]] who invented, among other things:<br/>

[[Wikipedia:Hungary#Science|Hungarian inventions include the noiseless match (János Irinyi), Rubik's cube (Ernő Rubik), the first electric motor(1827) and first electrical generator (Ányos Jedlik), Ottó Bláthy, Miksa Déri and Károly Zipernowsky invented the transformer in 1885[56].[56] Ottó Bláthy invented the Turbogenerator and Wattmeter, Telephone exchange (Tivadar Puskás), Ford Model T and production line (therefore he is the inventor of industrial mass production) (József Galamb), Tungsten filament lamp (Sándor Just), krypton electric bulb (Imre Bródy), Electronic Television and camrera-tube and the transmitting and receiving system (1926) and Plasma TV (1936) (Kálmán Tihanyi), radar astronomy and Electroluminescent light (LED) technology Zoltán Bay, mathematical tools to study fluid flow and mathematical background of subsonic and supersonic flight and inventor of swept-back wings "father of Supersonic Flight" (Theodore Kármán), early ramjet propulsion (Albert Fonó), Turboprop jet-engine by (György Jendrassik). Several other inventions were made by Hungarians who fled the country prior to World War II, including the nuclear chain reaction and nuclear reactor as well as the first Particle accelerator (all by Leo Szilard), holography (Dennis Gabor), the ballpoint pen (László Bíró), the hydrogen bomb (Edward Teller (Teller Ede), and the BASIC programming language (John Kemeny, with Thomas E. Kurtz).]]</s>  Nobody cares. <br/><br/> tl; they pretty much are why the [[Whitey|civilized world]] isn't still fucking pigs on thursday afternoons. Thanks to Hungarians, people can now ''search for and masturbate to'' the video of ''one specific [[whore]]'' fucking a pig on a thursday afternoon.]

[[Image:Death to gypsies.jpg|thumb|right|140px|Translation:Death to the Gypsies. This is seriously [[Truth|real]] graffiti.]]

Hungarians, who call themselves [[Moonspeak|Magyar]] have no ties whatsoever with the rest of [[Europe]] but are actually lost albino [[Mongolia|Mongolians]]. The proper demonym is Horse Niggers. 

As [[Truth|Hungarians are not Slavs]] the sort of ethnic muddying you see in other [[Ghetto|Eastern European]] countries is not nearly so prevalent. The Slavs and their dirty thievery are not welcome, and the Slavs do not wish to come. The chances of finding a black person here are about as high as the chances are of [[you]] getting laid and [[Bullshit|not]] paying for it. Don't celebrate too fast, white supremacists, Hungary is not the promised [[Switzerland|land of whitey]]. Instead of niggers, Hungary has [[gypsies]], which are like niggers, but they have [[Truth|dark magic, master theiving skills, and 10 kids per woman]]. So actually, they are sort of exactly the same. There are some Germans here that showed up [[Atleast 100|atleast 100 years ago]] when they decided they wanted a climate [[Bullshit|approximately]] 1 degree warmer.

The influence of all the [[whores]] in Hungary is evident in the language, as men, lesbians, and women who have not [[Blowjob|choked on 4 cocks at once]] will find pronunciation extremely difficult. [[Your Mom]], however, will have no problems at all. The language has some similiarities to [[Finland|Finnish]] and [[Moonspeak|Estonian]], but it's sort of like saying [[C|C]] and [[Cock|Python]] are similar languages because they are both imperative. [[nerd|And if you laughed at that]], you should [[An hero|kill yourself]].

Another interesting fact about the Hungarian language is their unique way of telling if you are drunk. The traditional way of saying "cheers" is "Egészségedre" which means, "Up with your health!" but if you are a drunk your speech becomes slurred and it ends up meaning "[[buttsex|up your ass]]" this has produced many LULZ in Hungary for many centuries. Thus showing that Hungarians are as [[retarded|simple minded]] as [[newfags]] and [[spam|will get drunks to say this every time]] like some [[old meme|old over used meme]].

[[Image:GypsyBeatingMeeting.jpg|left|thumb|300px|An Hero Square Gypsy Beating Party.]]

[[Image:Beastcock.JPG|right|thumb|HungAryan slut show sum luv for her husband]]

[[Image:Beastcartoons_in_hungary.jpg|right|thumb|typical hungarian kiddie cartoon. No srsly.]]

*'''[[Gypsy]] beating''' is a common activity and since its inception in the 50's, Hungary's original sport of choice, Soccer, has <strike>fallen into disuse</strike> became alternate fertilizer, resulting in the [[Truth|one of the most storied soccer countries in the world not being in a world cup for 4 decades]]. This occupation has spread into Hungarian politics, the current ruling [[lemonparty|party]] came to power by organizing a national Jew and [[Gypsy]] beating league complete with uniforms, flags and rules (see picture). The rest of [[Cunts|Europe]] has approved of these actions and frequently sends [[gypsies]] to the [[shithole|country]].  

* '''[[Drinking]]:''' is an activity undertaken by nearly everyone over the age of the second trimester. The Hungarian national drink is Palinka, which is the distilled blood of gypsies mixed with their fresh tears. Also, you fucking can't make this up, they're most famous drink, the one everyone gets as a gift and drinks on special occasions like Bailey's or Absolut, is called Unicum. Unicum, which is made by [[Jews]], can blame its name on some [[Austria|cockmongler Austrian emperor]] who decided to prank his loyal subjects by making them call it Unicum.  

* '''Paprika''' Made from dried peppers, Paprika is actually Hungarian for [[crack]]. They put it on fucking [[Your Mom|everything]] and it turns your shit [[red]].

* '''Scat and Beastiality''' Although nowhere near as successful as the [[Germany|Germans]] or the [[Japan|Nips]] in either market, Hungarian women have a strong affinity for getting together and administering loving [[fellatio]] to their pets. They are also in so much scat that when you fly to Hungary, you are pretty sure [[Truth|all 4 of the stewardesses]] were in a video together that you saw two weeks ago.

* '''Being Ugly''' Huns are not good-looking people. Maybe that's why only horses will fuck them, and why the population is shrinking. See picture.

* '''[[Failure]]''' Magyars have a history of failing at anything important. Even when the odds are overwhelmingly in their favor ([[soccer|see 1954 world cup]], or pretty much any battle they have fought) they still manage to fuck it up. Due to a history of catastrophic stupidity, Hungarians have largely been killed off and replaced by Jews, Gypsies, and Slavs who think they are Hungarians and hate [[Jews]], [[Gypsies]] and [[Slavs]]. Regardless of all their [[epic|epic failure]], they have successfully beat down the [[shit noone cares about|Slovaks]] whenever given the chance and pretty much taught them that [[fucking]] [[bestiality |horses]] is better than [[incest|sleeping with your immediate family]].  

* '''[[Suicide]]''' Magyars are very [[fucktarded|rational]] people and have realized that unless they can get out of their [[shithole|country]], they might as well [[An Hero|off]] themselves, as a result they have had [[success|great success]] in either leaving the [[shithole|country]] and becoming sex slaves or [[an hero|an heroing]]. Nine out of 10 Hungarian National Heroes have become an heroes when they realized they are Hungarian National Heroes. (Fun fact: they have the only prime minister who killed himself while being in office. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/P%C3%A1l_Teleki] He killed himself for attacking Yugoslavia, thus entering WW2; the irony is that he still hated the Jews.)

==Food==

Hungarian food is defined by the aforementioned Paprika. Despite being dry as dust and tasting like dirt, it is well loved by the population. When a food borne illness knocked paprika off store shelves in 2005 they shit their pants so bad [[Truth|that NPR was talking about it all the way in the US]].  

The other essential ingredient in Hungarian cuisine is grease. If you are served any dish in Hungary and just the fumes don't give you chest pain, demand a new meal, as you are not being served authentic cuisine but touristy crap. Hungarians are also known to fortify such food as bread or vegetables, things naturally lacking in grease, by dipping them in chicken fat or frying them in chicken fat.

[[Image:Cauldron Goulash.jpg|thumb|right|200px|Look closely for the beads of grease on the top.]]

[[Image:Economic_support.JPG|thumb|These two hungarian hotel receptionists support the HungAryan economy in their free time]]

Finest grape liquor of the Soviet Union after Bulgaria's. You'll be a well-cultured gentleman when you surprise your hosts with a good bottle of Hungarian Wine that [[fail|doesn't require a corkscrew to open]].

*A certifiably second world country, Hungary is a place that continues to juxtapose success and the wonders of middle class life with crushing hopeless poverty. For every Ikea/Walmart/Porn-store giant building of capitalist merchandise there are 15 shitty apartment projects populated by old people who live off their welfare checks from the gubment.

*Hungary holds the world record for [[inflation art|hyperinflation]]; which pretty much means they have failed most conclusively at running an economy out of anyone in the world, at any time in history. Thats right, even [[Zimbabwe|Niggas]] are better at running an economy than Hungarians. Luckily, a lot of [[Jews]] live in the country and are pretty much responsible for ensuring Hungarians have enough money to wash themselves before [[buttsecks]] from their Jewish overlords.

==2010 Sludge attack==

*In some weird relation to a rebellion against Austria in the 1840's, Hungarians did not toast with beer for [[at least 100]] years, and are still pretty uncool with it.

*There is a saying in Hungary that goes "The [[Poland|Pole]] and Hungarian are [[Gay|two good friends]], [[buttsex|they fight]] and drink their [[Jenkem|wine]] together."

*The /'''b'''/ [[Old_Media|Animated Drama]] Duckman owes its pervertedness to its Hungarian writers Klasky/Csupo.

==Trolling Hungarians==

*Hungarians hate <strike>Slavs</strike><strike>Austrians</strike>Gypsies and are eternally in sworn warfare with them. Troll them by calling them <strike>Slavs</strike> <strike>Austrians</strike>Gypsies and say how in school everyones taught that Hungarians are <strike>Slavs</strike> <strike>Austrians</strike>Gypsies.

*Telling Hungarians that Transylvania rightfully belongs to Romania.

*Asking if they are "hungry" Because they haven't heard that joke [[over 9000|a million times already]].

*Point out how their bankrupted Government rents not only their Capital City but also whole infantry divisions to Californian Gay Porn producers.

*Shout [[Borat]] quotes directly to their faces. Or just cum on their faces without paying them.

*Tell them they speak a gypsy dialect of Turkish.

==See Also==

*[[Eastern Europe]]

*[[Gypsy|Gypsies]]

*[[Austria|Gay Neighbors]]

[[Category:Locations]]